All Comments on 'The Flume at Falcon Rock'

Such a good mix of sex and sweetness, from the perspectives of slightly older characters. Impressive emotional range. I was immersed for the plot even after I had an orgasm from the fucking, which isn't common. Kudos to you and your editors.

Really, really bought into this story. I often get turned off by bondage scenes but this was gentle and loving, well done. It would have been nice if Laurie could have ended up with that baby she so desperately wanted. I'm in favor of babies.

Wonderful story.Looking forward to the rest of it.

I don't normally enjoy stories this long, but you kept my interest all the way to the end. I hope there are more chapters, because I enjoy the dynamic between these two. Perhaps you could add a little incest to the mix with brother and sister coupling while brother-in-law has the new girlfriend.

...and the ending is poetically apt. The circle of life demonstrated so subtly and yet inevitably.

Perhaps a tad intense on the internal monologue, but that's exactly how older guys end up being, far more empathetic and considerate than the image they prefer to present to the world. Softer than they like to admit to, but stronger than others expect.

The tinge of sadness at opportunities missed is tempered by the mature enjoyment of the present, precisely as it should be.

It's said (and sad) that love, like youth, is wasted on the young...

Only got about 4 pages in and I was so turned off by all the "Mansplaining" that I just couldn't read anymore. He knew everything about everything and yet couldn't seem to understand why no one, except his sister, wanted anything to do with him on his 50th birthday. I was also left wondering how she was still alive after 44 years since she couldn't even handle something so simple as a skinned knee without his assistance. I found nothing relatable to either character and the story did not build any sexual tension.

It was a tad too long. but very readable. and I enjoyed it. Thank you.

I am anxiously awaiting the next installment of your saga of Laurie and Joe.

Will the bi-coastal long distance be something they can handle?

Will Laurie be able to contain her newly found sexuality?

What will happen to each of them when they return home? Will they be exclusive with each other - able to contain their passion until their next meeting?

Will they use Skype or other computer programs to ignite their emotional and sexual ties to each other when they are apart?

A myriad of questions are welling up inside me. I strongly encourage you to turn this into a novel with both prequels and sequels in subsequent chapters.

As a prequel, you could explore and expand each character's teen fantasies about the other during their teen years.

Overall a great story!! My congratulations!

....but not a great one. "Trailing Along" was the first story of yours that I read. This one is twice as long, but only half as good. Perhaps others will disagree. Tastes differ! More spelling and punctuation errors this time, which was a slight distraction. You're a good writer and you know how to create sympathetic characters. Keep writing. You have a gift -- just let it flow. Don't try to force it.

This is the first of your stories that I have read, but it won't be the last. I love that you let things build up slowly - it felt believable. The sex once it happened was so much more hot as I felt so turned on by the expectation. I am not usually that interested in bondage storylines but this felt real and was very sexy. I hope there is more to read about Laurie and Joe. Thanks!

hope to see a ch2 soon

I enjoyed it very much, am looking forward to the next chapter

Lifencan be monotone and paced, punctuated with interesting and memorable moments. I thought this story read that way. Joe is a matter of fact kind of guy. Skilled, intelligent and wise but no spark or unique character. That's cool though because most guys are. I gave this story a 4. That's high for me. I love the way it all felt so real. No crazy buss of cheerleaders picking them up after a flat tire sort of stuff. All of this could have happened (separately) to people I know in one of those more memorable moments in life. I really enjoyed reading this. It was a refreshing reality check in a world of fantasy. Thank you for all of your hard work in creating this piece. I want to read more about this couple and what waits for them down the road.

I really enjoyed your story. It had a realistic pace and was sexy and sweet.

Like some other comments posted it was potentially a bit long. As I kept reading though I grew to appreciate the slow start and helped me enjoy the story even more. You have entered an incredible story in this competition and I have rated very highly as one of the best from the smaller efforts which most are predictable. This certainly wasn't. I am very new here and yet to share anything I have written prior to now when I was just visitor to the site. I truly enjoyed this and my mind is swirling with thoughts of where it could go to. I do hope you continue this in some way as they find their true selves.

Please keep writing!! I can't wait to see what you have in store for them next!!

So often these stories are about sex but leave out the important details of a true love story. I hope you write more stories of these two.

This story captivated me completely. Like a Harry Bosch from Michael Connolly, I couldn't wait to open the next page or chapter. Where this will end is a no-brainer and I am happy about that. Only true mystery is if they change their minds about having a child or even two. I will be disappointed if this story is not a winner, and if it has already been decided, I haven't looked. BTW, I think these are the best contest submissions ever, so you are traveling in tall company.

I enjoyed this story immensely! The slow build up, the details took me back to when I was in college and had an intense relationship with a women 6 years my senior. We connected 30 years later in much the same way. Please keep writing this story and expanding the emotion and heat building between them. I look forward to the next chapter(s).

This is the kind of stuff that I like, where a story grows. However, one small point: Early on, many paragraphs of speech are closed with speech marks although the speaker continues talking. This makes it confusing as to who is saying what. Later on this is corrected. My little bug-bear, carry on.

Thoroughly enjoyed it.

You had me caring and rooting for both of them!

Hope there will be another installment.

They deserve it!

I loved the characters, and your story was totally believable as it approached the edges of reality. One of the best I have read in a long time!

Really good, believable, story and characters very well written.

i was rivetted to this story until i finished. great stuff