exlporing bdsm online

I tried to post this once and it dissapeared without a trace so i will make this somewhat shorter (too lazy to type it all again!!)

i am in a perfectly happy relationship, both of us are fairly experienced / knowledgeable about bdsm; however one area i am not experienced in is my minds reactiosn to the dom/sub aspects of bdsm.

we role play a little in our relationship but neither of us think of ourselves as identifying as dom or sub. I identify as Bisexual and also as a 'pervert' for want of a better phrase but i do not really identify as a BDSMer (yet)

i would really like to explore this aspect of my own personality and sexuality but when playing with my partner i find it very hard to 'swtich off' fromt eh fact that this is the person i love and care for. maybe this is something that will come with time but at the moment i am trying to concentrate on what turns me on- how do i respond to dom/sub roles and situaitons.

I never though of myself as particulary sub - to be honest alot of the subs online make me feel a bit wierd - i don't like the idea of being a collared sub or being 'owned' in any way however i do find that cybering and fanatsising more and more i am thinking about being sub.

i am seeking play partenrs on line to help me explore this element of myself and other things to do with bdsm - i would like your help - how do i approach people? has anyone any tips or experiences that might help me out?

Chat-rooms

that spontaneously popped into my mind while/after reading your post. there are millions of BDSM-oriented chat rooms ( I can't name one but I know others here will be able to help you out for sure) where you can just be whoever you want to be - someone different each day if you like, exploring all forms and sides of BDSM with various partners.

For me they are like huge buffets and if you take some time to look around you may find the exactly right selection of "mind food" to let you explore yourself without getting too attached to anyone outside your relation.

Those chat rooms are so different and diverse so that I can't give you any general hints as how to get started, but with a basic general dose of polite and respectfull behaviour you can't really go wrong.

Good luck on your discovery *S*

Chat rooms work.. but so do personal ads... and with the advent of AIM you can get more personal.

PBW