by andros14
Just curious why this story is listed in the Lesbian Sex Series?
Kind of short, but very sweet. :) as for the comment above.......you have obviously never seen or felt a wet pussy in ur life.
I keep reading about dripping pussies. If I was ready to put my dick in a dripping pussy, virgin or not, you can bet I'd immediately think of the term VD. With this in mind and I'd dress and head out of town.
I prefer hairy pussies and no condoms. Otherwise I liked the story.
It was intersting of the circumstances leading to your first time, even though the story was plainly simple and to the point quickly, without much foreplay and description.
It seems to ne the first time you've written an erotic story, and with prctice and polishing you can get good at it. Like having more sex leads to more experience.
I was a bit envious of your ages however, as I did not have my first experience until I was "old" at the age of 29...
The story was of true innocent sex, but there was so much that we the reader could not see or feel. What you look like what he looked like, was it a newer room or some old room that smelled like stale cigars. As a reader I want to feel like I am there watching the event. I thank you for sharing and I respect you for going “outside the lines.” I think as you write more you will get better, good luck.
A nice realistic story....a bit on the short side,but basically the emotions,hesitations are correct..why throw the condom in trash can,instead of the WC? otherwise,very good..i prefer true stories.....
Yeah, it could have been expanded on. It seamed a little rushed. Try slowing it down by showing more detail.
Hi, since you so clearly asked for feedback... I really love reading true stories, especially of first time experiences. Your story is touching, because it is real, but it does not build, rather it goes too quickly into the 'action' and then the action itself is not described much.
You could have described more about your relationship before, like how close you had felt, how much you had wanted to go the final step, but held back using excuses - now though you had no excuses left. How did it feel being with the police? What about the excitement you felt as you realised you were going to have to stay at Days Inn, and the police were arguing to get you in bed together!
Then the action could be longer with more with more description about how you felt, the tingling and anticipation, your nipples going hard, the goose bumps as he dragged his finger nails over your stomach, the involutary swelling and lubrication of your pussy even as you still had some fear, your relief that Brandon got a condom even as you wished you could do it without.
In short, a great short story that would have been better twice as long!
Best wishes,
Tim Lee
timplee@gmail.com
I guess everyone is different, but my first time was loving and romantic also..until it was terribly painful. I think I really had 2 first times, because I made him stop before he could get past my hymen because that pain was so intense. I can't imagine actually being able to have an orgasm, so kudos to you for getting it perfect the first time out.
It was great. I didn't know first times could be like that. Its better than many of the first time stories I've read on here. I liked it a lot.
I haven't had my first yet,waiting till marriage.With stories like this,the waiting become more difficult.
It's a bit different from how my first time happened, but similar age, and my gf at the time was wanting me as much as I wanted her. The condom was there, ready in case... but not having just come through a wreck, we were shaking enough that first time anyway. The nice part for us was not only did we fall asleep in each other's arms, we woke up there and made sure we had it right.
if this is your first story about your first time it was really good. Not only are you hot, but intelligent to boot! Looking forward to reading the rest of your stories. Keep up the good work.
I'm a sape for romantic stories yours was truly amazing. Your a great writer.
Would have loved to be in Brandon's shoes that day ... or rather out of them ... as long as I had been with her!
living close to st. marys it kinda sends the story home, nicely wrote, hope it was worth it,
loved your story very much.alot like my real first time only a little younger than you.keep up the writing.true stories of course. had a hard on from the get go.
i gave it a 4 because like our lives it is awork in progress and who knows how it will end!
Enjoyed it very much. It was sensitive and real. It made me hard, and now I will probably masturbate. Thanks.
It is a very good descriptive story. I liked it. Hope you keep on writing!
It was pretty believeable, actually...A lot different from MY personal first, but believeable, nonetheless.
One of the better "first" stories I've read, seeing as how you not only capture the physical, but the emotional needs of the two people as well.
Hope you keep writing,
Manda
just loved it and it reminded me of mine....
This sstory freminds me of our first time. Very, extraordinarily satisfying. We've been married now for 54 years.
Very nice. Enough to awaken the dieing romantic in me and wonder about the rest of there lives together, or apart.
That story came from the heart. You must really love the guy that you made love with for the first time. I enjoy reading that love still exsists and is not dead. You should write more stories about other times, I know it made me think of doing it! Loved the story, can't wait to hear more! Kisses!
Mistress Demetra
I once received some feedback from a young lady who was " researching " all the First Time stories because she wanted to know what it would be like when she " did it" ... If I could find that woman today, I would tell her to read yours. Just enough joy to make others want ( as if we didn't need a good reason) to do it, but just enough fear to keep the story honest.
Thank You for sharing .... but please don't stop there.
I wish for all of those who wish to down grade someones writing be correct in their standing. I rated this one a 5 and loved it! If you don't like reading what we write go away, far, far away.
pretty hot. im surprised at something though.. it didnt hurt the first time you had sex?
I enjoyed reading your story, it was real and had a feeling of innocence about it that really turned me on and made me cum. - Dana
I enjoyed this very much, I always enjoy hearing about women and their first time. For your first effort it was very good. Looking forward to your other stories.
I can not understand why 99% of writers concentrate so much
on oral sex, when 99% of people dont use it and dont like it.
Great story but would have liked it a wee bit slower and with a bit more romance.
Somehow Girls (I am a Guy) make the best authors.
Great stuff.
Keep it up.