tagGay MaleA Change of Heart

A Change of Heart

bycyravance©

It was only after I had fucked him senseless that I remembered why it was that he seemed familiar. I had seen the boy before, the night before in fact, at that little club by the docks. He had stood, slim and blonde and heartbreakingly beautiful, with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, at the entrance when I had gone in. I had only glanced at him as I passed, even in the poor light it was easy to see he was young, much younger than the guys I usually looked twice at. But, he was a looker, so I looked back.

I quickly forgot all about him as I mixed and mingled and socialized. I didn't meet anyone interesting that night, but I still had a very good time. I went home, alone, and right to sleep. I was supposed to meet with some friends tomorrow night at Sally's. Sally's was a good place to hook up, if that's what you were into.

I wasn't sure if I was, though. I had been giving this a good deal of thought lately, and had come to some surprising conclusions. The biggest, and most surprising to me, was that quick and easy sex just wasn't doing it for me anymore. Sure, it could be hot and intense, but I had noticed a certain empty feeling afterwards that I had never felt before. Not just the usual post-coital blues you sometimes felt, but a real, tangible feeling that made me wonder if I was getting depressed or something. Maybe I needed to see a doctor.

But another part of me realized that this wasn't something that was going to be cured with the swallowing of a pill. I needed someone. And not just in a sexual way. I needed someone to be there when I got home, to know that if I should fail to arrive, that someone would miss me. I needed someone to sit beside me at night, and to be comfortable saying absolutely nothing, just to be there. I needed to have a reason to come home, instead of cruising about all night. I wanted to be in love.

I knew that wasn't likely given my preference for gay men's clubs. Sure, I'd find someone attractive, hook up, maybe even stay together for awhile, but eventually the thrill would fade, and we'd go our separate ways. Then, back to square one.

So, when I went to Sally's that night, I wasn't bringing any expectations with me. I had made peace with the fact that I was probably going to become one of those old, tragic fags that lives alone and has a cat or two. And my sweet white-haired old landlady would never suspect that the nice man who lives downstairs occasionally brought other men home later in the evening, men who would stay the night and engage in the sorts of practices that would send her reaching for her tiny bottle of nitro.

"How old are you?" I asked. If I had to guess, I'd have said 16, 17 or so. Definitely not of age. But he vehemently denied that.

"No, no!" he said. "I'm 21, gonna be 22 next month." I decided to reserve judgment on that. "Hey," he said, "I know I look young, but I swear I'm not some kind of jailbait." I looked him over thoroughly. Damn, he was cute! Slender and blonde, with big blue eyes and the kind of lashes that women would KILL for, full, very kissable lips and a head of curly blonde hair that just begged for you to push your fingers into it and grab hold. He would probably look a bit older if he got some of that cut off, but I certainly wouldn't be the one to suggest it. I decided to play along.

"Listen, I'm probably almost old enough to be your Dad."

He told me that he was a college student, taking business classes, and was chronically short of cash. A friend of his had answered an ad for "models wanted", and had gotten paid quite well for jerking off in front of a camera. The following week he had gotten even more for allowing a fellow model, male, to suck his dick, and more still for returning the favor. But evidently the big money was in taking a dick up the ass. He had decided to give it a try, and had gone through the solo jerk-off to blow-job getter to blow-job giver and was now ready to cross the Rubicon and take one up the ass for the team. The price was 900 dollars. He had agreed.

His appointment was for tomorrow. He said he had been hanging out at gay clubs for a few nights, trying to drum up the courage to approach someone. He figured if he tried anal on his own terms first, he would be better able to handle it when the cameras were rolling. He also wanted to know how bad it was gonna be, and to know beforehand if he could take it or not.

His face was serious. "I need that money." he said. "I have to do this, I just want to have an idea of how bad it's gonna be. I can take it, but I just want to know ahead of time." He looked down into his lap and fiddled with the edge of his sweatshirt. "So, what do you say?".

What DID I say? I was being propositioned by a kid nearly half my age, and what he was really asking me to do was to prep him for an anal porn shoot. It didn't sit right with me. I love porn, but had always assumed the guys were just into that. But, here is this kid, and he is telling me that he is going to give up his cherry to make a few hundred bucks?

"You know, your first time should be with someone you at least care about, don't you think?" I had the fleeting feeling of being a parent, I wanted to grab this kid and just slap some sense into him.

"You're right, but it ain't like I'm gonna be with guys after this, you know? It's just for now. For the money." He said this with all the air of a 21 year old who has discovered the secret to happiness.

"What, McDonald's isn't hiring?" I wasn't really trying to sound cruel, but it came out that way. He looked down.

"Yeah, well Mickey D's doesn't pay the same, know what I mean?"

"Yeah, and what happens when someone you know finds you online with a dick in your ass? Are you prepared for that?" His smile faded, I knew he really hadn't thought of that. Just like a 21 year old.

"Listen man, I don't really have a choice at this point, know what I mean? If somebody sees it, they see it. What can I do? Besides, what do you care? What are you, my mother or something?" Out came the 21 year old defenses and smart talk. And, I'm sorry to admit, out came my internal predator.

