All Comments on 'Derek's Story Ch. 01'

My story breaks weren't placed into the story so it all just runs together. Does anyone know how i can fix it or do i just have to resubmit it?

I say just continue on, don't worry about resubmitting.

Great start to the story, love to see what happens. It's kind of lifelike to me, so I'd love to read what could have been.

I liked it and hope you continue the story.

Just continue the story. Please.

A very believable storyline that is interesting to read and very erotic and sweet.

It is like a romance story with a bit of incest mixed in.

I am interested in how the lad is going to pursue the love of his life Kara and the new girl Jenelle who seems to be very interested in having a relationship with him .

Thanks for the good read.

Excellent story, i really enjoyed it. If you need someone to edit the little English typos here and there hit me up. 5 stars.

I liked the lead-in, the build-up to the story, and a good story to go on with, not just a pump-and-hump tale, so an excellent first effort, it can only get better!. Ignore the grammar experts, keep going, and I hope to see more from you soon.

Your Editied verision is much better.... I look forward to reading more chapters!

Aunt Aunt - love it! But why not uncle Tio? Oh, well; aside from that, a very nice conflict of interest theme, and that can be very interesting. Just came across this story, and looking forward to more of it. Some states do allow first cousins to marry, I believe, but maybe Maura will turn out to want Derek, or Janelle will get it on with her geeky brother. Ha!

if this is the edited version i would hate to see the original. you need to go back to school and learn to use a dictionary and a good editor. you have way to many wrong words here and it totally ruins the flow of the story and makes you look like an underage virgin. FIND A GOOD EDITOR AND DO A PROPER REWRITE PLEASE.

another unrealistic story where drom rooms DON'T HAVE LOCKS.

Unrealistic story, poorly written, and vague dialogue. I gave it 2 stars, and am hoping the other chapters are better than this.

Shane, thanks for being honest. I do hope you continue to read my other work. I am currently in the process of looking for an editor. You are more than welcome to apply for the position. The sooner they are edited the sooner I can submit better works to the site.

I think this was a good start to the story. I noticed the grammatical errors of course, but to me, they did not detract from the story. I think he probably forgot to lock his dorm room because of his drunken state.

Like the way the story has started will be interesting to read the Next Chapters.

A good story with good characters, but in desperate need of editing - lots of misspellings and typos.

But this is in serious need for editing in both grammar and spelling.