All Comments on 'Untraditional'

by cookingwithgas

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  • 152 Comments
LechemanLecheman13 days ago

Huh? And then...?

Masterpuppy2974Masterpuppy297413 days ago

Where's the rest of it

cookingwithgascookingwithgas13 days agoAuthor

Okay. The first comment by Lecheman I found odd. Then I looked back at the title page. OOPS! This is a three-part story, and It doesn't say that in the title. Not sure if it was me or the admin, but probably my bad. They usually do a very thorough job. Sorry for the confusion.

tazmuntazmun12 days ago

Fuck, I hate cliffhangers… And somethings definitely rotten in Denmark here… I smell a divorce… I smell an ass whupping needs to happen!

Bri29Bri2912 days ago

This is only going one way his obviously been set up like a sap,Cookingwithgas is a good writer and I will certainly keep reading , don’t know why I read these these wronged husband tales they always make me depressed afterwards 😜

Omegaman56Omegaman5612 days ago

Nine months later she gives birth to Jon kid

CD1929CD192912 days ago

I enjoy your writing I just hope this isn't some cuck shit.

AlluredAllured12 days ago

waiting to read how this progress

PencarrowPencarrow12 days ago
ANOTHER TRADITION

The story involving an island tradition and a volcano (mentioned in the intro) is “A time to cheat” by Saddletramp.

~

As for this story, I can imagine the short conversation between Mel and Rob on the plane back to the states:

“Mel, just to make things fair, when we get home I’m going to introduce you to one of our long-established western traditions”.

“Oh, what’s that about Rob? I didn’t think there were any I didn’t know about”

“Mel, you’ve probably heard of it. It’s one where I get to fuck as many women as I can without guilt or worrying about any wedding vows (and especially without thinking about you). It's called Divorce”.

DSolomonDDSolomonD12 days ago

No points yet.

I don't have time for teases. Very Bad Form.

But, I hope I read a conclusion of how he leaves the island alone and with his honor. So far he's been played like a cheap accordian.

satindesiressatindesires12 days ago

Wow, never had an acknowledgment before! Delighted if something I've written has contributed to a new story. Enjoyed the first chapter, easy 5 stars. Thanks Satin.

012Say012Say12 days ago

Unique, 5 from me, the length of the celebration, the subtitle, the punch, allude to a question of being able to square his reality and hers. Were I to guess, I’d guess he does, which would be a good outcome, except to many here. Thanks, look forward to seeing it unfold.

MwestohioMwestohio12 days ago

I don't understand why everyone didn't see in the preface that this is a three part story. As far as word choice, I think you meant humid and not arid on the beach. And Garner is a stone, not a hair comb

irinmikeirinmike12 days ago

Interesting little tale, but once again way over the top.

irinmikeirinmike12 days ago

Lastly why the partial upload of all your stories? Release the whole damn thing at once.

someoneothersomeoneother12 days ago

I will reserve judgment until the story finishes, and kudos to author for warning us that this a 3-part and preparing all before publishing the first.

The story is well written and interesting.

I know that I am presupposing the direction of the story but the big question I have assumes that the husband did not have to attend the event (and in fact he was not there as he was drugged), and that drugging and humiliating husband is not part of the tradition. Therefore, why did Mel drag her husband to the island? Even if compelled to maintain traditions, Mel could have just insisted on travelling alone and thus avoided the humiliating her husband by forcing him to forcing him to witness the tradition?

looking4itlooking4it12 days ago

If she wanted to retain her island ideals she should have graduated and gone back home.

BIGGUY441956BIGGUY44195612 days ago

Your writing seems exceptional. I look forward to the rest. I hold judgement until complete. I know it is done, so no need to say good luck. I guess good outcome is more appropriate.

Tx77TumbleweedTx77Tumbleweed12 days ago

You did an excellent job of setting up the reader for whatever disaster seems likely to follow. There can be NO justification for drugging your husband, so I can only see a dark place for the main character to be forcibly pushed into. If Mel plans to return to the US, she would seem to have made some bad choices besides the obvious lies regarding her time at the funeral and on the current festival trip.

woodwardwoodward12 days ago

Well done. I enjoyed the tradition series and am glad you are continuing it. 5!

payenbrantpayenbrant12 days ago

Ummm......I guess this is a stand alone story? Not a very good ending. You looking for someone else to finish this?

Regguy69Regguy6912 days ago

So she drugged him? I guess that's one way to make sure he didn't interfere. I'm looking forward to the next two installments.

