Fearless

Then she sat up, and looking directly into my eyes, said, "That's good because, in the short time we've known each other, I've begun to realize that I'm beginning to care for you more than just a little."

Instinct took over and I laid my fishing pole against the side of the boat and then leaned down and gently took Sara in my arms and said, "I've been all over the world and seen all kinds of pretty as well as ugly things, and until now; I've never seen anything so beautiful in my life than what I'm looking at right at this moment," and then I tenderly kissed her lips. As I stood back up I saw a single tear run down her cheek. "Are you alright?" I asked. She stood and faced me smiling and put her arms around me. She leaned in closely, our lips were now mere centimeters apart but as she went to kiss me, my fishing pole shot violently across the deck. Had I not grabbed it when I did, it would've been pulled into the ocean by whatever was on the other end of the line. I latched on tightly to it and pulled back as hard as I could. This time however; the fight lasted considerably longer and by the time I got the fish to the boat; we were delightfully surprised at what I'd caught. It was a grouper, and after weighing it, found that we now had enough fresh fish to last the three days I was planning on spending on the ocean.

I managed to get the fish scaled, gutted and filleted. I cut the fillets so that they were sizable enough that one of each would make a good meal. Then I put them below deck into refrigerated storage. After everything was cleaned up; I started Theia's generators and made preparations to cook lunch. I'd bought the necessary herbs, spices and condiments etc.., and stocked them aboard in the days before we left. As I was getting the Jen-Aire™ grill fired up; Sara came into the galley, and pushing the side of her right hip against my left, she shoved me away from the grill, then laughing, said, "I remember what happened the last time you tried grilling grouper for me," and then she fell into a hysterical fit of snickering and giggling.

"I was going to cook the snapper first, girlie," I replied laughing.

After she regained her composure she stepped into me, and wrapping her arms around my waist, she kissed me gently. Her lips were like liquid fire against my own, and a flame that had been smoldering within me all day long that, had I not stopped after a few moments, would've erupted. "If we keep this up we're never going to get anything done," I said, now breathing heavily. Sara's eyes were glazed over and she nodded wordlessly while still pressing herself fully against me.

Finally we parted with neither of us wanting to, but both of us knowing we had to. Sara put her hand on my arm and said, "I really do want to cook for you Tom. If you'll show me where everything is; I promise you feast fit for a King!"

I grinned as goofy as I possibly could and replied, "A King huh? Well, let be the first one to show you the way around the galley, M'lady."

"Please," replied Sara smirking, "On second thought; I can find my way around the galley just fine. Why don't you go above deck and play while I make lunch, little boy?" I decided to play along and act just like a kid would. So, without a word I turned, and not very hard, but firmly enough to get her attention without hurting her, pinched her on her beautiful little butt then dashed out of her reach above deck. "OOO! HEY!" she yelled, followed by her beautiful girlish giggle.

I climbed onto the deck above her and poked my head into the hatch upside down, and smiling, said "Did you call me?" She turned around smiling and after saying nothing; she kissed me then pushed my head back through the hatch and closed it.

I decided to put on a mask and some fins so I could look at Theia's underside and check out the hull, screws and rudder. After I was ready, I jumped into the cool clear, water and dove beneath Theia's hull. She was in pristine condition and reaching out; I touched her hull with my bare hand so I could gently caress the tummy of the only mistress I would ever know. From the training I'd received in the military; I was able to hold my breath for a considerable amount of time. I'd only been down for about thirty seconds so, I decided to explore the screws and have a closer look at the rudder. I was beginning to experience the familiar rush I felt every time I was in the water, and I began to realize how much I had missed the caress of, what truly was, my mother.

I approached the screws and was amazed. They looked as if they were brand new and the rudder was as smooth as glass and was built to cut through the water with exact precision. It was nearing time for me to ascend to the surface so, with a quick thrusting kick of legs; my head broke the water a few seconds later. I took off my mask and swam toward the small entry ladder that was permanently anchored against the stern. I took off my fins and mask and threw them over the side and onto the deck, then began to climb aboard. Halfway up the ladder I heard what sounded like someone crying. With that, two steps put me aboard ship, and, due to some old habits that had not yet died, on definite alert.

