All Comments on 'A Neighbourly Tale'

The badly written material needs to be edited and spell checked. Stupid grade school mistakes like "neighbour" and "lounge" when the correct versions are "neighbor" and "livingroom".

...the previous commenter, had he or she the wit to notice, would have seen expressions such as "bum," "fancy a cup of coffee," and "knickers" which would have made it obvious that the author is British and is using the British spelling of neighborhood and the British term for living room.

There are some grammatical issues that an editor can help within this short stroker--run-on sentences, missing words, and incorrect punctuation (largely around dialogue).

My problem with this story is that the description is too external--what's happening isn't described in a way that the reader can feel and identify with. Where's the passion in the characters? Where's the emotion? We don't need backstory or character-building, but we have to be able to feel with the characters, and your writing doesn't accomplish this, IMO.

Thank you for capturing my imagination... you described the event in such a manner that I felt what she was feeling.. felt what he was enjoying.. thank you.

Great work keep it up, good to see you write English and not american.

Superb. Loved it.