All Comments on 'Getting into Hot Water'

Commas come after the dialog. You had none. Maybe you should look at the real writers on here and see how they do it. That's all I'm going to tell you. Figure the rest out on your own.

Thanks for the contribution. Don't mind the writing police on the site. From a story perspective I would have loved to have seen a little more build up and description for the climatic scene. However, I enjoyed what you wrote even if it was short and sweet.

I would not pay attention to anonymous critics who are not constructive.

You do have some grammar issues, and I would suggest you work with an editor. Your story's scores will go up, and you will have a happier audience.

Interesting story concept and telling. A little more development would be a bit better. I felt like you went from Point A to Point C with just a wave at B as you flew by. That is just my opinion, for what it is worth. Opinions are like armpits. Most of us have a couple, and sometimes they stink, so take from this what you find helpful.

jc

Restraint. This guy apparently has none. The story itself is fairly vanilla.

The start was nice slow pace, casual, with information but not an overload. Then after seeing her boobs the pace quickened a bit fast with the sex scene coming out of nowhere and finishing quite fast. For next time you should just focus on the build up and put more detail into the sex scenes. You have quite a nice writing style though.

In this day and age, fucking your sister-in-law (who's not legally related to you in any way, shape or form) isn't regarded as a taboo activity, it isn't illegal, or frowned upon, in most cases, and doesn't even raise an eyebrow outside the immediate family; about the only response one could reasonably expect to garnish is something along the lines of 'his wife's going to kill him, this should be fun to watch!'

OK, 2 cents worth over; for what it's worth I liked it, but my feeling is it's in the wrong category, and others have pointed out the spelling and grammar issues so I won't harp on them, 3 stars, because I liked it, but it's not really my cup of tea, sorry.