All Comments on 'All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You'

Enjoyed the suspense of both women & thier feelings. The story needs to continue so we can see how thier love develops,.

Janelle

I like this, but I don't feel it's quite there. If it's supposed to be a naturalistic story, we don't know enough about Lynne, about what it feels to be her, about what she's running away from. We don't know why, after she's got home, she does nothing to find Ricky (she does, after all, know where Ricky /said/ she was going). Before she meets Ricky, she's running away from 'her job and her family'; after she leaves Ricky, she goes back to a boyfriend she no longer really loves.

We particularly don't know why she's so wary, so fearful of Ricky, and why she reacts so badly to a sexual experience which is portrayed as warm and positive.

If it's not supposed to be a naturalistic story, it's got a dreamy feel about it but it isn't dreamy or symbolic enough.

Don't get me wrong; it's a lovely story, and your writing is good. But it's so nearly so much better.

I realy enjoy reading this story and I love your style of writing. But needs a follow up. What I'm wandering about is the fact that in all of your stories you start with a 'disclaimer' mentionning that it's all yours and da, da, da and that kind of cool me off a bit. I guess everyone knows that the story is your and I don't think that anyone wants to steal it from you, at least not me for one. Is there any specific reason why you keep mentionning that every time? Thanks in advanceMontreal, Quebec, Canada for your reply.

really good story i would love to know if it works out for them and what happens to the boyfriend

Sweet, and corny mostly adorable. Well conceived. 5🌟's

Thanks for sharing it with us!