All Comments on 'Cindy, My Love Ch. 02'

I liked the narrative, but it was a little light on the dialogue (which, I believe, helps to make characters more engaging and "real" in a story). I also detected a few small typos, nothing serious, though.

All in all, I really liked it. In particular, I liked how the narrator was able to fully grasp the fact that what he's doing is techincally "wrong", but is willing to find an amicable solution because it feels so right. The conflict there is definitely palpable.

I look forward to finding out how this story continues. So, please and by all means, keep 'em comin'!

The two chapters so far have built up quite nicely. This needs to be continued through the last school year and onto UCLA, either with them together or suffering with the separation - my preference is together but I'm a romantic at heart!