What I found both shocked me and broke my heart at the same time. Sara was curled up in the aft Starboard corner of the boat hugging her towel and crying her eyes out. I flew to her side, and wrapping my arms around her, said, "Sarah, honey what's wrong? Are you okay?" She looked up at me and stared at my face. Then suddenly she threw her arms tightly around my neck and began to openly sob. The only thing I knew to do was to simply hold her and let her cry. Whatever it was that seemed to be hurting her was not something light from the way she was crying.

~~~~~~

Chapter Six

"Are you alright?" I asked Sara after she began to calm down, returning to normal.

She sniffed and nodded her then looked at me tears still in her eyes and said, "After my Daddy was killed when I was little, my Mom started drinking a lot and she would leave me alone in the house for days at a time. She never said anything. She would just leave and I would always be left alone and..." then her voice began to falter as she continued, "...when I came out to ask you how wanted your potato and you were gone, I...." and she began to cry again.

"Now now, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. Shhh, its okay baby," I said, soothingly. She eventually stopped crying and I was able to get her to stand up. "Would you like to lie down and rest for a while? I can finish lunch ya know?" I asked her . This woman is a real trooper because she sat straight up as if nothing happened, then flashed a brave smile then devilishly said, "And let you burn us down? I don't think so," and then giggled and trotted happily back to the galley with me watching her cute little butt wiggling all the way. Once she disappeared below deck, I knew right then that one of my missions in life would be to never let her have any reason to hurt or feel bad about anything, ever again.

Lunch was very good and I was extremely impressed by Sara's culinary skills. We ate in silence and simply enjoyed the sound of the ocean and the company of one another. Once Sara and I pitched in together and cleaned the galley, I went to the helm and started Theia's engines, turned off her generators and raised anchor. Sara appeared right beside me shortly thereafter, and with a gentle push, we moved forward and to the east, staying well beyond the prohibitive boundaries of the sanctuary. The law said nothing however about anchoring just outside the sanctuary though so; that's exactly what we did. I found us a good spot in eighty feet of water and dropped the anchor. As I was turning off Theia's engines; I turned to Sara and said, "Feel like doing a little diving?"

"God yes," she replied, and then wrinkling her brow, added "But I didn't bring any gear."

As I raised the dive flag, I just grinned and replied "Trust me Darlin."

In no time; I had Sara rigged and ready to hit the water. Just before we stepped off the stern; she simply lead over and kissed me, then adjusted her mask and regulator and stepped out and dropped into the water. I went in right behind her, and once we were both submerged; we looked at each other gave the "Okay!" signal, and then together descended into the depths of the sea. We softly touched down on the ocean floor with no problems whatsoever. Once we adjusted our buoyancy; we glided effortlessly just above the reef.

It was as if we were witnessing a Mardi Gras taking place underwater. There were so many different sizes, shapes and colors of fish, all moving in different directions and choreographed by Mother Nature to music only they were privy to. Suddenly I felt Sara's hand in mine and her body closer to me. I looked over at her to see her eyes through her mask and although we were 80 feet beneath the surface of the ocean; I was still captivated by their radiant brilliance. I swam, observed and enjoyed not only the beauty before me, but the beauty alongside me....and thus began the healing within my soul.

~~~~~~

That evening as we sat on Theia's stern having cocktails; Sara smiled and said, "I wanted to thank you Tom."

"For what?"

She smiled, and after sitting in my lap and putting her arms around me, she kissed me briefly said, "I'm talking about earlier this afternoon when I kinda freaked out."

"Aw hell, it was nothing," I absently replied.

Suddenly she became angry, and standing up with her hands on her hips, glared at me and replied, "Maybe not to you it wasn't, but to me, it meant a lot..." then her facial expression changed to that of sadness, "....and another thing, why do I always have to be the one the one that makes the first move when we kiss?" Tears began to trickle down her face, and with a hint of sadness in her voice, she said, "What's the matter, Tom? Don't you think I'm pretty?" Before she could say another word, I jumped up from my seat, and taking her swiftly into my arms, kissed her as passionately as I could. I made sure that she could feel it all the way down to her pretty painted little toe nails. Of course it had just as much of the same effect on me as it did on her.

