Charlie & Miley Ch. 05

"Looks like the two of you did rather well," Charlie remarked, looking at the four shopping bags stuffed with baby clothes, "You do realize our daughter is going to outgrow anything we buy rather rapidly, don't you?"

"We bought multiple sizes," Miley said, defending the amount of clothes she bought, "We should be good for at least a year and a half. Besides, we can save everything for baby number two - if we have another girl we'll be set!"

Charlie grinned, "Let's just get baby number one out of you first before we start worrying about that."

Miley sat on the bed to take off her strappy sandals, "Charlie, we need to decide on a name. We can't keep calling her 'baby number one' anymore. She'll get a complex."

"How can she get a complex? She's not even born yet."

Miley informed him, "I read in Cosmo that unborn babies begin learning speech patterns in the womb as they hear people talking. The article said that babies can even recognize and respond to their own names prior to birth."

Charlie chuckled sarcastically, "Well if Cosmo says it's true..."

"I won't have our daughter thinking her name is 'baby number one'," Miley put her metaphorical foot down, "So we need to decide on a name."

"Okay, okay," Charlie lifted his palms in surrender. He joined Miley on the edge of the bed, sitting beside her.

"What do you think of 'Emily'?" Miley renewed what had been an ongoing debate.

"Too cute," Charlie shook his head.

Miley bit her lip in thought, "Okay, how about 'Amanda'?"

"I like that name, but it's too common."

"'Collins'?"

"That sounds like a boy's name."

"Does 'Taylor' sound too much like a boy's name?"

Charlie shrugged, "I like Taylor, but I'm worried everyone will think we named her after that annoying pop singer; maybe for a middle name?"

"'Candy'?" Miley suggested.

Charlie leveled a frown at her.

Miley nodded at him with a sudden realization, "You're right, we don't want her to grow up to be a stripper."

"Is 'Elektra' completely off the table?" Charlie wondered.

Miley gave him a dry look, "Charlie, we're not naming our daughter Elektra."

"You said you liked that name when we were on our honeymoon!" Charlie accused.

"That was before Brian told me Elektra is a ninja assassin who kills people!"

"How about 'Mary Jane'?"

Miley rolled her eyes, "No. And not 'Lois Lane', either, before you ask."

Charlie sighed, "So 'Gwen Stacy' is out too?"

Miley opened her mouth to say no but she stopped herself and considered, "You brought that one up before, who's that again?"

"Spider-Man's dead girlfriend," Charlie replied.

"Wait," Miley remembered, "She's the one Emma Stone played, right?"

"Yeah."

"I like Gwen, but no."

"Why not?"

Miley somehow gave him a look that was both stern and loving at the same time, "Charlie, you name a dog or a cat after a comic book character, not a child. That would be tacky." She stood and pushed the thin straps of her dress off her shoulders, "Unzip me?"

Charlie rose behind her, "Do you want a traditional name?"

Miley thought about it as Charlie found the zipper in the seam of her dress, "Not necessarily." She slid the dress off and then hung it on the door of their closet. "But we can't go too trendy, either, like 'Zoe' or 'Skyler'. Those are cute but they'll be weird and antiquated by the time she's thirty."

"Her middle name doesn't have to be 'Stacy'," Charlie pointed out, "If you like 'Gwendolyn'."

"Gwendolyn," Miley said, trying it out, "Gwen."

Charlie approached, laying his palms on Miley's bulging stomach, "'Gwendolyn Taylor'?"

"Gwendolyn Taylor White," Miley tried, smiling at the way it sounded. "Oh, Charlie, I like that! Do you?"

"Yeah," he agreed, "I think that's a beautiful name." Charlie looked directly at Miley's protruding tummy, "Did you hear that, baby-girl? Your name is Gwendolyn."

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Curled in a comfortable easy chair in the rehab center's common area following supper, Stacy was trying to watch a reality dating show about twenty men vying for the affections of a single woman. There was a boy seated a few feet away at a folding table playing Solitaire who kept staring at her, however, distracting Stacy from the show. He looked to be about her age, had long black hair to the shoulders, thick-framed glasses, and a skinny body. Stacy recognized him from her group session earlier that day, though the boy hadn't shared anything with the group. Looking down at herself, clad in comfy jeans and a tee-shirt, Stacy wondered why he kept looking her way. It's not like she was wearing anything too revealing nor had any embarrassing stains on her clothes.

"Hey," Stacy finally said, suddenly remembering his name, "You're Cory, right?"

He flipped a card onto the table with a snapping sound and nodded quietly, suddenly shy that Stacy was talking to him.