LWLover60LWLover6012 days ago

Drugged and cucked, betrayed by his wife, childhood friend and all their relatives.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Okay I looked three times. Nowhere do you mention this is chapter one and you close with the story of the dancing and what happened wide open. He's got a hangover and then.....what? The WHOLE story is wide open and I sure don't see FTDS's initials attached. Sans another chapter this would be the worst story you've written to this point. Completely unfinished.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

A sorry assed story abd a sorry asswd author to leave it hanging like this

Mrhappy4aaMrhappy4aa12 days ago

Well, a blind man can see where this is heading. And this will not end well for Mel. She screwed up her marriage while screwing around with her lover, Jon. He should have left her there in her island home after he found out about her other husband, Jon, and went home to file for divorce from the cheating slut. Why would he drink (to get drunk?) If he wanted to catch her cheating, stupid...She lied by omission about what really is going to between her and her lover but I guess, he accepted being a cuckold. Only the next chapter will tell.... 1 star unless he grows a pair. Nothing new or different here, just the island "tradition" part from long ago and should have no standing now especially if someone is MARRIED to someone else.

ReadyOneReadyOne12 days ago

Having been drugged the previous night, I would be trying to get off the island on home to my lawyer ASAP.

.

If she doesn't stay on the island, she will face a world of hurt.

Pappy7Pappy712 days ago

I don't understand why it seems to be a fact that the women in these little tales are both entitled and brain dead. She was island bred and raised but had been with this guy long enough to know that he probably wouldn't like her giving herself to someone else in a public ritual after they were married. So to lessen his anxiety she lies to him and drugs him and leaves him right out there in front of everyone. I see capitulation and subjugation in his future unless he is able to find a weapon to use against the perfect island male and his consort (read his former wife). I foresee his inability to leave the island as a foregone conclusion so he is stuck there in his humiliation. Hopefully he won't be stupid enough to eat or drink anything his former wife gives him. She might just decide that he needs emasculating or poisoning and since she has no filters on her actions it will happen. I would guess though that he is doomed because it looks like the rest of the island is in on his downfall. But he needs to damned sure make it known his isn't going to go along with this and if need be refuse to fight for his wife. Hard to fight for your wife and your marriage when she is the one you are having to fight. Okay, so you wrote him as a pussy growing up and as an adult so I would guess his is made for this type of existence. Won't score this first one, it's already scoring low and I expect some surprise happening, not,

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

She drugged him so she could fuck Jon and get knocked up by him. She just a whore.

Escape_WithinEscape_Within12 days ago

While no reference in the title there is reference in the foreword. Again I am impressed with the eloquence and story telling. It will be interesting how this plays out in three parts. I hope there is more detail about the conversation with the Mother character. An explanation of her traditional spin of the proceedings. It is convenient he is slipped the "island mickey" as conclusion to this chapter. As in the foreword, the clash between traditions. How rational and educated people have to choose between conflicting ideals, norms and morales. Well done. The devil or demons are in the details. I also see a betrayal trope in this. Just what the wife betrayed in western traditions is awaited with bated breath. Why she married in the western tradition knowing the island one was to come. The childhood friend just strengthens the emotional punch. Again well done 5 stars.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Waiting for the rest.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

infidelity, dishonesty, cuckolding, and drugs, what a combination. pass.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Relatively original story! Good pacing, dialogue, and intrigue.

But hey, good for him. Leave the manipulative bitch on the island with Puko, hump a native girl all weekend, then fly home alone. Mel deserves no less.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

So the end of the story is two parts away as is their marriage ….

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

he should have fucked her mom and lil sister in front of her even tell her her mom was a better fuck,, he knew all along but went along even frank what she brought him,,,,mmmhuh

SunnyU2SunnyU212 days ago

You write the same stuff over and over.

TrainerOfBimbosTrainerOfBimbos12 days ago

Mmm. I guess from the description we know this isn't going to be a happy ending and from the contents of the first chapter, as much as I'd like to say the MC is being delusional, it looks like it doesn't matter if he is or not, he's in for a bad end.

<>

Maybe give away less when the series isn't completed? I don't know.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

This was a good start. I will reserve further comment, and scoring, until I see how it ends. Thanks for posting.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Oh no you mentioned both assholes: HDK & GA which now makes me think it's going to be the island equivalent of FS where the MC is not allowed to leave while his wife fucks some or all the Islanders.

BTW, about a month ago, I read a story written about an island North of Scotland with a tradition of the island's Alpha Male copulating and making the women prdgnant. I hope this isn't a variation on that theme.

