All Comments on 'Betrayed'

That was great. You sure know how to keep it convincing.

And I'm gad it didn't turn into another "cheating slut-wife" story - almost an "O'Henry" ending, and very well done, up to your usual standards, keep it up!

Don't explain the lack of sex between the couples . My guess is that they are still fucking around .

that Sis knew all along and used the story to intrigue her brother? Well done. Very enjoyable.

Great cover story! Use Mom & Dad as a "surprise" at the old no-tell hotel! No one will suspect a thing!

Technically speaking, it was only speculation, regardless of whether they were cheating or not; So while it's all open for debate over did they or didn't they, I honestly think they didn't and they used the lipstick covered collar as a trigger object to set them up into thinking that Cat's husband and Jack's wife were cheating in order to set up the plans for the parents. Why they would do said plans in a motel is beyond me but that's just my take on it as well as my humble opinion. As for the story, well crafted... 4 stars

gut geschrieben, sehr erregend, ein überraschendes Ende. Ich sage: diese Geschichte ist besser als gut!

Übersetzung:

Good idea, well written, very arousing, an unexpected finish. I tell you: this story is better than good!

Thanks for sharing this very entertaining story. Looking forward to your next submission.

Interesting twist! Very well written, hot sex scenes. Good job!

But could there be more???

;-)

Cheers!

That's all!

Surely there's no going back now?

I wonder how many readers, myself included, jumped to the wrong conclusion.

That was a super innovative story. Congrats.

hope the spouses don't find out what happen

to not think that refraining from normal sexual relations without REAL GOOD reasons isn't going to negatively impact their marriage...

Smoke and fire and all that... their spouses had no real reason to not still be loving and yet they weren't... I don't buy it.

If all they're doing is arranging a birthday surprise in a motel room, why cut their partners off for months? I don't buy it, it makes no sense. Either write a sequel where the partners are having an affair, or re-write and delete the whole inexplicable business about not letting their husband and wife touch them for months. Unfinished stories like this are just clutter on this site.

that the parents were in the motel room for a month? or more?

NOT!

Not the ending I expected but loved it all the same. Perhaps a second chapter that follows the brother/sister relationship after the surprise?

great story and ending. yes, it's a little weird with the timeline and all, but a story is a story and this was hot. a follow-up chapter to the next chapter of the twins is definitely in order...maybe even including their spouses in a foursome. hmmmm.

WOW! Here I thought I'd written a Pulitzer-Prize winning story. Thanks for setting me straight! And look, you've learned how to use your caps-lock key too. KUDOS!!! Your parents must be so proud.

That was the way my wife treated me. The didderence was I had to work 2 to3 jobs to support her life. She always told me how she did not enjoy sex, and I was to big and hurt her, It was not my cock but her gang bangs that messed her up, along as her girlfriends with their 12+" strap ons. After 45 years of marriage I got sick and was home when some of her girlfriends and her sister came over. She brought me in some pills and one looked strange so i spit it out. It was a sleeping pill, I heard her tell the girls to wait 30 min and I woud be out. O the things I heard.

I liked the story.

Both spouses cutting them off from sex for weeks? If Angie isn't cheating, she's ready to leave, based on her reaction to his desire for her, and again, later, when she pulls away from his touch in bed. Bill and Angie may not be doing each other, but it's likely he is stepping out. Them bringing in the parents is nice, but it's also a cover for other things. Believable and even if the tale is over, there more to that story.

Five Stars!

loved it. thank you.

Good Job, loved it, thought the ending was just perfect, a real twist. Who says the lipstick wasn't their Mums, from a welcome hug. Plausible, probable, I'd buy it.

Parents there for a month, could be, say they traveled from coast to coast, you wouldn't do it for a weekend, maybe they had some business lined up or were using it as a base for days out. All plausible. Ignore the doubters, it gets my vote.

Definitely deserves another chapter or two. What happens to the siblings? what happens if the spouses find out?

Keep it going.

Doesn't work because of the way the wife is treating her husband. Way too nasty to be a happy ending setup.

Cuckold wimp tendency in the making

5 Stars

Te question still remains why neither one had sex with their spouse--I still say they were banging each other

Why should the wife not give it up if there was nothing going on between her and brother-in-law.

Hope the brother and sister "get it on more" if the spouses do not bang them

Love the story. Made all the better by the sting in the tail.

What's with this "ropes of cum" that it seems everyone who writes on this site has picked on and started using. When a man is excited, his cum is very liquid. There's nothing "ropey" about it. It's ridiculous. Jez people.

The old fart

I would want to read about the two continuing their adventures and the spouses getting it on.

Nice work. Loved the ending.

Yeah, I still say their spouses were fucking each other behind their backs! Too coincidental that they both stopped putting out for their other halves at the same time. For a while freaking month! Too tired to fuck in your twenties?! Not!! Rofl!