"You look like you have something on your mind," Stacy said, lifting the television remote to turn down the volume.

He blinked oddly, "Are you still talking to me?"

Stacy grinned, "Um, yeah? There's no one else in the room. You keep looking over at me, like you have something to say?"

Cory looked down at his cards, "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to stare."

Stacy uncurled her curvaceous figure from the chair and approached the obviously shy boy, sitting down kitty-corner from him at his table. "What are you in for?" she joked dryly.

Cory looked at her, eyes wide, but then he grinned when he finally got her joke. "My parents sent me here," he said, his voice deeper than his slender frame would indicate. "I, um, heard what you said in group today. Is your boyfriend really Brian Schue?"

Stacy looked puzzled, "How do you know his last name?"

"You said you were dating the artist from Captain Darkness," he replied, "That's my favorite comic book."

"You're into comics?"

"Ever since I was a kid."

"And you know who Brian is?" Stacy asked, not fully understanding the impact of Charlie and Brian's geek-credentials.

"Sure," Cory nodded, "I mean, I've never met him or anything, but anyone into comics has heard of Charlie White and Brian Schue. They're like the Lee and Kirby of the modern era."

Stacy gave him a funny look, "Who?"

Cory gestured with his hands as he spoke, obviously passionate, "The first twelve issues of Captain Darkness will go down as one of the most influential runs in comic history, you know? It's up there with Miller's Dark Knight Returns or Moore's Watchmen. It's not as gritty as those stories, but Captain Darkness captures the pulp origins of comics and meshes that perfectly with a modern edge. It's brilliant!"

Stacy wasn't sure if Cory was still speaking English.

Cory chuckled, "You don't have any idea what I'm talking about do you?"

Stacy shook her head, "Not really, no."

"Let me put it this way," Cory pushed a hand through his long hair, "In the comic world, your boyfriend is like a rock star."

"I guess I knew he was successful, I just didn't realize he was famous."

"He's really your boyfriend?"

Stacy considered, "Well, I broke up with him a few months ago. I thought he was cheating on me, but..." She pushed some hair behind her ear, "I'd like to think we can make it work once I get out of here. I miss him, a lot. Him, Charlie, Mi-"

"Wait," Cory interrupted, "Charlie? You know Charlie White, too?"

Stacy replied obviously, "Of course, he's married to my best friend. We all went to school together."

"What are they like?"

"Charlie and Brian?" Stacy asked.

Cory nodded inquisitively.

Stacy smiled fondly when she thought of them, "They're best friends. And they're total geeks, you know? They don't even try to hide it. They're always talking about super heroes and Star Wars." She chuckled, "One time I listened to them argue for over an hour about who would win in a fight between Wolverine and Chewbacca."

Cory grinned, "That sounds like me and my best friend. So they're just regular guys?"

"Yeah," Stacy continued, "Charlie's the cautious and sensible one. Brian's more reckless and indecisive. They both have great senses of humor." She paused while thinking about them, "Sometimes I honestly can't decide which one of them I love more."

"Wow," Cory looked down at his Solitaire game, "They're lucky guys. I've never even had a girlfriend."

Stacy gave him a sympathetic look, "Just keep being you. You know, minus whatever it was that landed you in rehab."

Cory smiled, "You want to play some Hearts?"

"Yeah," Stacy decided, suddenly missing her friends all the more after talking about them. Cory had helped remind Stacy that she needed to accept people for who they were, and let people do the same with her. Neither she nor Brian were without their faults, but she loved him all the same. Stacy quietly hoped Brian would still be waiting for her when she finally got out of rehab.

=======

Charlie frowned at the television and used a remote control to change the channel for the tenth time in less than a minute.

Miley sat next to him on a massive leather sofa in her favorite pair of pink sweatpants and a white tank top that strained to contain her pregnant stomach. A bowl of iced cream topped with both chocolate and strawberry sauce occupied the bulk of her attention but she was growing irritated with Charlie's indecision, "What was wrong with that show? I like that one."

"It's stupid," Charlie declared, "How can they call putting twenty guys and one girl in the same house 'reality'?"

"But all the guys are hot," Miley justified her interest, licking some chocolate sauce off her spoon.

Charlie clicked through a couple commercials and finally paused on a program.

"Oh my god," Miley complained. "Charlie, I don't want to watch a cartoon!"

"It's not a cartoon," Charlie argued, gesturing towards the television, "Its computer animation."

"It's a cartoon," Miley reached to grab the remote out of Charlie's hand.

Charlie yanked his hand away out of reach, "I want to watch it!"

"We've already seen this one! Look, it's the one where Yoda rescues Luke from the droids."

