All Comments on 'A Slow Dance'

This one should have stayed in the incomplete folder. So you just tacked on a half assed ending and posted it?

Slickly done.......as that General knew, Bill was a dangerous man. Sheila knew that as well. As for the unfaithful wage slave, well......she was making a lot of money. Well thought out plot.

I wonder what dear ANON wanted as a complete ending? A story that ended with Annabelles death? Ah, well, a little foreshadowing but quite well done.

You know, a slimy cheating deplorable cunt was allowed to live when she should have joined the judge. This needed a better ending. Very disappointing.

meandering, unfinished, unsatisfying shit. what a waste of five minutes.

Not finished, boring, why bother posting an unfinished story just because some can't wait?

so poetic, always faithful, no matter what service you were in, the rule applies. TK

.... for those with any imagination.

Not every story has to lay out a course of revenge like bread crumbs on the forest floor, and hit the reader with it like a two by four. Subtlety is sweet! When the hammer falls, she will know! Annabelle has a lot of growing to do; plenty of time for vengeance! Taking one's time, and drinking one's victory a sip at a time might be much more satisfying..

In any event, I'm more impressed by the way they worked the cops over.... masterful!

Full marks...

and thank you!

as Semper Fi, with all the ramifications. TK U MLJ LV NV

I agree with most comments...It's finished!!! Well written, with a lot of mistery...We knew he was involved (he was an expert in solving those kind of situations...), but even if before the ending we could understand who the FBI agent was, the end was surprisingly good...4*

Not a fan of this. The wife got away scot-free and that doesn't sit well with me.

Not going to rate it though.

The first thought that pops into my head wasn't a good idea.

I see a new story by RichardGerald , and I think " Oh boy, how is the writer going to fuck -up the husband character by the end of this story."

Man, oh man! Am I being prejudiced in a bad way.

Well, I hope I'm wrong!! Comment tomorrow.

AMerryman

Grim world portrayed here. Cynical, depressing and weak. The weakness comes from the immoral characters. They didn't do the right thing, or even try to do the right thing. They gave into temptation and took the path to hell. Yuck.

On a practical and positive note, there is an epilogue in here somewhere. Ben could muster out of his marriage with an honorable discharge, no child support and a tidy bit of the marital estate. Of course, that would have to come after he determined that he had fucked up, confessed (to God at least), repented, and realized that owed himself a decent life and a decent wife.

I have to agree with AMerryman. After reading about your male characters becoming cynical and giving in to their manipulative cheating wives or becoming willing cuckolds from the start, I have avoided your stories. When I saw this was only three pages, I took a chance.

I have to agree that it is a finished product. To many, though, it will be unsatisfying, because as men sometimes do, he is staying for his daughter (whose DNA I'm sure he had tested, after seeing the inscription on the watch) and not damaging her home life by confronting his wife. Abundant sex and the wife's income won't hurt, either. The man who has killed so easily has found someone totally innocent to treasure.

...It was excellent in all ways, plot, pace and prose. Congratulations, Rick well done. Panther fan.

I loved this because of the cold revenge. The author set up his characters from the start. Not all men are hot heads that need to rant and rave. Some are capable of a long term revenge. So different from the usual cuck, reconciliation or over the top revenge stories . Thanks

i am lost here, why did the writer NOT let her know face to face that he knew all about her whoring ways with the Judge

"she and everyone who worked with Len and Kate knew of the relationship between the prominent defense attorney and the Judge.” – What? EVERYONE knew of a relationship between a prominent defense attorney and a judge, and nobody says anything about the potential conflict of interest?

“Most people believed that Bill had at least acquiesced in her relationship with Len.” – Why would people think that? Would THEY “acquiesce to it?

Even if they think Bill “acquiesced” to the relationship, why in the world would they try to humiliate him by treating her like the mourning spouse?

“Love Kathrine and Annabelle” – What? Was Annabelle LEN’S daughter?

@betrayedbylove – But then he wouldn’t have her six figure income. PLUS, if BOTH his wife and her lover were killed, there’s no way he’d ever get away with it!