This kid was gonna fuck somebody, that's what he came here for. So, why not me? I was horny, he was available and willing. And fucking gorgeous! If this little lambchop was going to get his tight little ass reamed, why not by me?

I decided that I was going to pick him up. We talked a bit more, I bought him a few drinks, then suggested we go back to my place. He accepted.

I leaned in and kissed him. His lips parted and I pushed my tongue past them. I grabbed his hair and pressed him against me. He kissed back, and I knew that at least he wasn't going to lie there like so many did. He curled his arm around my neck and pulled me close.

We kissed like that for awhile, and I ran my hand over his flat chest, down past his belly, and slipped my fingers into the waistband of his jeans. His cock, hard already, was pressing with insistence against his zipper, and I freed it. Wrapping my hand around him, I stroked him up and down. He moaned softly and pressed back against me. I slipped his jeans around his narrow hips and tossed them, followed quickly by his underwear, then my own. I moved my head down between his legs and took his cock in my mouth, working it with my tongue and lips. He reached down and placed his hand on the back of my head, as if he were afraid I'd stop. I sucked him a few minutes, felt him harden further, then ran my tongue up his belly. I stopped at each tiny pink nipple and kissed them. He was making soft noises, little murmurings as I rose back up to meet his mouth. I moved my lips over his, his face, his neck, he lay his head back, eyes closed, as I kissed him. After a few minutes I whispered hoarsely in his ear, "You ready?" He sighed and said simply, "Yeah.".

I squeezed some lube onto my fingers and slid my hand along the cleft of his ass, pressing my finger in. His opening was as tight and small as a Cheerio, and he caught his breath and tensed as I probed him there. I pulled back and looked him in the face.

"You're nervous about my finger, and you were considering taking a dick in your ass?"

I worked the lube in and around his tight little asshole, pushing it in with my fingertip. He clenched tightly around me, and I knew it was going to take a little while to get him ready. But no matter, I had plenty of time. I played with the kids ass for awhile, and eventually was able to slide three fingers in without any trouble. He moaned and thrashed against my hand, his cock was hard as rock. He was as ready as he was ever going to be. So, I positioned him beneath me and spread his legs wide. He held his breath, and I reminded him to breath. As I pressed the head of my cock against his tight little hole, I felt initial resistance, then as he breathed and relaxed, he opened up beneath me and I pushed in.

Hot, wet velvet. Heaven! He gasped, and his ass tightened around me momentarily, then relaxed and I began to fuck him, slow and deep. He sighed and murmured, "Oh God, yes!" His little ring of muscle gripped me as I pushed in and back out over and over again. His cock, like iron in my fist, began to leak pre-cum as I fucked him.

I pulled free and turned him over onto his back. I wanted to watch his face as I fucked him. He threw his head back, eyes closed, mouth open as I rode him missionary style. Then together we looked down and watched as my cock slid in and out of his ass effortlessly. He curled his legs around me and pulled me closer, whispering, "Oh yeah, fuck me, fuck me..." His breathing became ragged, and his slender hips bucked up against me. His head fell back, eyes closed, panting as he came. His cock spurted onto his belly. Milky drops of cum lay on his skin like strands of pearls. I licked them off, and rose to meet his mouth again. Our tongues played with the cum.

I still hadn't come yet, and I again began to thrust within his ass. He curled his legs around my hips and I rode him until I finally spent myself deep inside him. "Oh my God," I whispered into his neck. "So beautiful..." He lie still beneath me, catching his breath. I drew back and looked him in the face. "And you wanted to do this on camera for some jerk for money?" I asked incredulously. He said nothing, just curled his arms around me and pulled me close. I kissed him again, then lay back and closed my eyes for a few minutes. When I opened them again, he lay asleep, his face like an angels. His breath rose and fell softly, and unable to help myself, I planted light kisses on his lips, his cheeks, his eyelids. He stirred briefly, and I drew back, not wanting to wake him. I watched him sleep for awhile, then curling my arm around him, I too, slept.

When I woke next morning, he was gone. But not far, I discovered. He was in the kitchen, making breakfast. Coffee was already made. "Oh, good morning!" he chirped.

"Hey, what are you doing?" I strode groggily into the kitchen and sat down at the table, which had already been set for two. He placed a mug of coffee in front of me.

"Making breakfast." he said simply. "I have to go soon, wanted to make sure you ate before I left." He moved about the kitchen busily. I watched him for a minute.

"So, how do you feel?" I asked. He smiled and turned to me.

"Pretty good. Pretty fucking good." He plated the eggs and bacon and placed it in front of me, then his own, and he sat with me at the table. He took a couple of bites, then asked me, "Will you be home later? Is it all right if I come by?" I looked at him. Of course it was ok, more than ok, it might even give me a reason to come home tonight.

"I'd like that. A lot." I said. Then I asked him the question that was on my mind.

"Are you going over there?" Over there was 900 dollars waiting, and here was a boy who had bills to pay. His answer was awhile in coming.

"I don't think so." he said finally. "I mean, McDonald's is hiring, aren't they?"

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