Grandma and Jack: The Whole Story

"A slutty woman though," Joan told the reflection in the mirror before she put her nightie on and headed to bed.

In the moments before sleep came Joan wondered whether to tell her friend Audra about what had happened. Maybe parts of it, Joan mused. Audra was a far more promiscuous woman that Joan, but what would she think of her if she told her what she did and where she did it?

Maybe I'll tell her about the cabbie, Joan thought. She was the one that told me about not picking one of the black men from the Christian Dating Website because they were so big down there.

The cabbie's penis was pretty large, mused Joan, but no bigger than her late husband Herb's had been, and as she dropped off she wondered whether he had been looking down at her tonight from heaven. What would he have thought about all that? He would have liked that night last weekend with Audra, that much was for sure.

***

With a friend like Audra...

"I'm just saying that since you haven't been with a man in so long you might want to pass on the black guys," Audra suggested as they looked through the ads on the website. "They're hung like horses, and that might rip you up inside."

"Audra, I'm not having sex with a man on a first date," Joan said as she felt Audra's breast against her arm while her busty friend leaned over her shoulder to look at the computer, and she was starting to regret letting Audra help her pick out an ad to respond to. "That's something you would do."

"We'll see - hey - do you have any more of that Jack Daniels?" Audra asked.

"Yes, there's another bottle I bought earlier today in the back of the cupboard," Joan said as she kept scanning the photos of men, looking for someone nice, and when Audra came back she had the bottle with her and poured a couple shots.

"Cheers," Audra said.

"Are you going to be alright driving?" Joan asked.

"Actually I was kinda hoping that you'd ask me to stay over," Audra said.

"Wanna stay over?" Joan quipped, and then pointed at the screen. "He looks nice enough."

"His name is Bernie," Audra remarked. "I did a guy named Bernie once. Horrible in bed."

"That doesn't mean this guy is too, and besides..."

"I know, you aren't going to bed with him," Audra said in finishing her sentence. "It says he's 55 but he's lying. Probably in his forties trying to pick up a cougar. He looks like Jason Alexander."

"A cougar? What's a cougar?"

"I am and you might be," Audra explained. "It's a old woman looking for young fresh meat. You have got to think younger. Most of the guys our age can't even get it up any more."

"I just want to meet a nice man."

"Sit on the couch and hold hands while watching Golden Girls?" Audra snapped. "Get with it Joan. It's 2012. You want sex as bad as I do. Only difference is that I haven't put my pussy in mothballs since my old man died. You've mourned enough, girlfriend. Pick a guy, let him take you to a motel and fuck his brains out."

"Bernie it is," Joan sighed when she realized Audra was of no help. "Now what should I tell him about myself?"

"Tell him you're a foxy thing who's 55 with a smoking hot body," Audra said. "Slinky and sexy."

"But I'm 62, I'm skinny and my breasts droop," Joan said. "I'm not going to start out a relationship with a lie."

"Suit yourself, but you have to promise to tell me everything that happens on your date, okay?" Audra asked, and Joan reluctantly agreed.

An hour and two more drinks later Joan announced that it was time to turn in.

"The sheets on the guest room bed are clean," Joan said.

"Why don't I climb in bed with you?" Audra suggested. "Be like a sleepover back in the schooldays."

"No pillow fights though," Joan said as they went into the master bedroom.

"Do you have anything I can wear?" Audra asked, and when Joan pointed over to the dresser where she had some extra night clothes she saw Audra was taking off her bra.

Wish I had those, Joan mused as she looked at Audra's gigantic bosom lurch out of confinement, and while her friend had put on a few pounds over the years, nobody would look at the thickness in your waist when those breasts were there.

Must be nice to be so wild and carefree, Joan though, because while Audra was only a couple years younger than her, she acted like they were decades apart.

"This won't cut it," Audra announced, and when Joan looked back she saw that the nightie Audra had squeezed into looked like it was ready to burst at the chest.

"Just don't breathe - or move," Joan said with a laugh, and then did a double take when she glanced down.

With the nightie so small on Audra, it had ridden up so that her sex was exposed, and while Joan had seen her rather exhibitionist friend naked many times, something was definitely different.