I AM a little torn here. While I’m happy with his vengeance, I DO oppose capital punishment, so death for adultery seems a bit harsh! Also, despite claims of somehow being under the lover’s “spell”, or whatever, it is the cheating wife who broke the vow of fidelity, so the fault/blame is ultimately with her, not the lover.

I admire this story on an intullectual level with the theme of powers on different levels clashing . A federal judge has serious juice and while alive he used it without discrimination and minimal discretion. It turns out the husband had his one point of leverage of his own to wield and did so.

Does the wife's beauty, six figure income and mother status to his daughter give her immunity for her deception ? Is their daughter even his by blood ? To me , those are questions just as interesting as the actual whodunit. My guess is they are done on a meaningful emotional level.

Things may shake out further in sequel if RG is tickled by muse. Here's hoping.... but then all of Richard Gerald 's narrators are compelling regardless of the soundness of the plot machinations supporting them. I was reminded of Oliver Luck and the Indiana Colts with this story. The former is of first rate quality and is unfortunately entwined with a team that is not quite on his level.

This took a few reads before puzzle came together. It tried my patience but was worth the trouble. To me , this is a four star story, but is best story of day in a crowded field and therefore gets bumped up a star.

Full marks *****

1) Every character mentioned had some relevance to the story

2) there was one (!) plot

3) These were flawed, but human and even humane characters on some level

4) I understood the investigation

5) It was tightly written

One thing I did not like was the exculpatory nature of the 'Oh...he was a powerful man' handwave. This very much an excuse. If a woman has license to be a sexual being (and I never deny them this right), than they are also RESPONSIBLE for that sexuality. One does not get to be 'Pro Choice' (I get to abort or not abort) except when the choices have a few drawbacks (Hence my opposition to Affirmative Consent laws and the Drunken Double Standard)

But this is a philosophical quibble. I can see some women viewing these this way (or thinking it a handy excuse for acting the way they want to) but I do not admire the Greek Chorus of ladies (2 out of 3 female characters) who all sang the same song.

On a technical level, it isn't quite a five star to me. I felt it lacked something in the post death husband and wife relationship. First, it was unclear exactly what was happening (were they in a sexual dry spell...was he fucking her every day...did that change...) and further, this supposedly intelligent woman never seemed to question, worry or do ANYTHING except put up with sexual advances from a man whom she clearly did not value very highly in that department.

I could have used a lot more of that relationship and that worry to square the circle for me. Instead we had a headlong rush into the twist with a totally unnecessary POV shift.

Otherwise, I enjoyed it a lot. You have really cleaned up your writing a lot from C and P, particularly that atrocious last chapter.

Yes, it shows improvement! FD45 is on to something with a FEW of his comments, when he reveals what he (and I) feel was lacking, was a more complete look at the prime marital relationship surrounding the murder, the investigation, and its aftermath.

Perhaps you KNEW that already, which is why this was "unfinished", until a recent review. I was put off by the sexual relationship of the cops. Why spend the time to develop that relationship INSTEAD of focusing on the discussions of the marriage at hand?

Its not like it was horrible, but it was a choice. It served to be a distraction for BOTH the characters and the readers. I think the 3rd person POV would have been better overall, instead of switching back and forth, or even just staying with 1st person POV entirely. Others may disagree, but that is just my opinion.

I agree with LSD about it being an interesting exploration of power games and sexual politics at various levels for these "legal profession" players. But, as you already feared, to really do 'justice' for the character development and message clarity of the piece, this would have had to become a much longer, larger, and more dynamic work.

As it was, I think the refined approach to a (simpler) " did he or didn't he?" murder mystery WAS entertaining, and most welcome, even if the effect of what you were going for suffered a little bit from the foreshadowing-as-exposition narrative that this more condensed form seemed to dictate.

Still, in all, a very strong entry, that was very much appreciated by me. Solid 4*s

Thanks for sharing.

