All Comments on 'Mozzarella Death'

There's some very creative, stirring imagery here: tying all of the (nailed it!) hedonist treasures together with fixations on pleasures of the flesh and fantasies of a city of women --- it's male as male without being really ashamed of it, and I think that's sort of brave these days. <p>I have but one suggestion: I think by "three stools" you're trying to intimate three LEGS of the same stool, yes? "Stools" is a not-so-great word choice on its own (unless the speaker really does consider sleep, food and sex as ... well, you know what ... and I don't think that's what you meant, I could be wrong). <p> I see you beginning to work your way into a poet's body here, T, I really do. Keep writing: Everything you do is interesting, if not always quite poetic.

This is a wonderful poem with a great sustained theme and pace. I agree with WomanPariah about the use of "stools" and there are some other language glitches that could be fixed. Nothing that mars the overall quality of your poem though. I really enjoy reading you. Your poem has been recommended in the New Poems Review thread on Literotica's Poetry Feedback and Discussion forum. Thanks for the read! :-)

I like the style you chose here of narrating the sensual history of your life and your fantacies. BTW - a big fan of Fellini myself; he is the big master of visual imagery -no doubt.

and it's a real nice piece of erotics. it's not of the typical type ....don