All Comments on 'A Beautiful Wish Ch. 01'

I enjoyed your story, as well as it's prologue. It is a good successor to the genie chronicles that have never been finished, much to my annoyance. I look forward to the next chapters eagerly.

A truly well written start I look forward to read more of Dawn and George's story

Very good, can't wait till the next chapter.

I think it is a great story in that universe. But it is also a wonderful stand alone story. Please continue.

Thank You

madams73

many little things give you away as a novice at writing but potential is evident as well. story starts off far too similar to joe brolly's.

Obviously Joe Brolly had a strong influence in the writing of this story. Not a problem as his Genie Chronicles are one of the best story series I've ever read and I'm still waiting for him to continue. But I shall be watching this series as well, waiting for it to continue. Now, on to the rest of the story...

This is great, after just reading Genie Chronicles I was looking for a similar story, and to find this set in the same setting is perfect. Your writing is very good and I am looking forward to reading the rest of this series!

I love the insight into a young man's mind who was not appreciated nor totally accepted in the world he functioned. I loved reading about his insecurities, his intelligence, and his gentleness...all of which are not weaknesses, just part of his makeup. I love the insight into his thoughts and feelings, before, during, and after the sex.

You've done a great job with his character as I thought of him as a "real" individual I may have seen or know. As for the genie...IT IS fantasy. She's cute and alright, but I would have preferred a little MILF genie. I'm jaded. Being it's your world and I'm the peeping Tom...thank you for a job well done. I'm not much for innocence at this juncture of my sexuality, but your portrayal was spot on and sensual. Not something I could wipe my fingers for before typing, but an enjoyable read all the same. Looking forward to reading your stuff when you're matured to grown up fetishes and "kinks!" Keep the magic cumming! :-P

Let me just say, once I started readin it, I could not stop till the end... it is just great!

wow this series is the best ive read in ages. thank you so much. its better than watching porn

What great writing.

I think this chapter is one of the best erotic (and romantic) scens which I have ever read with a super tiny humor...............

While I enjoyed the chapter, and the main character, I didn't like the fact that more than 1 paragraph was copied word for word from brolly's story, and that the storyline hasn't really changed. That being said, the main character made me interested.

bet the 800lb gorilla in the room IS that the same author wrote this story, as well.

The style is too similar, but it is idiosyncrasies that give it away; the first being the unusual habit of starting with a Chapter 00.

This story has the same feel as the GC, it delves into the emotions of the protagonist in the same manner, with the same empathy.

The timing of the posting overlaps, and Joe Brolly makes a reference to spinoffs in the comments in his bio. Also, JB was getting a lot of pressure to perform, and taking longer and longer to post new chapters in the end.

I can see him wanting to ditch the pressure and just write; the end result being this spinoff. Which he also just kind of fades away on, at the end, as commenters noted at the end of Ch 00.

I am falling in love with these characters. As much as I love the original story this one, for me, is starting to blow it out of the water. Great job!

I would favorite this story too, but I have a thing against favoriting every story in a series and I have a feeling that would come up with this series.

You are a writing deity. Keep it up. :-)

DJ

And you know what that means

JC

I wonder if a Genies age is matched with her Masters age?? I'm 57, so would my Genie be a MILF or GILF??

Awesome story thus far and I can't wait to read more!

While I'm positive it will come up in the next chapter or two, I think I might have started things off with "A friend of mine was sexually assaulted last night and I'm afraid she's at risk of it happening again, likely worse this time. I wish that she be protected from such sexual harm and that I might help her get past the event and heal, both psychologically and emotionally..." Then go ahead with everything exactly as you wrote it. But that's just me and this is your story.

lol it just seemed that Friday night might be pretty risky for Karen given Ass-hat's comments in the locker room that afternoon about his plans for the weekend.

An amazing chapter 1. Similar in many ways to Joe Brolly's genie story but this feels more natural, more loving and intimate. Very little cringing or eye rolling so far for me, I hope it stays that way!

Won't remember them all if I take the time to read the whole thing; however, a few small mistakes here-&-there, but overall decent.

The only one that's stuck in my mind is describing him as face-to-face with something other than her face.

I have found story, full of great erotica, but with an outstanding mix of sex, love, and pain. Unexpected in this genre, a promising, fascinating, a really, really good read that needs a sequel now! A weaving of young love, magic, pain, sex, and a genie no less! Absolutely recommended! I will try the authors other books in the hope of finding something as well written.