One of the best here in a long time. I love the turn around and close. Keep it up.

Five stars

Maybe next time you can kill the wife, too. Divorce by capital punishment. That would fix the bitch! Really badly thought out and executed. It feels like you just threw something together to get it out there.

Love the suspense, the twists, good job full marks. Would enjoy more of these two in the future....

If this had been a film noire then Bill's backstory, here told in the first few paragraphs, would have been a late reveal, to add the 'twist' of complicity. Here, with only three tightly written pages, it is a transparent set-up for Bill and Sheila. The writing is no less interesting, just a limitation of the written word.

If this was a film noire, then the aim would be to explore dark motives in the darker regions of the human soul. Here's where the story isn't clear. Bill comes across as the sympathetic hero. But, murder? If this had been a crime of passion then Bill would have been, at best, a sociopath.

His military backstory, as well as his calculated approach to discovering his wife's infidelity (including the usual BTB trope of him not even talking to her, to get an explantion) and the manner of the murder, makes him a psychopath.

So, there are good elements of a 'film noire' in here but, written as a BTB story, it is revenge fantasy pure and simple, with wife's guilt taken for granted - a moral crime that justifies murder. Only in the BTB universe.

Still would like some more revenge for the wife. However, it should be colder still. If she thought that her husband had killed her lover maybe she should feel her own impending doom.

Boyd Percy

When you teach people to kill when they have a problem they kill when they have a problem. Fucking cunt gonna have a hard time explaining that watch. So now let the whore work for him.

I enjoyed the story very much and liked the "quiet revenge" of the husband. I think a sequel 10 years later would be great...were the wife picks up some clues that maybe.... just maybe....she doesn't know her husband so well and he might in fact have killed her lover. The fact that it was actually her being kept in the dark for all of their marriage instead of him might just unsettle her some....

Do wish more exchange between husband and wife had occurred but a good read. Thanks for writing it. "Buckeye Fan"

You most always come up with interesting and unexpected twists, and this was no exception. Thanks!

You draw self centered and selfish, but somehow vulnerable female characters better than anyone on this site. I sometimes suspect that despite your nom de plume that you are female. Regardless, I'll look forward to your next effort.

I just have to say great story and a big old 5 to really piss off the old ugly ED fag dear annony! Nothing worst that a fag who can't get it up. Right asshole of LIT?

Google Streetview does not provide LIVE views. Ha ha. What a riot.

Great writing as usual.

I would have liked more on what he did about the wife.

Will she cheat again? You wrote her such that she would.

I dditn see any consequences for her at all.

Did he do a DNA test? Most would.

So, I think it needs another chapter.

Clearly a 5!

Love it I hope you add another chapter with his wife realizing what her husband might have just pulled the trigger when she thought he was a pushover

Very well written and unique.

I also didn't like the "powerful man" meme. Kate disrespected her husband right from the start. If she wanted to keep fucking around, she shouldn't have gotten married. All her reasoning is BS excuses. She is supposedly a smart woman but she rose to the top by fucking the boss.

While an explicit revenge might have been good, she is married to a man who knows exactly what she is and will never love her. At some point he can leave and get half of all the money she has made. It will be a cold, cold revenge. That almost makes it satisfying. There is no whining of how Bill can't get along without Kate. She is just as dead already as if he put a couple between her eyes as well. Kate just doesn't know it yet.

I think the revenge was absolutely perfect here, because she loved him, and she really thought she loved him, so it cannot be judged by anyone, what she really feels but she was not burnt, as she was was not someone you can hate, irritating? yes, but cannot be hated but now she has husband who she thinks loves her and now he also gets what he wants, at-least he is out of illusion, slowly pain will fade, he might find someone or maybe not but he wont be alone, and he is free from bonds, so he can always find another partner. If he leaves her in future, She will know how it feels. so eventually he is in control totally. good one.

Anyone who has ever been in a warzone hears rumors, at least. When I was in Afghanistan, I knew for sure that it happens, similarly to how you described it in this tale, RG.