"What's wrong, Joan?" Audra asked after she pulled the ill-fitting nightie up over her head.

"What happened?" Joan asked. "Down there I mean?"

"The hair? Oh, I get it waxed. Hair is out of fashion these days," Audra declared, running her hand over the smooth mound. "Most guys like a smooth pussy. You ought to get it done."

"Heavens no," Joan replied, and then Audra brought Joan over to the dresser mirror and stood behind her, and although her friend was naked and Joan was wearing a bra and panties, Joan was the one who was acting like she was the naked one.

"You might want to at least trim this," Audra said as she reached down and played with the brown hairs that grew outside of what the panties covered. "Don't want to scare Bernie."

"He's likely never going to see it," Joan said, blushing at her friend's bawdiness as she brushed her hair back. "Maybe I'll get my hair cut though. Boost the silvery look a bit."

"This too," Audra laughed as he grabbed Joan's elbow and raised it high, exposing the spray of brown hair under her arm. "That's 60's stuff."

"I will if this turns into something," Joan giggled, trying and failing to lower her arm. "No sense dusting under bed if nobody looks there."

"Just kidding you," Audra said as she let her fingers slide under Joan's arm. "Back when I was in college I let my armpit hair grow, and I was hairy as a bear - like you. I had a boyfriend who loved it. Know what he liked to do?"

Joan jumped when Audra came around her side and kissed her from just above her rib cage all the way through her underarm and up to her bicep.

"What are you doing?" Joan said, and after Audra emerged from under her arm, she added with a giggle, "You're drunk!"

"So what?" Audra said. "I'll bet you liked it too."

"You're being silly," Joan said as she felt her bra get undone so quickly she didn't notice until it was hanging limply in front of her, and then it was sliding off her shoulders.

"Pitiful," Joan muttered as she tried to cover her breasts with her hands, but Audra lowered her hands to her sides and then slid her own hands up Joan's arms.

"Gravity does that to all of us," Audra said as she looked over the shorter friend's shoulder at their image in the mirror.

"Not to you though," Joan said softly.

"Bullshit," Audra whispered. "You've got an amazing body for your age. I'd trade in a minute. You're so sexy and slender."

"Audra..." Joan said as she felt her friend's breasts against her back as Audra had her hands on Joan's shoulders, kneading them lightly.

"Remember that night when the guys tried to get us drunk to get us to make out with each other?" Audra asked.

Joan remembered. It was something that their husbands used to joke about a lot, only Joan suspected that they weren't joking. Her late husband in particular used to talk about Audra's breasts all the time, and if Herb was looking down on them he would be in heaven in more ways than one because Audra's bust had gotten even bigger since then.

"Yes, they wanted us to put a show on for them," Joan said. "We both said no to that."

"Actually, you said no first, and when I saw you weren't going to do it I went along with you," Audra said. "If you hadn't said no right away, I was going to give a different answer. I'll bet you remember what happened the next day, don't you Joan?"

"You came over for lunch because the boys were going off to play golf," Joan whispered as Audra's hands slid down her rail-thin arms. "We laughed about it and then you said that you wished I didn't say no because you always liked me. I told you that I liked you too..."

"But I meant in a different way," Audra chimed in.

"I told you I didn't understand, and when you explained, I told you that I never had done anything like that," Joan continued.

"You were so insecure and shy," Audra said. "Just like now. I told you that you didn't need to know anything. I told you that I would teach you."

Joan gasped as Audra's hands came over and cupped Joan's breasts, kneading the pliant orbs while nibbling on Joan's neck.

"I think you did that day what you're doing now," Joan sighed as Audra's hands squeezing her breasts while her nipples popped. "Only then my breasts didn't need hands to make them stick out. Standing there naked with you then I looked like a boy."

"Not to me you didn't," Audra said. "I practically dragged you to this room, and it was so good."

"It was," Joan whispered as Audra's nipples poked into her back.

"Then why after that - when I made moves on you - why didn't you..."

"I felt I was cheating on Herb," Joan said. "I wanted to but..."

"You aren't married anymore though," Audra said, chewing on Joan's neck while mauling her breasts.