Besides, how long does it take to arrange travel and lodging for a couple, an hour? Tops? Rofl. They certainly didn't need to keep getting together in person to do any of that, rofl! Best keep fucking your brother sis!! Heh :)

Loved the story, thanks for sharing!!

This epic very short story is absolutely a very unique, thrilling in theme, scheme, plot and soothing tale of brother and sister incestuous romance, long time in happening love! Jack and his older sister Cat are driven in their romance, by conniving--possibly on purpose--by Jack's sexually "cold" wife, Angie and his sister Cat's carousing husband, Bill Sr.

Brother-in-law Bill and sister-in-law Angie have a suspected (by brother Jack and his sister, Catherine) affair, after they both have cut their spouses (Cat and her brother, Jack) off from any sex with their respective spouses, for for a duration of approximately a month or so. Brother Jack and sister Cat "discover" their spouses late night tete-a-tete, thus beginning a beautiful brotherly and sisterly incestuous affair, discovering their own unearthed love and affection for each other.

As previously mentioned the story is rather short; more time should have been devoted to siblings Jack and Cat exploring and professing their own deepening incestuous love, romance affair. The writer has a great writing style, his character's roles are top notch, and the sibling's consummated and awakened sexual need for each other is very well orchestrated!! More stories from him in the same vein would be welcomed, and greatly appreciated by this reader...and others I presume.

This is a perfect story because it is really plausible and added up on every level. Sister is all business- she wants validation and revenge; brother is sold on the spouses cheating and then his sister’s sex appeal, and they are both hurt and horny enough (from cheating and neglect) to want it to happen. The sex was very real too and seemed like it would actually happen like that - even the lipstick on spouse’s collar is explained by the parent visit. I agree with others - there should be a part 2. Perhaps some time passes without a repeat and neither can be satisfied and need more....

Good concept, the execution was lacking however. Way too many easy coincidences and things left unexplained. Why were the parents there for four days already? Two weeks of travel planning and they still got there four days early? Of course the biggest mystery remains why their spouses haven't wanted to have sex in almost a month.

Very hot...5 stars

Would like a few answers to Illwind"s questions. Also, where did Bill"s lipstick on the collar come from? And why the disgust on Angie's face? Disgust for Jack?

Sure its plausible Bill and Angie were innocent of cheating on Cat and Jack,and actually setting up the Birthday Surprise for them,but like that doesn't explain why Bill and Angie just cut off their spouses for sex.Did they really cheat,signs point to yes with the avoidance,lack of cuddling,and just suspiciousness with everything.

Now even if Angie and Bill didn't cheat,which I think they did,I think Jack and Cat were totally justified in cheating because their Spouses didn't love them enough to be with them.Also the author needs to write another chapter to clear up the confusion.

Finally if Bill and Angie are guilty then SHIT YEAH! both Cat and Jack should divorce their spouses asses,and go ahead and have a Incestuous Relationship since they both love eachother,thats my two cents.

Good story and I agree with some of the others, why their spouses cut them off from having sex.

Besides all the comments another thing didn't add up, why bring mom and dad to a hotel for three weeks just to surprise them? Why not fly them in, around the time of the party.

Things don't add up here.

- 3 weeks for parents and spouses to set up something

- denial of sex

- disgust of his wife for him

Not sure why the author didn't answer some of the comments but it reads like they are cheating and even used the parents as a backup.

Pretty easy to see where it was going.

Needed a little mor suspense .

Too many holes! A lot of misdirection in the beginning.

I agree with @RodimusMike, Things don’t add up.

Oops! Interesting premise, succinctly developed- where do the siblings go from there?

I figured it out about half way though, but it was still fun.

Bill S.

Par for the COURSE (as in golf course) not for the coarse, Blaster. But a nice story.

Good premise, shitty execution. You mentioned lipstick on the collar. You ending didn’t account for that.

Kind of bizarre. Just an excuse for an incest story I guess. If there's one thing worse than a bad writer, it's a dishonest writer. It's kind of like you're cheating on your readers. And as opposed to you people who live here in la la land, in the real world a cheat is evil and worthy of all Revenge. Even if they are writer. Hope you get your karma.

Awesome. What is everyone whining about? Haven't you ever read a book or watched a movie with an odd interesting twist or two... However when they were supposed to meet in the same hotel for their birthdays, you could see what was coming!

The lipstick stain could have been from the mother, but both spouses withholding intimate physical contact with an attitude is a whole other thing. Money issues, intimacy issues, and sexual issues break up marriages! More than 50% divorce rate in the U.S.

Many comments are quite sad. The story is funny and sexy. Sure this is incest but we know it before starting isn't ? Not very clear why spouses refuse sex but this is the reason why sibling have an affair. So lets not mind too much and get bonner 😉. Thanks.