Once our lips had separated from the kiss and we were both breathing very heavily, I looked at her sternly, and then as softly as I could, replied, "Is it alright that I want to take things slowly with you?" She looked at me as if she'd seen a ghost and then sat back down in her seat and began to cry uncontrollably. I was beginning to get a frustrated with all the drama I was being subjected to, but just the same, I leaned down and put my arms around her and said, "Please don't cry, I wasn't trying to upset you. I'm just not the kind of guy that can be physically intimate with a woman unless I know her well enough."

Suddenly her eyes sparkled, and after wiping her tears with the back of her hand, she smiled and said, "You're right! This isn't your fault, Tom."

"What're you talking about when you say 'not my fault'?" I asked, now thoroughly confused.

She smiled, and taking me by the hand and making me sit down beside her, she put her soft palm against the side of my face and replied, "You really are such a dear, dear sweet man Tom. I guess that I owe you an explanation, huh?"

She was beginning to open up to me now and I was not about to stop her so I said, "Only if you feel like talking."

Then she sadly hung her head and continued, "When my Mom left me, it was a miracle that John and Molly were there to take me in. Molly used to sit up nights with me when the nightmares came. But she and John took care of me and loved me just like I was their own and I love them both very much. I guess what I'm trying to say is, that I'm still kinda messed up in the head a little bit, and I care about you so much, but something inside of me from my past keeps telling me that you'll leave too."

Then she stood up and shot below deck and ran forward. I heard a door slam, and because I was now so in tune with her; I could hear as well as feel her weeping bitterly in her cabin. I took a moment to examine my own feelings, and before I even had time to think about it; I knew in my heart that I wasn't going to be able to breathe without Sara in my life. I loved her and it was as plain as a slap in the face that I had to go after her. So I ran forward and after knocking on her door and calling her name, I opened her cabin door and slowly peeked in.

For the first time since I'd known her, I could clearly see fear written all over her face, taking my heart to the breaking point. I layed down next to her on her bed and put my arms around her and literally cried with her. All of the emotions that I'd kept bottled up over the years came boiling to the surface. I cried for her and with her, while at the same time all the pain that was within me began to violently expel itself from me. I cried for Sara and with our arms wrapped tightly round one another; I cried for me and for all the friends that I lost. We said nothing and let our emotions loose to flow freely like the sea that surrounded us while being cradled in Theia's arms.

We began to calm as we clung to one another tightly while our breathing was beginning to return to normal. Sara raised her face to mine and said, "I love you Tom!"

"I love you too Sara. I have since the first time I saw you, but I was too afraid," I said, knowing it was true beyond any shadow of a doubt.

"Afraid, afraid of what?" asked Sara.

I placed my palm against that beautiful face of hers and replied, "I was afraid of admitting it to myself and afraid of losing you."

She smiled and with her hand pressed tightly against mine on her face, she cooed, "I guess we're stuck with each other now, because I'm not ever letting go of you, Tommy McNeal!"

I leaned back to look at her, and with one last tear falling slowly down my cheek, I exhaled and said, "I'll die without you Sara."

She kissed me and then, with that giggle that I will forever adore, she said, "No you won't because I'm not going to let you."

So what do we do now?" I asked.

Sara sat up with a concerned looked on her face and said, "Tommy before we go any further; there's something else you need to know about me!"

Because of the fact that she'd already shared her past as well as her fears with me; I had a feeling that I knew what she was going to tell me. But because I wanted her to be able to feel in control; I smiled and softly said, "Whatever it is, we'll work through it together, my love."

She still looked a little pensive, but she still put on a brave front and said, "I'm still a virgin, Tom, and I'm a little afraid."

I knew right then that, in his infinite wisdom, God had placed a very precious and special angel in my life and I had to treat her carefully, as she was still fragile. So, I smiled and took Sara by the hand and said, "You know that when people love each other they express those feelings in a physical way, don't you?"

Sara began to laugh wildly and said, "Good Lord, Tom, I'm not a kid ya know. Yes! I know what people do." Then she calmed down and looked at me seriously and said, "I love you with all my heart, I swear it! I'm still just a little scared is all so, please be gentle with me, okay?" I began to laugh just then making Sara look at me sternly, and with a cross tone of voice, she said "What is so damn funny?"

