All Comments on 'Brother And Sister Need Help'

You've been writing stories long enough to be past the point of "beginner's pointers", but if I might offer one: If you're writing sequels to a series of stories, it helps the readers keep track if you make them (or at least, the titles) chapters. Failing that, you could at least include instructions at the beginning of a new chapter something along the lines of "This is a continuation of 'Brother and Sister Help Each Other'. You may want to go back and read that one first."

I almost didn't realize that fact, and if the titles weren't so similar, I might not have figured out where to go to explain the abrupt way this installment began.

Looking forward to the "next" story in this series.

I tried to title this story as "Brother and Sister Help Each Other Ch. 2" but the submission page would not allow a title of that length. I then asked the staff to rename the earlier story "Brother and Sister Need Help Ch. 1" to avoid such confusion and I expected that they would do so but they did not. I apologize to my readers for the inconvenience.

the begininning was not handled well and the titles were screwy (use shorter titles from now on). the parents giving instructions on sex was creepy i hope you are smart enough not to get the parents involved sexually (but we have seen you are not to smart). the series needs a total rewrite it was rushed and chapter two was just to creepy.

Go back to grade school and LEARN PROPER GRAMMAR, the frequent and extreme over use of "word . . . word," isn't proper and wrecks the story basic structure. Where and when you ever got the idea this was good style and form don't know but its pure trash and rotten writting to use it.

Too bad about the title problems, but getting the parents intimately involved is far more intriguing. I enjoyed your effort. Please continue any way you like.

nasty little story, i liked it, i visit this site to fuckin get off not grade papers. you want to correct grammer and what ever other bullshit go get yourself a red pen and go hand out some home work. fuckin tool!

It definitely didn't go the direction I expected and that made it even more erotic.

Well written! Please continue/

God I loved it and was as hard as hell

Yea its true that there are some grammar issues but in most cases it is just slight mistakes no need to be so hard on him. The story to me is very intriguing and having mom and dad teach the kids about sex is something I hadn't seen that often and is welcomed as long as it stays that way unless of corse you are going for family sex scenario which personally isn't my cup of tea siblings and cousins is though.

My only concern is whole the siblings are already confessing their love for another yet in the background their is not mention of previous feelings and the build up doesn't seem to have allowed for such an attachment. Maybe is it just lust but if your trying to portray a romance maybe take the aforementioned two months for the siblings to actually form the attachment and move from lust to a true romance.

Awesome start and I'll be watching for upcoming chapters.

This didn't reach me the way chapter (?) 1 did.

Just was not to my taste, but then I dislike broccoli and brussel sprouts.

A bit too clinical, but wouldn't it be wonderful if all parents were so understanding and helpful? If we learned many of the skills of life the way we usually learn about sex, we wouldn't do very well until we were too old to enjoy it. Most of us could stand sex instruction even in our 40's.

In reality; parents should in fact help teach their children about sex. I am NOT talking about getting involved; somewhat as these two are doing (except parents should not touch the kids), talking about it, explaining masturbation / techniques, showing videos, explaining Birth Control, seduction versus rape / abuse. The fact that parents don't is part of what's going wrong. I did think that it was funny that the kids hadn't considered pregnancy.

I was born in the 1961 in a very small town and my parents never said squat. So I was in a blackhole; no knowledge, no experience, and since no one talked about it - led to believe that it was wrong. That Sex was completely Taboo until Marriage. There were more boys in school than girls; and I wasn't allowed to buy a car because my older brother got a girl preggo when I was 12. Yep; I got punished for what he did!

The most sickening part about it; a few years later my MOM would run around in her underwear as though it was nothing. Believe me; it was a sight I wouldn't wish on anyone out there, shudders, ewwwwwww

I am also thrown by the kids statements "we're in love", "we want to spend our lives together". Yes; they've known each other for 18 years, but that is not "Soul Mates". they might actually be right for each other, too early to tell.

One thing that puzzles me; why are the parents so calm about Incest? Is it part of their past?

Definitely looking forward to more chapters;

DKP

three major problems with this story

1) piss poor editing and writing.

2) bad titles and you were not smart enough to fix it before posting this chapter.

3) getting the parents involved in any way ruins a story and the way you did it made it unrealistic and stupid.

best thing you can do is delete everything and start over and use a good editor before reposting a story.

I have to agree the this story does need some serious editing to be made to flow a bit better. I actually like the parents surprising their children and their thoughtful instructions. The ending was very abrupt. The scene ought to be continued, with some description of the parent's reaction to what they are watching.

This took a different direction than I had anticipated. Wouldn't it have been nice to have parents so understanding. Dad could have at leased donated one of his rubbers to Alan for the instructional endeavor. Of course, when Alan goes down on Lizzie, his saliva will probably keep her from getting pregnant - worked for me!

I thought Dad was Dad...

"And found the entrance to her manhole with my finger tip"

Who calls a VAGINA, you know, a completely feminine entrance... a "manhole". What in the actual fuck?

I stopped reading after that plus the line in your previous story in this chain about the clit getting wetter when you rub it. Please learn basic female anatomy AND the various actual names of feminine anatomy. 'Manhole' is not one of them.

You got to remember that the kids are virgins and don't know the proper terms. Having their parents teach them, after being discovered. I feel it's a real turn on, having *hands-on* sex education and may lead up to a family orgy, after the pills kick in or the brother/sister cement their love by having a child(ren) in the future.

I've never heard a cunt called a manhole but I knew instantly what he was talking about. (I guess an ass would be manhole #2?) (A mouth would be manhole #3?)

For me, those "manholes" would be tongue holes, first.

Love the siblings getting caught.

What bad luck with the neighbor.

PLEASE DO STOP

Can’t wait for the next chapter

Needs to keep going, it is getting real good. 5 stars

Yeah, this was good. Could definitely use a sequel or two.

I didn't need mom and dad in the mix.