FordF150guyFordF150guy12 days ago

I never read a preface as often these tell me how I’m supposed to view a story . I find this disingenuous as a story should stand on its own. That being said if it is a multi-part story then note that in the title. Thus the story’s ending was very disappointing. You should have just submitted the whole story.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Another great piece of work. I’m looking forward to more.

POPPI123

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Why wouldn’t he head home when he found out what was happening? And then he accepts their drinks. It’s just dumb decisions to create conflict

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Well what the hell was that?

Billy_Ray_BanBilly_Ray_Ban12 days ago

You cannot actively live in two different worlds - with two completely different cultures - and expect someone from outside one of those cultures - to accept the behaviors of the other - when the two are in conflict. Think about it.... If someone (Mel or Jon) felt that Rob's reaction to the festival would be bad enough that he needed to be drugged, then the two cultures are in conflict. That conflict was forced upon Rob by Mel by bringing him to the island during the festival. Before they ever traveled to the island, Mel must have known that her husband Rob (and the culture from where he came) would disapprove of the happenings at the festival. In fact, she acknowledged as much in her purposefully obfuscated attempt at explaining things to her husband. Having read only Part 1 of the story I don't have all the facts yet. But if this ends up going where I think it's going - Rob needs to get on the next hollowed-out canoe off the island and leave Mel behind for good. 4/5 (So Far) BRB

neilnblowme2neilnblowme212 days ago

guess cheaters are everywhere even on remote islands

guess your wife got you good spiking your drinks

guess now you are no considered the cuck god on that island ... lol

guess if i was you i d be on the next ferry out of there without my ex but you being the cuck god who knows

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Excellent start. Please don't drive it off a cliff with a silly and unrealistic reconciliation in the following chapters.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Long, long stretches of hubbie’s boring past history were quite unnecessary and could have easily been summarized in a short paragraph. I had to do a ton scrolling to past it and catch up to the present again. Aside from that, good story so far, but cultural considerations aside, Mel has been grossly deceptive and has been using sex and alcohol - and maybe drugs - to hamstring her husband. I am guessing that aside from sexy dancing and fucking, part of Jon’s privelege is to knock up Mel. Husband should bring her back to the States and dump her ass. Cultural respect does NOT include any of this.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Another husband written as implausible stupid and passive. As soon as she told him why they were really there extreme suspicion about the prior trip would have arisen. Any remotely normal man would have told her that she has lied to get them there, that she has betrayed him and their marriage vows, and she is deliberately planning to humiliate him. He would continue by saying that no such woman will ever be the mother of his children and that he would never want his children connected to a family and culture such as hers. He packs and leaves on the next ferry. A weaker normal man at most would tell her she might possibly salvage the marriage if she leaves immediately with him and has nothing more to do with her family, the island, and the islanders. Making that offer would be a bad choice because once there are children she would be able to do as she pleases. She is, after all, written as a treacherous, manipulative cunt.

Gmann006Gmann00612 days ago

i think it isnt finished

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Is he going to wuss out, or are there going to be a LOT of dead islanders? It’s not enough to go after the slut and the other guy. Every conspirator and enabler must be punished also!

/

ZK

Wandering_MongolWandering_Mongol12 days ago

Oh, I'm eagerly awaiting the next part!

I too, like silk's "traditions" stories, and think it's a great inspiration.

-

Be well!

doctrptdoctrpt12 days ago

Unfinished. Too bad, there's a great divorce and assault with drugs there....

SouthdownSouthdown12 days ago

When I sent you,prsonally, a stinging rebuke of your story I read the comment byOmegaman56 from about 10 hours ago

'Nine months later she gives birth to Jon kid' I had the same thought but the author is obviously brain dead to continue this farce of a story. 'cookingwithgas' either finish this worthless tale or quit and get a job sweeping roads! and do a better job than with your writing! This is grudgingly 'worth' 1* but not really!

TenementFunsterTenementFunster12 days ago

Very good point by looking4it, but if Mel went back to her tribe like Jonny-we wouldn't have a

story by CWG.

Was wondering if the unfortunate disappearance of the inhabitants of an unnamed island south

of Emae Island would be reported on the nightly news in the US of A ?

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Not a fan of her drugging him at all. I can see a way she thinks that's "compassionate" but with how he's responded (reasonably) to her attempts at that, she should know it's only going to be worse. And the idea of shunting him aside and ignoring him and leaving him partnerless...none of that is going to go well. It's well written though. Looking forward to the next 2 parts.