In the case I'm thinking about, a S-4 (Logi &Supply) butterbar in my Batt. decided it would be a good idea to drug a female Clerk over at the main HQ and take advantage of her. The young lady in question didn't remember much about the assault itself, but she remembered waking up naked next to the butterbar. She reported it to the MPs, who asked our CO about it. The Asshole NEVER left our base, but three days later he stepped on an IED ten klicks out. It was hushed up, but everyone knew what had happened. 2nd Batt. takes care of our own messes, and no need for a court-martial. One of our guys informed her of what happened, of course. I heard she was pleased with the result.

Officers HATE scandals. Company grade, Field grade, or General. It doesn't matter. The higher up the food chain they are, the more they hate them. Anything like this that goes through official channels is going to bring a serious shitstorm down on their command.

Now to the tale itself. I liked this one, even though Hubby didn't divorce Wifey. He just made her life hell from then on, and now sponges off of her earnings. I'm guessing, anyway. Getting a DNA test on Annabelle might be a good idea, though. For medical purposes, of course. But considering that most hospitals do a DNA test at birth anyway, in case of any future medical emergency, he probably already knows that she's his. It's been SOP for the last 5 years or so.

4 Stars

I had hoped that at the end the cunt would see hubby wearing the watch and choke to death on something. What a worthless cunt. Five stars minus one for the whore not paying a price.

Would also like to have seen him with a DNA test result saying he wasn't the father. One nice thing would for hubby to pin the murder on the whore.

This story had a plot and a well delivered ending. Both are rare these days. The story was complete and it was well written. The wife is one of the worst villains in recent memory. She had so little regard for the man she married that it made her evil. It is odd that a smart husband didn't pick up on her affair.

"It is odd that a smart husband didn't pick up on her affair."

He did pick up on it. That's why the judge is dead.

Sometimes, smart doesn't mean confrontation. Sometimes smart just quietly gets the job done with such finesse you don't see it.

Or, maybe a chapter 2?

Husband gets a hold of watch (out of police custody; as he has the inside means) and, plants it for wife to find... Giving her an inkling of what her husband is capable of. Or, at least some sort of repentance from wife for leading husband on for so long. She definitely needs a certain amount of cummupence.

And, having DNA on kid done that severs all ties to dead "boyfriend"... Just some thoughts.

Otherwise nice story gave it 4*; mainly for not some adverse effects on wife.

I enjoyed this story and had that "aha" moment in the middle.

Like a few other commenters, while this story is a good stand-alone, it seems ripe for a second chapter or continuation.

Whatever you decide, thanks for a very enjoyable read.

Please keep writing!!

Terrific tale!

But do it from her point of view. That way you can get into the power relationship between judge and her, the emotions that would be involved with her continuing the affair after marriage, and you can also weave in some things like Bill introducing the watch. Great read, loved it.

This is way better than anything else published on this site for months. Economical, adult, well-paced. If I could offer a couple of comments, I thought the sex between the officers was a distraction and it is hard to accept that the husband took so long to pick up on the affair.

Old tapes taped over again and again with old cameras.

Recovering images that were taped over from them?

You could use those to show Bigfoot was there, since the images would be about the same quality as the famous but so blurry 'video of Bigfoot'.

Hope he drains as much cash out of the funds as possible maybe re mortgage the house to the max and hide the money. Go to casinos often making like you have a gambling problem. Finally get divorced most likely getting money from your high paid wife's salary. Leaving her high and dry with huge bills and s home going into forclose. She will deserve any pain he could inflict on her. I would also whisper in her ear that I did it and enjoyed it and wish I could do it to her also. Great story chapter 2 would be nice

I always look forward to your stories. Excellent.

I think his comment about "she is Annabelle's mother" is very telling. He knows he is not the father of Annabelle, but loves her unconditionally anyways. Hurting or divorcing his wife would negatively impact his daughter, so he decided stay and take care of her.

Could very well be a stand alone story; however,I wouldn't mind a sequel which takes place around Annabelle's 18th birthday, when he finally confronts his cheating bitch of a wife and she gets her long awaited punishment.

