All Comments on 'A Private Arrangement Ch. 01'

As well written as possible for this type of story. I liked that the the sister was "go-between". The dialogue was written well. The "deflowering" sex scene was hot, but I was surprised she didn't feel pain of the hymen being broken. It is possible the hymen was previously torn by horseback riding, etc. but that should have been addressed. I look forward to Chapter 2. It will be interesting to see what direction you take this story. Of course, one direction is that Sis and Bro get together, but there's other directions for the story and more "sexual education" to cover.

This was a very tender and sensual story and very well written. Will there be more to this one?

I loved this story! It was very well written, but could have used some editing. There were a few words which were duplicated unnecessarily (an extra "you", for instance) and the author accidentally forgot to remove his own name from the story (yep, caught ya!), so one paragraph started with Stephen as the main character while, in the others, he was named James.

Lindsey's first time sounded like fun, but I hope that you will write another story about her second time, third time, and, eventually, James and Lindsey's ultimate decision of whether or not the relationship continues or ends. Regardless of what they decide, I'm sure that Lindsey will find enjoyment, but what about Kate. Perhaps she needs to walk in and catch the duo after coming home sloshed and just join in with the pair. But that, Stephen, is completely up to you and them, isn't it?

Keep writing!

That was a good story that you wrote. I like the way you described the sex between the uncle and the niece. It was quite erotic the way you described the the taking of her virginity in the story. I also like the way that mother asked her brother to help with this problem. A second chapter would be nice.

I agree with the others, it should be continued- it's that good. Thanks for a good read.

I hope he gets together with Kate as well as Lindsey. I'm sure that here is a hint of this in the story.

I am sure that Kate secretly wants her brother for herself as well as for her daughter. I know I always do whenever my daughter has an older "friend" at home.

of the deflowering of a willing virgin. A nice story even though I've never known a first time to go so painlessly.

Very well written and having the mother ask the man to deflower her daughter was a very nice touch! I also agree with the one comment about the first time going so painlessly, to wit: I have had the honor of deflowering five of my own daughters and three daughters from my wife's sister and I was asked to deflower each one by the mother but each girl screamed as her hymen tore open and there was also some blood that had to be handled by us! Looking forward to Chapter two of the story and working on my own Chapter Two by giving each of the daughters children and having the honor of those cherries also!

Easter is NEVER on Tuesday! It is always on a Sunday, I ought to know I was born on Easter Sunday.

Learn to use commas instead of the word and , it makes your writing smoother and more readable.

Other than those two errors, it's a good story !

"Anonymous" wrote,

"Easter is NEVER on Tuesday! It is always on a Sunday, I ought to know I was born on Easter Sunday."

True, Genius; but Easter Tuesday means the Tuesday of Easter week.

Sheesh!

What the fuck is erm? I've heard of um but not erm

Just like your bio said, your writing in the British English is way too annoying for a bloke like me. 1*