All Comments on 'A Picture Worth a Thousand Words'

I'm sorry, it seemed like it could be a good story but I gave up about a quarter of the way through the first page. I just couldn't take the continuous changing of person from first to second to third even. Don't stop trying and get a good editor.

Sorry - I do not understand why you keep changing person context. I found the story very good but hard to read.

Great start. the plot has a lot of potential to be very hot and twisted. I gave you 5 stars for that. I do agree with the other posters in regards to to writing style AND technique.

GREAT start once I got past the changing of person from first to second to third...

Keep it coming.

Hey, thanks for the comments guys.

Looking back I do see how there can be a bit of confusion between first and third person. I had initially written it entirely in third person but thought converting it to first would have made it more personal. I was so sick of fiddling with it that I was obvious to the narrative flaw I introduced.

I also just want to clarify that second person is "You did X" or "You said Y" and there is definitely none of that in this story!

This story has the means to go in many different directions. Hope you keep it going, I would love to see where you're going with this tale.

I encourage to write your story the way you want, the scenario show a nice potential to be a wonderful story, if I have to give you an advice, it's the way to set your story to be beautiful, sex is good but if you focus only for that you will drop your story, you began well please continue in this way. Waiting for your next chapter.

just your typical literotica writer that gets the reader hooked then leaves them hanging if you aren't going to finish or are just writting for yourself then don't bother to post it if you are writting for the readers enjoyment then you had better do it right and bring it to a proper finish

this could have been good if it had been written by a GOOD WRITER using a GOOD EDITOR and if it had been finished. as is it totally sucks and needs to be deleted you wasted our time and the sites space.

You write in first person ('I') but refer to you and your sister in third person ('they').

This most basic of writing errors ruins the story.

But it's a shame you've abondoned it as obviously it hasn't been finished.

Nice story line, but unfinished. What happens at the photo shoot? or the rest of the summer and the relationship with the sister? keep trying you'll get it.

#typo: Repeated use of "they" when using Steve's POV to talk about him and his sister - should be we.