4 stars for me

I loved this story. Especially the twist at the end

with reading comprehension. I stated that it was odd that the seemingly smart husband didn't pick up on the wife having an affair. Anon kindly pointed out that the husband did pick up on it. The wife was sleeping with the boyfriend before she married her husband and it continued for years before he realized it. That seems really odd since they made no effort to conceal the affair. I stand by my statement that for a smart guy, she kept him in the dark for a very long time with no effort what-so-ever. Even in a large city, an affair so public would draw a great deal of attention. That was the only problem I had with this well written story.

I can imagine the pleasure the husband had at the funeral listening to his wife receive condolences for her lover's death; the same Bozo he shot in the head. Some people are not happy with revenge unless others know about it. In the case of murder, it's best to keep the pleasure of the revenge in one's memory, and never voice it.

The story line and flow of this tale were superb...better than lots of short stories I've read in publications such as The New Yorker, Harper's, etc. The twist at the end was marvelous. I had no clue that the female FBI agent was the raped soldier or that she was doing what she did.

The cowardly "Anonymous" writers who go on and on about the lack of a slam-bang punishment for Kate have obviously never read any significant literature. They live in a world of black and black...no gray, not even some white. Ignore them.

Kate and Ben are on their first trip without Annabelle, who is off to college and doing well. Ben has Kate backing up to an overlook for a photograph, on the edge of a shear drop off. Ben has Kate backup to the edge as far as practical, then walks up to her, grabs the front of her shirt, pulling her into a kiss. Then he whispers in her ear, "Just thought you would like to know, the DNA test shows Annabelle is mine. Enjoy your lover, in hell." Then he pushes her over the cliff. Of course a huge insurance policy would have been in place for years, plus her retirement and savings. Upon Kate's death it will come to light that Kate was acting as trustee over a huge estate setup by Len for Kate and his supposed daughter, Annabelle. Ben will inherit Kate's portion of Len's estate, and use Annabelle's portion as intended, with the usual trustee fees to himself, of course. Ben and Sheila's relationship finally becomes romantic and intimate, while Annabelle mourns her lost mother and moves on under the care of her devoted father.

It was a good story. At the end became a really great story. I thoroughly enjoyed the twist at the end. Good Job. Well written. 5 stars

Please keep writing and I will keep reading.

Good story, but I'm getting tired of the lack of eroticism in stories in this category. Erotic means sometimes I should get a hardon- and not one like the sick wackos around here get over revenge. No 5s without my dick getting hard.

but as others have said, as the husband was written he wouldve found out way before this.still i like how he played it. give the slut a few years to build up their nest egg then he can discover his daughter isnt his. then divorce her and take half of everything.

Very entertaining story. Thanks for sharing.

Very well written story.

Way to go.

Tied everything up very nicely at the end. Enjoyable story. Keep up the good work and look forward to more of your stories. SF VET

Wow - a great story. Loved the way you unwrapped it, didn't see the Sheila/Bill connection at all. Loved the quiet twist at the end. Excellent

I had the doggoned story figured out early. That surprises me, it's something I rarely do. Even my wife makes fun of me because I don't see what's coming.

Busy patting myself on the back.....

Loved the story, especially the subterfuge of Agent Marks. I had my suspicions but wasn't sure until the end. I also especially enjoy that he killed the Judge as a consequence for his wife's betrayal. The fact that Kate may never know it was at the hand of her own husband is appropriate revenge. I just hope the bitch isn't stupid enough to do it again...I think she will but who knows. All around great story I gave it 5 *. I look forward to your next post.

Wolf_Man_1962

The only thing I thought at the end would have been that as Sheila was a good friend it might have been a private visit to the wife to let her know that she strongly thinks the her husband had done the judge but her bosses say that there is no proof and they are happy that the soldier had done it. Scare the shit out of the wife so that she will not play away again. There could be a part 2 but not sure you get as good an ending.

