Not a Word

You've not said a word to me,
but with every breath you take,
I hear everything you say.

A little, embarrassed smile,
my skin, neck to forehead, gone crimson,
and never will I utter transparent words, again -
but I know with all my very being
that you too, listen with passion
to the things inside my head
and share those days I spent
rapturous, lingering, desiring -
all the nights I spent
scheming in vehemence
about how to prove I mean more
than every fucking one of them.

Stilled, afterglow, alone,
chilled tears like wine flow
offer a taste of bittersweet...

I'm never alone,
but you're never here.

I'll forever listen, tune in,
write it all down,
glimpse Heaven on the verge of suicide,
while you are preened and coddled,
but hiding, until it's time
for the tears to sell you,
and sell all I wish was mine.

And forever, on display
from my head's movie reel,
you... just you, up there -

You turned away,
made certain the black gloss
was delicately cradled in its stand,

and not another word

not another word

not another word...