by MickNasty
The rhyme certainly isn't overpowering. It's subtle and that really works in the poem's favor. There are some very good lines. Overall, the poem is really good. I've already said that you have potential. I think your poetry will keep getting better.
in which I didn't mind the rhyme at all. It gives the piece a certain grace. Besides, it's a really fun piece. Nicely done.