Excellent dialogue. Plenty of action. Completely understandable and believable plot.

This time RichardGerald doesn't screw the husband. Maybe in the sequel, lol!

Gave it 4*s. Not a fiver due to a lack of emotional drama. Even the killing occurring offstage, sort of speak.

Thank you for a good read.

AMerryman

...had figured the agent was same girl from army. It kind of clicks, rape victims do get traumatised so not having ANY romantic partner checks out, then husbands army background and rest of story... Great act with tapes. Wife probably doesn't get the full revenge she deserves, but I can not see her straying again. And in life it hardly ever happens a full blown BTB situations

Liked the twist with Sheila at the end.

As a minimum Kate needed to know that she had been found out and the doubts about the paternity of Annabelle. She has been cheating all through their marriage and it seems Bill was the only person who didn't know. Thinking she is free and clear would only encourage her to try again later.

Bill could still keep his "meal ticket" and continue loving Annabelle as he obviously loves

@jasonnh – Yes, I agree, if she was hung up on Len, and couldn’t/wouldn’t marry him, she either should have married at all, fucked anyone she wanted while being Len’s mistress, OR revealed her relationship to anyone she got serious with, and got their okay to continue it or break up.

@Anonymous Re: “Sequel requested” – I don’t think we need a sequel from her point of view. Her view point was given several times during the story: Len was her mentor, she was drawn to him and couldn’t resist him, but she couldn’t/wouldn’t marry him; she “loved” her husband, but he wasn’t “exciting”; her husband was “trusting” (naïve?).

@Anonymous Re: “drains cash” – Sure, let’s make this like 90% of the other BTB stories out there.

@Anonymous Re: “dick getting hard” – I rarely give out fives, but I have two stories for you that were solid fives in my book without any dick hardening! They are “Continental Divide” by laptopwriter, and oshaw’s “Grief”. I put qhml1’s “Did You Really Mean It?" right up there too, but that might be more of a personal taste five!

@Anonymous Re: “Great Tale Very Enjoyable” – I don’t see her doing it again. She’s not really a slut, her relationship with Len was very unique, not likely to be repeated.

The wife needed to know or at least suspect!! She will do it again after a while. The next powerful rich man that comes along she will jump into bed with.

What's the husband going to do, kill them all?? He would be wasting his life on someone who doesn't respect him really!!!

Liked the story, but would have been a great ending having the FBI lady telling the wife a few stories about her husband in the army!!!

The whore of a wife needs her so presoius career and life ahot to hell great read so far

FD45 and HDK said it all, but I believe that HDK meant he is surprised that such a sharp guy did not pick up on the affair when he was courting.

and I would like to see loose ends tied up; the paternity of Annabelle; a confrontation with Kate, whether it be with hubby or Sheila, with her telling her what her husband had done years before for her. It's kind of ironic that a man of hubby's seemingly expert investigative experience in the military police could not have been suspicious about his whore wife's behavior before that night she left with Chanel No. 5 on her skin.

Good story, except for one glaring error. The weapon is a WALTHER ppk, not a Walter ppk. Investigate before write. Still all in all, a good story. Gave it 4 *'s only because of the error of the weapon. Else it would be 5.

The murder weapon was a Walther PPK .380 calibre.

Could have been subtitled, "A Player Gets Played," but that would have given away the twist. Wonder if he'll knock up his "private whore" a few more times. Five stars for sure.

He's got to let his dear loving wife know he's the one that popped the cap between her lover's eyes and she's now just his private whore til death do they part.

Yes there were many who knew, but none of those people associated with the husband.

The people he knew didn't know about her and the judge.

This just hangs....needs some kind of an ending... The big "D"....or something ! This guy is not going to look the other way ....maybe he should lay the Rolex with her ear rings...and see what she says or doesn't say. See if she comes clean or walks away. 4 stars till it is completed.

The slut wife needs to see that expensive Rolex suddenly show up on hubby's wrist. She needs to get pics of her being a whore, coming out of a hotel room, sent to her by an anonymous email account. She needs to be driven crazy by guilt and someone threatening to blackmail her. She needs to be found out and her entire affair revealed.