I grabbed her, making her squeal and then pulled her to me with my arms around her and replied, "I love you Sara Hartley so, you take all the time you need. I'll love you until the day I die and then for an eternity afterwards, and I don't plan on going or being anywhere that you're not."

Sara's face lit up like Easter Sunday morning and she kissed me firmly on the lips and said, "I knew you were the one the minute I laid eyes on you ya know." "Well you knew more than I did, that's for sure!" I replied laughing. All at once Sara gave me that now all too familiar devilish look of hers and said, "Have you tried out the hot tub yet?" and then she giggled and took off down the passageway that led above deck.

I had turned on the heater in the hot tub before we began making our way to the Dry Tortugas so, by this time, I knew that the water would be at just about the perfect temperature. The sun was barely touching the horizon as Sara and I made our way to the forward deck or Foc'sle, as it's called in the Navy. I lifted the cover off the top of the hot tub and the steam billowed into the air. I checked to make sure that the temperature was an even one hundred degrees before I looked at Sara, and smiling, said, "Well if you're waiting on me then you're backing up." Sara gave me a seductive look then, right before my eyes and tantalizingly slowly, she began to peel off her bathing suit one clasp at a time.

Once she was totally nude, she lingered mere moments before she was in the water. Then she looked at me and said, "It's your turn, baby!"

Without ceremony or spectacle; I took off my shirt followed quickly by my shorts (I never wear underwear) and gave her just enough time to quickly glance at my body before I was in the water sitting directly across from her. I'd not turned on the bubble jets yet and the water was crystal clear revealing one to the other in all our glory. Sara was built perfectly just as I knew she would be. I felt some familiar stirrings in my groin so, as not to embarrass either one of us; I reached over and turned on the jets making the water come to a seeming boil.

Sara noticed my blush and said, "What's the matter, Tommy? I never took you for the shy type." I just laughed and shook my head and before I knew what was happening; Sara was upon me pressing her now naked body against mine.

"Sara, honey, you're about to start something that, once it gets going; I'm not real sure that I'll be able to stop!" She smiled seductively again and said, "What if I told that you're the man I've been waiting for and that I don't want to stop." Trying to evoke some semblance of reason; I replied "You've come this far with your virginity in tact. Don't you want to save it for the man that you're going to marry?" She giggled and, placing her palm against my cheek again, she said "As far as I'm concerned; I've found the man that I'm going to marry and he's right here in front of me with a look in his eyes that tells me he's scared shitless," and then she layed down on me and began to laugh hysterically.

The thing about it is; I really was scared shitless, but I knew that she was right about the man she was going to marry. I never could say no to her and I still can't. But at the time the only thing I did say was, "You seem pretty sure of yourself don't you?"

"Yes and I'll show you how sure I am," and with that she sat up, then reached down between us and grabbed my very erect and very hard manhood. Before I knew what had happened; she sat down hard on me making me pierce her virginal membrane in one thrust. She groaned very loudly, and after sitting very still for a moment, said, "Now do you believe me?"

"I love you Sara," was all I could reply. In a few moments she began to move very slowly up and down softly sheathing me within her velvet essence. I felt as if my whole world had come crashing down in an instant and then suddenly rebuilt, with Sara at the very center of it. All I could see or feel was her and all she felt or saw was me. Looking back, it was a time of rebirth for me and with every gentle thrust into this beautiful creature that was now just as much a part of me as any other part of my body; I saw that my life was now my own again and that my darling Sara would be there from now on to chase away the painful dreams and nightmares that might haunt me. Sara reached her climax only moments before I did, and for a few shorts minutes; it was as if God himself had come to earth to rapture both our souls deeper than either had ever experienced. Afterwards; Sara just continued to lie on top of me while she caught her breath. "That was the most beautiful thing I've ever known, Tommy," she said, still breathing a little heavily. "I love you," I replied. Sara looked up at me, and with tears streaming down her face; she smiled and said, "You don't know how much I'll always cherish this moment. It was just the way I dreamed it would be," then she kissed me tenderly and added, "I love you so much!"