by scouries
Good flow and lead in - little rough on the transition and travel to Florida part but they got there, that's all that matters!!!
More believable than you can imagine. It was a great story, thank you.
While incest is distasteful to most people, I found this story to be truly romantic and wonderfully sensuous. One of the best stories I have ever read on Literotica! My only quibble is that the ending was rather rushed. Deserves continuation! What will be his future relationship with her mother? How about it? Jim, I salute you. Pete.
I was put off initally by the title but this story turned out to be very good. Your writing is excellent...the way you're able to deliver real characters and emotions in the short amount of space is remarkable. The dialogue was realistic and flowed very well throughout the story. Thank you!!!
This has almost got to be the best, hottest story I have ever read on Lierotica. The only thing that would have made it more outstanding would have been some anal sex after the father spanked the daughter.
Please write a sequel.
I am not the target audience for this story, as incest does nothing for me. I enter this review only as a fair critique of your writing, subject matter aside:
Your setting is not bad. Being originally from upstate New York myself, nothing seemed out of question as far as that. You pay attention to the surroundings, and it shows.
Your writing is fairly solid, although weakened in parts by cheesiness like "nooooo" and "yesssss" and whatnot. As a well-formed piece, the story fails because of executional errors like that, and various other nits. It could have used an editor going through with a fine-toothed comb.
Maddy's transition via Stockholm syndrome is unconvincing. She adjusts too well. While you do not show the situation from her POV, she would be reacting far differently than she reacts. She did not feel like a real character to me, but a device to drive the story along, built on cliched expectations of teenage characters.
Perry's behavior as an ex-con is also unbelievable. He reacts precisely as the plot dictates him to react, not as a believable character: When he wants sex, he takes it, and when he's supposedly faced with a moral crisis, he's crushed by it temporarily. Human beings do not react like that; people who are conquerors (as I imagine Perry is, as he has been portrayed in your story) remain conquerors, and do not transform temporarily into milquetoasts and then back again into conquerors.
The writing style itself feels serviceable and pedestrian. While there are no glaring errors besides missing commas and the like, there is also no sense of an authorial voice. I would encourage you to develop a distinct voice, as it didn't come through here.
I hope this helps.
this is one of the excellent stories i've read here. a very touching tale. keep up the good work!
Great job! Good build up with a super twist. You had me fooled. I thought you were going to get the mother involved and you would live happily ever after.
Nice writing, good dialogue.
PW
This was a awsome story! The only thing that would have made it better would be if you would of added more detail. Write a sequal or more rape stories
This was a awsome story! The only thing that would have made it better would be if you would of added more detail. Write a sequal or more rape stories
Once again you have captured me and lured me in...only to throw me for a loop. Loved the story, KEEP IT UP!
I loved this story. I love the fact that it really lures the readers in and captivates them. I would die to see a continuation of this story.
I feel as all did in there answers to your story. I thought it was also great, but I do wish you would continue it to where he meets up with her mother and they live happily ever after. It is good as it is but something is left hanging.
i like the way you write this incest love between a father and daugther.i hope i can read more stories like thisin the near future. keep up the the good work thanks a lot
i really liked it its so nice that they got together after knowing about each other to me its natural i have been into this well behind doors nothing like this intel but alot in some ways but i thank you andwell everyone here in the site
You're story telling is magnificient. I could not stop reading after selecting it. I'm not so sure that you should attempt to add any more to your already perfect story. Sometimes, when we attempt to make things better by adding more, the whole thing becomes sour. However, that being said, I would never pass up another story that had your name attached as the author. Thank you for the time you spent and your creativeness. I expect that you will continue your success in the future.
Himself
"Tea, I've got tea," she answered back. "I'll make it," she said as she lowered her pack from her back to the porch and then started to rummage in it. "Tea? A real sissies drink." "That's what your brother used to say," she laughed back.
I laughed reading it, really tickled myself.
Wow!! This one was hot hot hot. I totally loved it!! Great story. Very sexy. Thanks for sharing.
I must say I enjoyed the twists and turns as you guided the story along. It made one forget about where they found it .. and able to be surprised at the end with him finding out. Very well written.
or a good comment when everyone else loves it, were missing. And, all of us really enjoyed the story. Stories that seem to need additional endings usually get them... in our minds, endless twists and turns and more. That's probably better than words. Thanks for stirring our imaginations and building our desire. We have to leave now for another of your stories to relieve that desire.
super hot, i was wet by the time i was done. all naughty little girls need a big, bad ex-con daddy. :)
This story was so hot. I was touching myself the whole time I was reading it. My pussy was completely soaked. Can't wait to read more of your stories.
