Dom and Sandro Ch. 03

Once or twice during sex, I would get a sneaky and dishonourable thought in my mind, that if I could do the same thing with a woman, we might be able to make a baby, though it would have to be through her potta rather than her culo, as Pietro Aretino would have put it! But as David once once told me, quoting Elsschot, tussen droom en daad staan wetten in de weg en praktische bezwaren (between dream and deed lie laws in the way and practical objections). There were of course no laws against me fucking a woman, but there were practical objections, such as doubt as to whether I could get it up. And of course, even if I could beget a child, there was no guarantee that the mother would let us keep it.

I continued fucking my darling Luke rather roughly for some minutes until it was my turn to come, and as I filled the condom I got my usual spiritual sensation of God pouring out His love. But this time, I was aware more strongly than ever of the sacramental significance: union of two human beings symbolizes the union of God with humanity. Just as God became Man inside Mary's body, so He comes to us in His love when two human beings unite their bodies. This seems to me to be summed up in the words of John Henry Newton, a favourite hymn-writer of Luke's father David:

Thus may we abide in union

with each other and the Lord,

and possess, in sweet communion,

joys which earth cannot afford.

Although to many, there is no joy greater than sexual union, the hymn reminds us firmly that we can expect even greater joys, albeit spiritual ones, when we accept God's love.

Luke reached up and put his arms round me as my dick began to slip out of his hole. He pulled me down on top of him and we just lay there for what seemed like ages, just feeling the warmth and tenderness of each other's bodies, before Luke sat up, kissed my lips, and said that he just had time for an espresso before leaving for work. I said that I would have a light meal ready when he got home.

Chapter XLV Tom: A village visit and a disappointment

In spite of having a good and enjoyable career in Trabizona, I often felt a longing to be back in Camford, and my visits always rekindled this. I just wished that Luke did not have to work so hard, and make such little career progress. Clearly though, he was in no position to leave Italy, and I could not see a future for me in Italy outside Trabizona. British academics with jobs in Italy have been the subject of pay discrimination for years, and I relied on Arturo to ensure that I did not become a victim, even if I had to take Italian nationality to do so. In the European Union, this should not be necessary, but the Italian political system is riddled with anomalies.

One day, in a fit of depression, I told Costanza of our desire for a child. She replied that her daughter, who lived in a mountain village a long way from Trabizona, knew of a girl in the village who had been abandoned by her lover when he found that she was pregnant, and he had disappeared before anything could be done to establish the child's paternity, rather like Sandro and Luke's biological father had done. The girl had no money. She was still breastfeeding her baby boy, and was desperate for help. Would she be prepared to come here, I asked Costanza. She could have our spare bedroom, though she would have to share a bathroom. We would pay for her and the baby's keep, and see what happened as the baby got older. Even if we could not legally adopt him, we could still behave as if we were his parents. "Of course," I said, "we will have to consult Luca. He might not want such a commitment, and I love him too much not to do as he wants." I couldn't help comparing the prospect with what Sandro and Dom had done. But they had had Tim Ingledown to help them.

When I put the suggestion to Luke, he was cautiously positive. "She might be a totally clueless girl, and we would end up doing everything, while she just sat around at our expense! So we do have to proceed carefully, but I guess that there's no reason not to go and see them. One precaution though that we ought to take on a first visit is to ask my mother to come with us, as well of course as Costanza. My mother will soon spot any problems about the mother. After all, she would be living with us, and in flat it would be at pretty close quarters. Also the girl will need some female guarantees that we are really gay and that this is not some plot to get her into our bed."

Costanza arranged for us to go with my mother to the Apennine village where her daughter lived. It was quite a drive, and the mountain countryside was beautiful. We first went to Costanza's daughter's house, where we had coffee. That's when we heard the bad news. The baby's mother had taken up with another man. I was devastated to hear this. My mother and Costanza's daughter offered to go and see her alone. They did so, and after an hour or so came back with the news that the baby's mother and the new man were planning to marry and bring up the baby. I was seething with anger at the disappointment. Luke and his mother did their best to point out to me that the girl had actually solved her own problem. After all, what future was there for her if she and the baby had come to live with us? Our flat was too small for a growing child, she herself would be sidelined as a mother, and would have to go without sexual relations. Viewed from every point of view what she had done was the best course of action. I had to agree, but I was full of bitter disappointment for some weeks.