"His name isn't Luke," Charlie pointed out. "It's Anakin. Luke is his unborn son."

Miley balanced her bowl of iced cream and continued to clutch towards the remote, "Well, me and your unborn daughter don't care! That's two votes to your one; now give me the remote..."

"No," Charlie continued to hold it away just out of Miley's reach.

"We always watch what you want to watch," Miley pouted, giving up.

"That's not true," Charlie changed the channel again, "Just the other night we watched that stupid movie about a girl dating a zombie."

"You like zombies!" Miley exclaimed, spooning up some more iced cream.

"Yeah, when they're trying to eat people, not when they try to fit in at high school; it's ridiculous! That could never possibly happen."

Miley rolled her eyes, "Like that's any less realistic than an elderly green midget fighting a bunch of robots with a light stick."

"Star Wars happened a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away," Charlie pointed out, "Who knows what was possible?"

"See what's on the movie channels," Miley finally suggested, struggling to lean over her pregnant tummy and set her empty bowl on the coffee table.

Charlie hit a remote button and pulled a menu up on the screen, "Let's see..."

Miley pointed, "Oh! The Notebook is on again, let's watch -"

"Forget it," Charlie refused, "There's an X-Men movie on HBO?"

Miley stuck her tongue out, "No superheroes."

"What about Superman?"

"No superheroes!" Miley stared at the menu, "Wait, what is 'Double Rendezvous'? Is that the one where Sandra Bullock and Tina Fey are undercover FBI agents?"

"I don't know," Charlie selected it. His eyes widened when the screen was suddenly filled with a pornographic scene involving a woman kneeling between two guys and alternating between servicing their erections orally. "Um, I don't think Sandra Bullock is in this one..."

"Ooh," Miley settled against Charlie's arm, "Let's watch this."

"You want to watch a porno?"

Miley shrugged, "Why not?"

Charlie worried, "What if your dad comes home?"

Miley giggled, "Charlie, we're not teenagers anymore. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't be too upset, especially since he's the one with the porno channel on his satellite package. What do you think of that girl? Do you think she's sexy?"

"She's okay," Charlie studied the blonde on screen, "Why? Do you like the guys?"

"The guy on the left is okay, I guess, and his cock is almost as big as yours."

Charlie glanced to his side where Miley was nuzzling herself against his arm, "Are you into this?"

Miley seemed unashamed, "Look at her, getting those two big cocks shoved into her face. She's slobbering all over them. I bet they cum all over her. It's hot."

"That turns you on?"

"Of course. She probably feels totally sexy having two guys so turned on by her that they shoot their hot messes on her face."

Charlie chuckled, "Miley, it's a porno. I'm sure she only let it happen because she got paid."

"So? That doesn't mean she can't feel proud about making those two big cocks stand at attention for her."

"I guess," Charlie looked back to the action on screen, trying to view the pornography using her perspective, "So it's not the guys that turn you on, but their erections?"

She nodded against him, "A cock is a powerful thing, Charlie. A hard, throbbing cock can turn a puritan girl into a ravenous slut. Women like to be flattered, you know? We like to know that men find us attractive and desirable. What's more flattering than a guy displaying his attraction by showing you his big boner?"

Charlie laughed.

Miley gazed up at him with a sheepish grin, "What's so funny? That's how you got me."

"I thought you loved me for my personality and uncanny sense of humor?"

Miley giggled, "I do, silly. But at first it was all about your gigantic cock. You made me feel so fucking sexy all the time the way it was always hard and begging for my attention, like I was the most beautiful girl you had ever seen."

"You were," he said softly, "I mean, you are."

Miley lifted a kiss to his lips, "That's why I love you. But before all that we humans aren't any different from the rest of the animal kingdom, you know? Like a peacock showing his big plume of feathers to impress some girl peacock so they can mate - that's no different than a girl getting all breathless over a guy's gigantic dick."

Charlie considered his wife's words, "What if I had a small penis?"

Miley peered at him questioningly.

"That day back in high school, when you pulled me into the men's bathroom and made me show you my dick; do you think we would have ended up together if I had a small penis?"

"Of course we would have," Miley assured him, "Charlie, we were fated to be together. You are the only man in the world that I... that I -"

Charlie glanced at her and saw an uncomfortable expression on Miley's face, "What's wrong, that ice cream not sitting well with you?"

Miley clutched at Charlie's wrist as her entire body stiffened, "Oh shit, Charlie."

Charlie suddenly grew very concerned, "What is it? The baby -?"

Miley bit her lip and nodded, "I think my water just broke..."