All Comments on 'Tammy's Caribbean Cruise Pt. 01'

Why split a sentence over two, or more, lines??

"When they were unpacking,

Dense caught sight of Tammy's rabbit vibrator. "

Also, whilst 'Denise' might possibly be 'dense' I think you merely left out a letter from her name!!

Couldn't be bothered reading any more in case there were more silly errors!!

Awesome very well written , makes me a Little Wet . A couple of typos is not the End of the World , unless of course you are not WISE enough to figure them out like somebody obviously Wasn't !!!!!!!!!

I felt for various characters-sucking a clit which has previously had lotion applied and her poor cunt, with fingers inserted which had shortly before been in her bum. But I loved "giving the rabbit a good workout later"....long,will that live in my mind. However, I was jerked back to the present day by reading "Joe would have stopped if it was getting out of hand".....This shows how "locked up" we are-I suppose this only meant while they were on the open deck,but to me the "flow" was jerked, temporarily.

Part 2 please...