by diadactyl
That was so good , it made me feel how she was feeling. My girlfriends the same way , she wont let go either. But I truly love her and will wait.
Short but intense. Very enthralling. Keep on writing. Thanks for sharing.
I Iove how you made this kind of ironic... think about it! one of the main characters is so used to this control, things going the way SHE wants them to go, and now the person she thinks she can control, is controlling her. I loved this story; short, intense, and to the point... sigh, if only MY life could be that.
Normally I don't bother with such short short short stories, but I'm glad I caught this one! I'm sure it could be expanded into a much longer piece, exploring the whys and consequences, but it is nice as it is.
Gorgeous, well-done, tightly written. Erotic *and* spot-on, emotionally insightful -- hot. Brevity its strength; good economy of word and phrase. This should be in a paper book / published online in an edited collection or magazine, if it isn't already. Thank you!
This was absolutely wonderful. Within such a short story you managed to show us the track of their history, glimpses into their personalities and the love that had grown in spite of an old, unknown wound. I loved the way you showed her being physically gentle while verbally and vocally expressing her anger. This was well written and excellent storytelling. Thanks.
i`m not fave of dome stories,but surprisingly i like this one and how love moves the character to trust each other.(cinder)
And then some! I'd agree with some of the other comments that a longer treatment could be interesting.