AnonymousAnonymous12 days ago

Wow, the beginning of a great story. As usual, you strip away all the cliches, stereotypes, and formulaic plot devices and go for the jugular of originality. Abbie Hoffman said that, "Sacred cows make the best hamburgers." LW has a herd of those bovines.

*

From a technical standpoint, it's not your best. Early in the story, we read a sentence that made no sense. I almost think it was missed and not deleted during the editing or rewriting. Then, there was "peaked" interest rather than "piqued." Some of the wording constructions were awfully passive voice when a slight rewrite or a better verb would give the sentence the "Ommphf" to make it a gem. Your editor needs to catch that and not just read it and say, "Yo, s'all good brah!" Overall, it's a weak 5, whereas most of your work is five-plus. Looking forward to the rest of the series.

-St.Vincent

dgfergiedgfergie12 days ago

pretty good so far, just waiting for the ax to fall.....................

VeracityHeterodyneVeracityHeterodyne12 days ago

Enjoying it. Hard to wait for the next chapter. I would have gladly read it all at once. But, why didn't they have a dance partner for the main character?

njlaurennjlauren12 days ago

So the mom is straight forward yet we don't hear what it was as the readers, and he with whatever she said is dumb enough to drink the punch and get drugged. In the intro you ask where this should go, I dont know why, the only place this can go is LW. Even assuming she and Jon didn't fuck, drugging Rob should have him head for home and tell her to fuck off. He should have brought his old friend Steve carter with him to take out Jon.

I have to agree with others, if a story is written, why submit it in pieces? This was 3 pages, so wouldn't be over long.

Boyd PercyBoyd Percy12 days ago

Good beginning!

4

irinmikeirinmike12 days ago

So he blanked out after drinking spiked rum at the fuck party and the next thing he is aware of is he is in bed. WHO carried him from the fuck fest to his bed? A fight is obviously on the horizon. Mel is caught between her family and western culture. I don’t think she can fuck her way out of this one with her husband.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Hopefully, the next two parts won’t be as boring as the first. The backstory was WAY too long. Especially after you spent hundreds of words setting up the story in your prologue. 2*

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Where is the end?

AA82ndAAAA82ndAA11 days ago

The story has produced outrage in me. First she betrayed him as his wife. Second his "friend' Jon betrayed him. Third they drugged him for Christ's sake. Finally he is a weak person who I bet will slink away...although I do not know what else he can do. I hope there's at least one more chapter and will wait for that to grade the story till I read the ending.

BSreaderBSreader11 days ago
Another

Wimpy cuckold story

WargamerWargamer11 days ago

What the hell?????

And……..?????

I hope there is more to come, you cannot leave it there, surely?

Was he drugged, was she fucked, was he cucked?

If so, where to next?

This stays at 2/5 until l know. Unfinished stories with me, are always punished.

WargamerWargamer11 days ago

Apologies l missed the last para of your intro, two more parts to come.

Revised my score to 3/5 proper score at the end.

buzzsawlennybuzzsawlenny11 days ago

Yeah get off that island...never return...maybe burn down their little vacation home on the way out. Let it be known she is not expected to return

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

There IS more coming, right?

ReadyOneReadyOne11 days ago

The story you may have remembered that involved a ritual, an island, and a volcano could be "A Time To Cheat" by saddletramp1956. https://www.literotica.com/s/a-time-to-cheat Try selecting the previous then right click / search.

Happily_Married87Happily_Married8711 days ago

Do you plan on finishing this story?

ReadyOneReadyOne11 days ago

Sorry, I meant to say Highlight the URL, then right click / open (based on your browser).

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

At this point it feels like it should be in "betrayal"...

sbrooks103xsbrooks103x11 days ago

While I agree that the Chapter 1 should have been in the title, the intro DOES say that there are parts, do lighten up!

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

INTERESTING PLACE TO STOP THE FIRST CHAPTER. IT'S THE EQUIVALENT OF KNOCKING "SHAVE AND A HAIRCUT, TWO..."

Leaves a strong desire to resolve without resolution.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Hopefully the next chapter will be better. It certainly can't rate any lower than the 1* this chapter earned.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Nice try - just around about way wife goes on a date. And MC is a sap.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

I think you made a vague reference to a story named the "Archipelago" which now only exists as the first chapter on this site. I suspect the author was asked to remove the remaining chapters as it was a bit extreme, but a very good read. This story will hopefully add a few chapters.

DeanofMeanDeanofMean11 days ago

Tough to rate it, this much well written. Though interesting characters even if i do not understand WTF he is still there looking forward to the rest might poke around a few of you other stories

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

So why get married? Why stay married? Just end it and get a life.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

About 60% off the background about the protector friends was not only unnecessary but also boring. Also how stupid is this guy?

