All Comments on 'Appointment'

I like the start to this story and your writing style.

I enjoyed the blend of the story’s current and retrospective narration.

Looking forward to reading more.

My best regards

following the new trend of false advertisemnent: this is an extreme BDSM story, not Loving Wives. Enjoy humiliated husbands? -read it.

This is one of those stories that you hope doesn't end this way, and a sequal is in the future, because it held so much promise at first.

But if it does end here, oh well. But for me it held real promise because the story was about someone trying to stand up for themselves, but fell short of it with the current ending. Because if left this way then the husband is getting double screwed by both his wife and her current lover the shark of an lawyer.

Oh well

Call me perverse but I actually like the writing and the plotting. An excellent start. I say start because it is a little vague as to what the outcome is. Was he as shocked as you let on he must have been to find the lawyer was the man screwing his wife or was it intentional? I suspect he fainted when he saw who the lawyer was but we can't be certain. Where does he go from here?

You left some good opening here. And the writing was erotic where it needed to be.

Much better than most submissions!

regards,

C

It seems impossible to believe that the lawyer didn't know the husband's name. Which really makes him a jerk and a rather stupid and arrogant one at that.

Set up differently, I think this would be a great ending. The husband, ready to fight gets yet another body blow. Being hit with mighty blows does NOT humiliate a man. The only thing that can humiliate him is his response to those blows. You cannot be responsible for another adult (perhaps for a child.)

They can do the most hurtful or outrageous things and the only reflection on you is your judgment to get involved. How you react to those is the real indicator of who you are. I was corrected recently when I said a man wasn't a cuckold because he didn't accept his wife's cheating. That's my problem with English. If the wife cheats, he's a cuckold. However, I can't see any negativity being attached to a man because his wife isn't what he thought.

In this case, I would love to see the lawyer have his teeth knocked out. Is there anything as humiliated as a toothless shark?

Oh, and it should go without saying that I think this was well written and the character sympatric. I love the twist, now; I'd like to see another.

And then what happens?

Wait a minute - wait a minute - HE fainted???

Well no wonder he was such a good watcher (HE really fainted?)

How manly ! or Wimpus Erectus but definately not studly male ( He fainted? - cmon - that could ruin a story - you really had him faint???)!

I was thinking wouldn't it be wild if the lawyer was the guy fucking the wife. I must have read your mind. Hope you'll continue this and have the husband get his revenge finally. Thanks.

A great beginning but a really terrible finish. I hate this kind of incomplete story. Do you get some type sick enjoyment of frustrating your readers.

I think the husband should hired a private eye and with the pictures of them having sex you can take them to the cleaners.

Hope to read more chapters keep up the good work.

Pat.

Atlanta,Ga

Decayed Angel are you going to give us the ending to the story i would love to see how the lawyer goes after the two cheaters.

Pat Murray

Atlanta,Ga.

Getting real tired of this. It's not good writing when you start a story and expect the readers to do your work. I don't have that much imagination. Don't underestimate or overestimate the reader if they are going WTF???

If you are the author, you create the story completely with a beginning, middle, conflict, resolution and ending, not to do so is just plain lazy UNLESS you are inviting the other authors to finish it for you.

yes it is

well, sue the lawyer for alienation, and just leave with with not one more word. And get away from the faithful wife

THIS STORY NEEDS CLOSURE/EPILOG/SEQUEL. TK U MLJ LV NV

0

Terrible tale. I would have said it was excellent if there wasn't a safety on the gun.

HA

laving the slick boner, he tickled the hairy nutsack, betrayed!

I rated it a 1 simply because they did not have negative ratings. From the start of this very short and incomplete story it was easy to guess where you were going with it. The idea of the lawyer being the one that was screwing his wife was not necessarily the best plot choice. However, you could have made it work if you had taken the time to develop a substantial back story and at least a hint of possible pending satisfaction to be acquired by the protagonist.

As is this story is simple about a pathetic dolt incapable of serving out justice or acquiring revenge do to his social impedance. (man finds wife cheating, man unable to shoot lover, many finds lawyer is wife's lover, boo hoo). Awful

You leave a critical comment about the story and presume to offer advice? Fuck off and learn what you're talking about before you criticise someone's work. You use a presumptuous phrase like "acquiring revenge do to his social impedance" but you don't know the difference between "do" and "due"? Where do you assholes get off?Just read the free stories and shut the fuck up. Nobody wants to read your stupid assessments.

"... this story is simple about a pathetic dolt incapable of serving out justice or acquiring revenge do to his social impedance."

What a load of pretentious shit. Spare us this drivel!

I don't get it?

then he committed the wrong tort and the awful decescion, TK U MLJ LV NV

WTF? Just another wannabe writer who can't finish a story!

The lawyer he was having the appointment with is the same one that was fucking his wife. And he shot him.

I don't think this is a story. How the hell did they let this one get through?

Waste of time.

You gave the premise to a story and then stopped. Why?

Or did you get bitten by the same bug as so many authors in this site: a conviction that all one needs for a gripping, thought-provoking story is a sudden ending?b

What was the point of this story if there is no ending?

This was simply a waste of time. We know nothing about these people. And we don't know what happened to them. UGH!

Of the garbage poured out by this author. Not worth reading.

It's a nightmare in a nightmare. This is how many betrayed husbands feel when they discover the cheating. With luck, he can find a good lawyer and when this one represents the wife he can get disbarred. However, he really is done for it.

He got turned on, that’s sick. 2*s

retard

Not exactly a new situation. We-The-Readers have seen the P.I. be the Bull and collect Big Bucks for a faithful report on Hubby’s Sweetie … AKA the P.I.’s cumdump! And the marriage counselor who calms Hubby’s suspicions of hanky-panky … and provides Trust Training exercises on Guess Who’s nickel! At least in this case, Hubby recognizes the Legal Bull. If Hubby plays his cards right, he has a good chance at ending up single with a lot more money than he could earn by renting out Sweetie’s pussy/ass/throat for a year. Or the ‘moral victory’ of getting Legal Bull disbarred.

4*

This is the opening to a great story , has anyone expanded on this ?

Was there a point writing this?

Decent start, never an ending