All Comments on 'Boy of My Dreams'

This story was MUCH too short..there was little description.. practically no build-up.. and the sex scene was really short

I really loved, please write somemore about this story, i really liked the part where she tool control over him and taking him a little rough but then that's why i loved this story.

khuh

Proof that the screening process of this site is low. Either you are 18 and still in high school or you lied and are under 18 and still in high school. I was very much confused as to where this "college" is that there are bells for classes to start? Interestingly naive... otherwise the story was good but you really need to proof read stories not just for error in spelling and grammar but also in silly mistakes like where are these siblings going to school since it sounds like hes a freshman in high school and thats like usually 13 or 14 yeahs of age.

A girl's body should only be shared with the man she loves for life. Anything else is intolerable. Fix that, now. Please.

Wow, that was very different! I really liked it :)

Thanks for writing it for us!

First he was pinned down, then he's not. First she's swallowing all his cum, but the next sentence, he's cumming on her face? No reason why she feels this way about her little brother. Why him and not the older one, presumably who doesn't act like a goofball? Jumping up on tables in high school might be tolerate. In college? They call security. Someone else pointed out -- colleges don't use bells for classes; people are expected to get there on their own.

Worse, she betrays Johnson's confidence. Besides, Johnson is supposed to be bi, so the girl is not necessarily wrong for him. Hopefully he has more integrity. Thus far, she's a thoughtless rich girl obsessed with her brother -- even though he has indicated no interest in her, but rather wants a different girl. Not a pretty picture. Virginal boy with an obligatory big willie gets BJ and missionary -- and doesn't instruct him on how to please her? Or ride cowgirl so that she could show him? The writer needs to pay attention. Women and men are compatible, but penetration much less a hump and dump is rarely what gets a woman off. An experienced woman might do that to take the edge off, and then instruct. She just laid there. Not convincing.

You have the ability to write sentences down. People in stories need to act rationally. Having them be in one position or doing something and in the next sentence it's changed? Consider editing and re-posting. Though considering the age of the post, not bloody likely. 3*

I really enjoyed your story. It was a nice change from the usual sex crazed fantasies driven by lust. It was a touching love story that made the taboo aspect seem acceptable which is a remarkable achievement. Something tells me we have something in common. I could be wrong but I’m guessing we both are hopeless romantics.