"No, I'm not," Joan said as Audra let go of one breast to reach down to Joan's panties.

"You're soaking wet!" Audra cried out, feeling the soggy panties from the outside before sliding her hand under the elastic top and into the bush that was practically dripping.

Audra turned her friend around and kissed Joan hard, embracing her while running her hands up and down Joan's slender back, and just like that day decades ago Audra felt Joan swoon

She's like an Amazon, Joan thought as her larger friend squeezed her tight, her massive breasts crushing her chest, and then they were going over to the bed. Joan felt her panties get yanked down as her bottom hit the bedding and then Audra had her head between her legs, licking her furiously while Joan squirmed and tore at the sheets.

Joan came fast, and she heard Audra's muffled cry out as she took a blast of fluids to her face, but she didn't stop until Joan practically pried her face out from her crotch.

"Sorry," Joan said and she looked at Audra's wet face, but Audra was laughing with delight.

"Don't remember you squirting before," Audra said. "But I loved it."

Audra got up to her knees and leaned over Joan, kissing her before dangling her massive breasts in Joan's face, and she sighed when Joan's hands grabbed her left breast and started suckling on it. After she finished nursing on that one Joan went to the other one.

"Suck it hard, babe," Audra said while reached down and pulling up Joan's breasts by the nipples, stretching the loose flesh upwards while gently twisting Joan's plump nipples. "That's it."

Audra pulled her breast free and then she was climbing on top of Joan and straddling her face with her plump thighs.

Joan reluctantly let go of the huge breast she had been enjoying, and then watched as her head was surrounded by Audra's plump thighs and she was staring at Audra's sex.

How different it looked with hair as her tongue slid along Audra's puffy labia, made to look even larger without the foliage. This was the first pussy she had ever licked, and it was now going to be the second one.

The smooth mound felt much different than when it had hair on it, even though Audra wasn't all that hairy to begin with. As Joan buried her nose and mouth into the wet fold, she felt like she was doing something wrong because Audra's privates looked prepubescent.

Then again, Joan mused as her tongue hit a good spot and made Audra groan an jiggle on her face, the pussy was attached to a woman on the cusp of sixty who wore E cup bras, so the illusion wasn't true.

Audra rode Joan's face, grinding her sex into Joan's face so hard that all Joan had to do was stick her tongue straight out so Audra could rub her clit on it, and when Audra came her scream was such that even with her ears blocked with Audra's thighs it still sounded blood curdling to Joan.

"Glad the houses are spread out around here," Joan said after Audra had dismounted her face and was beside her.

"I like to make sure my lovers know when I cum," Audra said as she put her arm around Joan and let her friend's head slide under her arm and go back to her breast, suckling on it like a child. "Not as cool as they way you do it though."

"Just think, Joan," Audra said after they got out of bed to find the bottle of Jack Daniels. "Maybe next week at this time inside of eating pussy you'll be sucking cock."

"I think that tonight is about as crazy as my sex life is going to be for the foreseeable future," Joan said as they clinked glasses.

"I won't drink to that though," Audra said. "You need to get laid. Who knows, maybe after tonight you'll find yourself turning into a sex fiend."

"Me?" Joan said, laughing as she hugged Audra after downing her drink. "You're the crazy one in this room."

"We'll see," Audra sighed while Kissing the top of Joan's head. "We'll see."

***

And it wasn't even a month ago...

Joan looked long and hard at the bottle of Jack Daniels in the back of the cupboard, which was about 3/4 full. She had a lot to do. She had to get the house tidied up for when Timmy was visiting in a week or so, and then Audra was coming over to help her pick out a guy from that Christian Seniors dating website she had just joined.

"Maybe just one little drink," Joan said aloud to the empty house, a habit she had acquired in the lonely years, but after the cap wouldn't come off, the result of it being untouched since Herb passed, she set it down.

"Maybe that's a sign from above," Joan declared and she looked upwards before letting warm water pour around the cap. "Maybe somebody is telling me not to drink. Is it you Herb, or it is the man?"

"There you go," Joan chirped as the cap came free and she sniffed the contents. "Shame to let all of this go to waste. Just one little drink for old times sake. What harm can that do?"

***

thank you for reading