My favorite all time writers are still Ohio and the Celt but man of those still posting stories you're definitly in my top 2... bravo to another well done story and hope to see a part 2 detailing what happens with his marriage.

Great plot, story and complimentary to our vets. I am one so thanks and keep writing.

Stories like this really piss me off. The plot holes here are huge. Don't get me wrong this story is extremely well written and this particular author is pretty talented and can really put together a well written story. But he seems to have problem telling the story -- by that I mean putting the story together which doesn't have the huge plot holes in it so that it ends up making some sort of sense for consistency.

The first problem is that the husband is developed as a highly competent detail powerful investigator with significant skills and friends. And this is WHY his failure to react all to what the wife has done makes NO sense.

In fact when author has the husband confront then kill her lover/ Judge (typically it's a physical beating as opposed to murder ) it comes across very much as a letdown or cop out. Why is it that **ONLY** the judge ends up paying any sort of price for what the cunt whore wife has done?

This leads to SECOND problem. It's obvious that the husband has found out about Watch/ Gift that his wife gave to her lover/ the judge. Again because we are shown how skillful this husband is as an investigator... it must occur to him that the child might not be hisr.

Yet we have no idea if he knows that in the story and what sort of impact this info has on him .

Even worse is that initially when the husband uncovers the affair ...he has no idea that it has going on for 8 years and that his baby girl might in fact not be his . So any decision he makes in the middle of the story to go after the judge and trying keep his wife is based upon flawed information.

Once the husband finds out that the wife has been fucking the Judge for eight years his inaction must hange. His reaction to finding out that the baby girl Annabelle is not his or might not be his... MUST also cause some sort of reaction with the husband.

Yet nothing happens

A bit sad, no, make that very sad, at the end. He ended up with a cheating slut wife and a daughter this was maybe his biological child. So he's going to stay with her money and his, maybe, child and be satisfied? how does he look at her every day, knowing what she was? And I really felt sorry for Sheila who seems to have no one. Once again, well written, but characters who seem to live unfullfilled lives.

M4 carbines don't use clips, they use magazines. The last rifle the US army fielded that used a clip was the venerable M1 garand. I am familiar with the the Walthers, the PP, PPK, PPK/S, but not PK. Also, they are chambered for .32 acp or .380. Don't what this 38 crap is you're talking about.

An affair lasting 8 years and he didn't have a clue.2. Staying in the marriage and never confronting her about the affair. His x comrade in arms owed him so she probably offed the judge both where in on it. So why off the judge when she was just as quilty.? It happens because we are human and all our minds go in different directions.. This story gets high scores probably from the burn the bitch crowd that loves to see blood otherwise it really is a weak story. And when will she find a new stud to fuck. .

first of all I am a gun owner and former military. I say clips as well even though I know the difference ! Its a common thing in the vernacular !

Also if you read carefully, it said Walther PP 038 ! most of these stories go to a third party editor, who I'll wager doesn't know the difference between a .380 and a .470 nitro express ! Also , ever heard of a typo !

Whoever said a little knowledge is a dangerous thing sure got that right !

....the execution of the story was so flawed. Even broken. That I found ia impossible to enjoy the story.

The FBI did not act like FBI. The cuckolded husband did not act like a man described as he was, would most likely have acted. Morgan's "feelings" for her husband seemed little more than social convenience or caring, as for a pet or a doll, not love. It seemed to be a story that was posted well before it had been properly edited, all the hard work being left to the audience.....well, you've heard it all before.....but I liked the idea of the story.

Perhaps a complete rewrite with plot work and editing to correct the out of character behaviors, plot holes and technical faux pas would be worthwhile. It has potential, was just let out before it was finished.

Nice story....a bit hard to follow and not up to the (amazing!) quality of The Bridge, but a nice tale from the master of the genre.