Chapter XLVI Luke: Tom gets a foot on the academic ladder

After our disappointment over the possible baby, Tom became more moody and morose than I had known him since his second year as an undergraduate. Even an evening with Arturo and Bastian failed to enliven him. I did my best to console him in bed, but even sex did not cheer him up. I loved him so much, and I was hurt that when his career was going so well, and his prospects were so much brighter than mine, he was allowing the lack of fatherhood to upset him. Most men would just shrug it off and concentrate on their career. I mentioned this to Pauline van Houtenstok, and told her in confidence the circumstances occasioning Tom's melancholy. I expected her to be cynically amused, but in fact she was very sympathetic. "I think that he needs to consult an expert," she said, "not a shrink: someone who knows about adoption and its international aspects. I don't know one, but such people must exist."

"I know someone who can find out for me," I said. The next afternoon I rang Tim Ingledown, and asked him to find such a person. He said that it might take some time, but he would put his assistant on the job, until one or more names was forthcoming.

This news cheered Tom up. He threw himself into his lab work, and after a couple of months of great success (or good luck, as he preferred to call it), Arturo summoned him to his office along with Ben, and offered each of them an academic appointment for five years. Tom and Ben would have to be interviewed by a university committee, but Arturo assured them that it was a pure formality to check on their language skills. Both of course accepted on the spot, and a delighted Arturo invited the two of them plus Leonora and me to a celebratory dinner at his house with him and Bastian. We persuaded Costanza to babysit for Ben and Leonora. She had known them both for several years. Francesco the baby had met her a few times, and he tended to sleep soundly. Anyway, to be sure, Costanza had Ben's mobile number. The dinner was a great success. It was not a bit like our 'four gays together' evenings, which were glorified booze-ups with an injection of culture. Even so, I was invited to sing. I sang Der Vogelvänger bin ich ja fromDie Zauberflöte, Thus saith the Lord from Händel's Messiah and of course, my signature aria Per questa bella mano.

The conversation got onto the topic of gayness. Ben and Leonora were fascinated to hear the different attitudes of the two male pairs. Tom and I both felt that we possessed each other, that our union was a deep and lifelong gift from God. Arturo and Bastian in contrast said that theirs was a much looser relationship of two gay men who got on well together and enjoyed each other's company. But we both said that sexual intercourse was an essential part of our relationship: we were not merely friends. We all went home by cab at Arturo's expense.

Chapter XLVII David: Death and inheritance

That July, a major event took place. After a short illness, Mrs Singleton, Jon's mother, died at the age of eighty-eight. Luke and Tom as her favourite grandchildren both got time off work to attend the funeral at the English church in Nice, where Jon gave a brief spoken tribute to his mother. Jon was obliged to spend a couple of weeks in Nice sorting out her affairs as co-executor. She did not leave much capital. To avoid tax, she had given most of it away to her grandchildren. However, there was seven years to run on the lease of her apartment, and Jon had to decide whether to sell the lease or merely let the premises. He decided on letting, and after French tax, there was a significant income from the rent. Mrs Singleton had left €100K to Tommy, but there were no other family bequests, merely gifts to friends and neighbours. Her annual income from a family trust now reverted to Jon, and as it originated in England, he did not have to pay crippling French income tax on it.

When Jon got back, we took Tommy to see Tim Ingledown, who told him that he was now comfortably off, but that he should not become a big spender when he got to University. He had become very friendly with Beatrice, Caterina's granddaughter, who was at the end of her first year at Islip. They had spent the summer together going off on trips in a hired punt, or visiting places of interest round Camford. Tommy was learning to drive, but until he passed the test, he and Beatrice rode everywhere on their bikes. He took her swimming at the Camford Olympic Pool, they went to films at the Rialto, they even visited the odd nightclub. Tommy was by now just eighteen, and had received an offer of a place in the honour school of Classics and Modern Languages subject to him getting an A* and two As at A level, and the same conditional offer from Boni's, as Saint Boniface's College was called.

In the August, he had obtained his results and he had got two A*s in Greek and Latin, an A in Mathematics and an A in Italian. This meant that he would have a two-year course studying Greek and Latin and a further two years studying Italian. In mid-October, he moved into College, as of course did Beatrice, and from then on, they saw very little of each other. Jonathan and I paid his board and lodging and gave him an allowance of £1K per month.

At this point our story ends. It has really been the tale of Sandro and Dom, from the time that they came to Camford to the time that, having become partners and fathers, they were now busy establishing their careers. Tom and Luke, though happy residents of Trabizona with a large circle of friends, have still not got the children that they long for. Jon and myself, now resident full-time in Camford and happy in our careers, are about to face an upcoming challenge to one of the institutions to which Jon has dedicated much of his life. It is hoped that a sequel to this story may round off the details of these men's lives and follow further Tommy's life in Camford and afterwards.

THE END