by pervinplainpackage
You have an eye for detail and a style of writing that work well together. I also like the believability of your scenario and the behavior of your characters. Keep up the good work.
...with the ending. It seems as if the appropriate "reward" for uninhibited sex is the woman getting knocked up.
The story line was well conceived and executed through the consummation of the first act of intercourse. Leave your characters there, nuzzling and fondling each other, and the guy next door (like the reader) wondering what happens next
you can lose a reader very quickly when he/she is distracted by deciding whether you mean a "firm B-cup"or a "perfect C-cup" on your wife's anatomy. I find the possible pregnancy perfectly natural by assuming they were trying to start a family.