All Comments on 'Collette, Too'

While the story was exciting and definitely erotic, I felt that it lacked substance. More to the point, I felt that it should have been longer and that there should have been more to it than what was given. That said, what I read was interesting, engaging and well-written. The dialogue, what little of it there was, worked well.

I enjoyed many of the descriptive passages in this- you touched well on all the major senses, which was a bonus.

This has the makings for a really good series of stories, but ONLY if you manage to keep the story going with more interesting stuff in between the sex. I would especially suggest that you delve more into the brother's mixed feelings about the affair with his sister- that he should express his concerns to her and show some internal conflict about the whole thing.

Meanwhile, I'd like to see Collette as more than a one-dimensional character. Right now, she seems less than dynamic and could use more color/flair. Show us some of the complication in her thoughts and life; make her "real" to us. For the time being, she simply comes off as being a fuck-bunny, which can be interesting on its own merits, but doesn't leave much room for character development.

Keep going!

'Far too brief a joy' should try writing stories, rather than essays as comments.

This is hot and simple. Can we have Collette 3?

Lukas

what a great story why didn't you continue the story dd the kids get caught by thier mom when she came home did collette get pregnant did they fuck some more that summer

NO ONE in their right mind ever says when they are having sex "I want to feel your hot seed splash against my womb."

Quit putting the sappy romance novel phrases and you will be fine.

Gotta say I am often surprised at how poetically inspired so many 'Lit' heroines are, especially at the point of incipient orgasm.

I feel slightly deprived that the best I can recall were far more plebian comments, no mention of 'hot seed splashing against my womb'.

Nothing personal LePretre. it just jumped into my sick mind.

The first story was a sweet love story, but this one ruins it all. Now she is a slut and part time lesbo. I wouldn't want her at all.

the first one was a little story of love which looked promising. now she has converted into a slut. fucking others.