RosenkavalierRosenkavalier11 days ago

Well written!

But:

You offend some readers (I am sure that I am not the only one who dislikes being put on hold) by breaking up a story into fragments in order to achieve a larger number of stories. Or is it that science suggests that this assures a higher rating - if yes, I would like to see such research.

Second thing is the description of the male main character as someone who seems to avoid conflict at any cost. This fits with his character in early youth, but not with the character he became after the big fight.

Third thing is the information he gets from his mother in law. You write that she answers every question so that he refrains from asking his sister in law because he has all the answers. But you never tell what she said and the story suggests that he did not see the whole picture. Was your intention to depict the protagonist as a very stupid person? If yes, then this would contradict how you describe him. If it was only a means to increase tension or divert the reader, then this failed.

My conclusion:

You write well and I enjoy reading your stories. I would enjoy this story even more without the flaws described above and if it would be posted in one piece.

Thank you very much for sharing with us!

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Yeah, no. I would have been on the next flight out.

There are WAY TOO MANY other women in the world to put up with even ONE SECOND of this shit.

sf_operative63sf_operative6311 days ago

Hopefuuly, he gets a bigger spine and gets some deep revenge.

DOL

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

Stories that use ridiculously transparent, implausible plot devices to extend a story get a 1. The minute Mel makes it clear that she got her husband there under false pretenses so she could be the star of a primitive fertility ritual and be " betrothed" to the husband's former friend is the minute any remotely normal man tells her that the marriage is over and he's leaving. Bear in mind the earlier public sex scene in which a couple had an audience in which you could construe the fucking as dance-like. There is also the question of what went on on the prior visit and the real reason for the extension of the trip and her behavior on returning. Instead, the author brings out the LW Cuck Ray to as an absurd artifice to prolong the story. That is bad writing. The only remotely plausible response is for the husband to leave immediately, unless the husband had been written earlier in the story as having cuckish tendencies.

JBird11JBird1111 days ago

Chapter 2 showing he burns the village down. A little disjointed for my taste. Thanks for sharing.

Just_WordsJust_Words11 days ago

No excuse. Divorce her.

WhoGivesAShitWhoGivesAShit11 days ago

He should have left the island, the moment she called Jon her destiny. She clearly planned the trip for this celebration, and had him travel with her. That’s a huge WTF! moment.

CockatooCockatoo11 days ago

Where's the rest of it?

RanDog025RanDog02511 days ago

No indication to the reader whether or not this is one of those cliff hangers with the suspect, "What will happen in the next episode of @*****@" or if this were one of the abrupt endings no one likes? Guess I'll wait and see if there is a continuance, then score it! I got my eye n you Cooking with Gas!

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

That was silly. I just read it because I normally appreciate this author's work. But this was really awful.

AnonymousAnonymous11 days ago

A serious waste of time for a piece of crap.

Ridiculous69Ridiculous6911 days ago

Really? You had a good story until you made hubby a fool at the end. He was portrayed as much smarter and wouldn’t have taken their offer to drink something that he didn’t know what was in it. He knew that his wife was going to go with another man but you just had him become stupid. Ugh

EastCoaster1EastCoaster111 days ago

Did you forget the rest of this ? Your preface made it sound like there would be some very hot sex... where? When ?

Between which people ?

Sorry, but only 2 stars, and that's being generous. Maybe if you finish the story the rest will earn more and a better review... maybe.

cyendreycyendrey11 days ago

Why did hubby become a low grade moron at tge “end” and where is the rext of this obviously unfinished story?

AnonymousAnonymous10 days ago
You were drugged you poor bastard!

What does that tell you about your loving wife?

Get the hell away while you can, you dumb bastard!

MasterJerryGMasterJerryG10 days ago

Far from your best, part 2? Let's hope for more.

GardenshedGardenshed10 days ago

Well nothing good will come of this. Rob is drugged and Mel is not there? Maybe it’s time for Rob to reenact Apocalypse Now? Start the killing with Jon first then Mel? Lol…..

Super well written, looking forward to the next installment! Thanks for sharing.

5⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

12
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usercookingwithgas@cookingwithgas
Romance novelist, under pen name K.L. Denison. You can follow me on Amazon, KDP and coming soon on SmashWords Like writing and posting free stories for others' enjoyment - often just to clear a writer's block. Real life can be pretty boring, so I strive to avoid the common ...

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