Loved the story but you stole my birthday (June 15th 1987), I don't like you anymore... :)
YOU THE FRICKING MAN I DONT DRINK BUT IF WE EVER CROSS PATHS I HAVE TO BUY YOU A DRINK AND HEAR IT FROM YOU DAMN
She told my birthday too sept 15...lol I think this story need another part. Dont let it end...:)
Dude, this story is so good! I'm glad it turned out the way it did between them.
I loved it. Mad eme so wet hot for my Daddy, wishing he was an ex-con too. We need a complete story line and I think mom needs to join the fun!! but not till they have completely explored the Daddy Daughter experience.
I have to admit I liked this alot,.....my fiance who is older than I and a parolee to boot makes it hit home.....maybe this spring we'll have to go "hiking" after reading this :D
I actually really liked this a lot. I actually felt a sympathy with the characters. Very well-written. This is one I could see expanded into a long story. I'm sure there have been situations like this out there.
Over the year I keep coming back to this story, it is absolutely my favorite!
After having read so many of your stories, this one was completely different and the climax just had to be like THIS... Looking forward to the sequel now with MOM involved and then a 3-some ... HAPPILY EVER AFTER END !
I love this story. I've lost count of how many times I've read it. I hope you write more soon, I'm a huge fan of your work.
I loved this story. The telling made every inch of my being tingle. Quite the literary tale. Keep writing. <3
Very twested story but thays what i like and thats reason i keep reading..love exscaping in to ur storys plz keep up grate work.every chance get set down my phobe read everyone aske what you always reading.i dont tell all because love mystery. Like ur storys
I still can't get over this story. I squirt all over my dildo every time I read it. It needs a sequel for sure. I wish I had an ex-con daddy to fill me up with his giant cock and fuck me until I'm raw. My pussy's soaked just thinking about it. Please write more.
I really enjoyed reading this story, but also enjoy most of your writtings. There is just a really nice and realistic flow to your stories, intimate, shy, forceful, loving, lustful, and completely believable. Good Luck. This is a special story...Thanks for taking the time to put it in writing.
Sometimes I have trouble with stories like these, but it wasnt too bad, you love to hate it and hate to love it... You want to kill the bastard, but at the same time... I think because it falls in that rape fantasy niche... You know it would never actually go like this, but for a fantasy... You just hope you can get your girlfriend/boyfriend to play along with you. Heh.
...I'd like to, but I could never ask my girl. One of her exes forced himself on her when he was drunk. Messed her head up pretty bad. The first time we started doing some heavy petting on the floor of my place, clothes on... I was over her, grinding.. Dry humping while we were kissing, she freaked out and started crying hard. I had no Idea what the hell was going on.. At the time I just thought.. 'What the hell have I got myself into with this one?' ...I seemed to draw in the damaged girls like a magnet or something... That or every damned girl Ive met has been fucked over by some loser guy...
I think thats the attraction of younger girls/women... Their innocence and naivety, they havent been screwed up by some fucktard yet. They're honest and open and want to learn and play. I think thats more attractive than just a hot body. ...meh, Im wandering!
Loved the story ;)
After 20 years, of prison life, he finds a lovely blond and gets her virginity. Interesting family life and it needs to be brightly shinning with five stars, day or night.
No beating around the bush with this one. Male standpoint of course. Easy to get hard and get off. Thank you.
I've read most of your stuff and consider you a good (albeit not outstanding) writer. But then I read this and it seems to be on a different league to all your other work. It's a really slimple but hot story.
i gotta say..... i wish it would happen in real life! thanks
I can't believe I haven't commented on this story yet!
I have read it so many times! Love this story 5⭐ favorite and added to my top 50 daddy/daughter list here
But this next one make it where either he or his daughter Maddie or both of them seduces her mother
your one of the best authors out there. You have insightfulness very realistic about your stories. You do seem to know the female mind. Im just a old guy that enjoys your work. Very believable stories. thanks for taking the time to share them with your readers. Best of luck.
Please write another one! I'd love to read about how he gets a second chance at fatherhood when they find out that his daughter is carrying his child!
WOW! That was a WILD ride!!!! Super creative, super descriptive, super fun!!!! I SO did not expect that twist!!!! Nice work! Thank you.