There is a reason why we who have served have amended the saying know one left behind. If you have ever been in a combat zone let alone combat you know what I mean. As a Viet Nam Vet there is nothing and I mean nothing I will not do for any of the people I served with over there. If not for them having my back there and back here in the world I would be dead.

You've been called on your two glaring errors. The Walther should've been a .380. Neither Neither Apple, Google, nor Bing (we won't bother with wazoo) do real-time in Find My iPhone/Street View. Add to that "discrete" and "discreet" are homophones and not interchangeable.

He's a father. Not because of DNA, because of h-e-a-r-t. Kate? Annabelle needs her momma, for the time being. One week without sex? She's just begun her penance. Sequel? Why bother? You told a complete story.

Not bad for a soldier.

Semper Fi

...that her husband was the murderer or at least the instigator. That would have put her down on earth and perhaps made her at least a bit repentent. Her arrogance - when questioned by the police - is simply unbearable. (That might be the reason why so many readers request a sequel dealing with revenge on her.)

I waited for a little hint that this will be her future until he files for divorce (as soon as the daughter leaves the house). The watch could have been a token in that scheme.

But despite that little disappointment: 4 solid * from me, keep on sharing!

Hubby wasn't so smart if he was a cuckold from the beginning. I didn't like the cheater bitch not paying a price.

3 stars. Not up to s usual calibre.

Yes, there isn't the revenge thing, some sneaking suspicion that her husband did it- I thought the watch was going to be brought in in some subtle way to let her know. The wife is despicable and so condescending to her husband. With him thinking of her as his "personal whore" and her disrespect, I can't see them sticking together long enough to raise the daughter. The inscription on the watch showed how little respect she had for her husband, or perhaps herself. I'm. not a BTB kind of guy, but I kind of get the yen for a pound of flesh here, or in a sequel. Very nice story telling- 5 stars.

What was there is worth 5*s but the tale is left without an end. Why would Bill wish to keep her after the daughter leaves home? I can understand wanting payback with Kate and treating her worse than a whore. What I cannot understand is him wishing to grow old and dying in her arms so to speak. Hey, there is only so long a person might even want a whore before the repetition and bordom sets in. Sooner or later he is going to seek a more meaningful long term relationship.

Hey, if I am in my 70s or 80s sex is not going to hold the same importance as when I was in my 40s. What am I to do with an old whore at that time?

That's my take and opinion on your ending. How about a second chapter to properly end the tale.

Ok, so I get the cucks getting exercised over the cheating wife and flinging the feces around the cages, but what about the husband? Isn't one of the big complaints around here that even an emotional affair is still cheating and that death is too good for the perpetrators?

If so, then why isn't there any condemnation for the husband who apparently has been carrying on an emotional affair since before he was married?

You need to finish this. The cuckqueen needs to feel the pain. DNA tests are a trope because they are true. Let it all blow up in her face, like when she goes for election to a judgeship.

Kate was with the Judge well before even meeting Bill. Who was she cheating on again? (Remember, she wouldn't let the Judge rub Bill's in it. Her emotional investment was with Bill.)

I think Kate understood what she had so when the Judge was snuffed it looks like she will have no problem being 100% Bill's..

With the judge out of the way do I think any of the high class lawyers where she works will come sniffing around? Yes! Do I think she will shut them down? Oh ya!

Is the Daughter Bill's? Don't know. Is there a little brother of sister in the future? To bond their marriage...I would say yes.

I noticed that some one referred to Bill and Sheila as having an emotional affair. It is more like being comrade in arms. A Band of Brothers friendship.

Good one! Didn't see that coming but looking back I should have seen the clues. Thanks for a good read.

In your other stories, the husband is usually trapped or is in a delimna about whether to go away or go back to the wife. It's your story, and this is not criticism, but I don't see how he could stay with this bitch and the child that's not his. I know, I know, he loves the child, but she's two, and she'll forget him. I don't see how he could forget what the mother did to him, and he'd have to really, really be one hell of a forgiving SOB to not let that affect his long term relationship with the child and the wife.