by qhml1
What a fantastic twist It is almost in "Saddletramps "class well done (Jaybee186)
Messed with the wrong family! I get that some or all of their victims would have hideous financial problems, but none of the kidnapped kids were killed. I can even understand the suicide, depending on mental health and financial stress. But three divorces? Over finances? Yes all eight women were raped. But no husband is worth a piss if her divorces over his wife being forced and blackmailed with their child's life at stake. Anyways the MC (the wife and mother) was amazing.
Haha…. Another great story. Never piss off mama bear. Guess the bad guys should have researched thier target better?
Thanks for sharing.
"Biting off more than you can chew" and "hoisted upon their own petard" come to mind 😆 BardnotBard
Shooting the kidnapper is stupid, they wouldve killed the kid if they were a real kidnapping group.
You have to wonder why "Dave" let her go to her bedroom alone. He should have gone with her and checked her purse. Never send an armadillo to do a humans job. No disrespect intended toward armadillos.
LMJ
Part of me wants to say YEAH! Shoot that guy’s wang dang doodle off! Another has me thinking it’s a bit cavalier with the firearms. If someone threatened my kid, you bet I’d pull the trigger. However my my nastiest weapon is a sling shot. Unc Sam taught me to use a few, but never saw the attraction. Too much trouble keeping ‘‘em cleaned and store right. Anyone that needs a gun should have one. Ain’t me, but if LA traffic gets any worse, maybe..
Nuther ten on the five scale. Bathroom break and off to your next story…
I liked when she got her pistol the first thing she did was a disabling shot. Never give them a chance to get free.
A bit far fetched but still liked it. Well written as are your stories & easy to read. Liked that they got what they deserved. 4 stars
You never cease to amaze me as I work my way through your collected stories. I haven't found one yet I considered to be less than a '4' if not a '5' rating.
I'm somewhat jealous of your continued demonstrated skill as an author, being a "wannabe" writer myself !
I've done some techical, marketing, & promotional writing, but am currently sublimating an urge to purge myself of the debris of a very dysfunctional family over the last 50+ years.
I think it might be of interest, as the life of a screwed-up Boomer could be good for a few chuckles.
Maybe it's time to try... maybe here, just to 'get my pen wet' !
LOL.. I look forward to finishing your list and then watching for the new stuff... for a long time to come !
Real life? In Vietnam second tour gunner on Huey gunship. A sau valley. Saw recon refuse to get out of the helicopters carrying them saying they saw VC. I didn't see any. Another time platoon against overwhelming strength had kicked ass before we arrived. Cousin in green beret shot and left crawled back by himself. Crew chief in my squadron ran into burning banana boat (troop transport) and carried out wounded and dead. Silver star although I personally thought worth medal of honor. Saw and sometimes heard guys lose it other times bravery exceeded my imagination. Don't know but usually if know someone armed means it most people cave.
Anonymous from 9 moths ago is an idiot. When you start shooting off body parts on a kidnapper, they become very compliant as you move closer to their balls. No one wants their balls shot off!
@The Anon guy who says "..well my man in real life if she would have acted that way you would have a dead boy on your hands"!
To him goes my rejoinder thusly:
My man, you yourself need to be re-educated about what you perceive Reality turns out like. I say this - never try and guesstimate real life into surefire certainties.
Besides, you should never also underestimate the extent and/or possibilities a loving mother/parent will react unwaveringly with when witnessing their very child as innocent prey to any dangerous situation.
To illustrate, you only have to google up recent August 2021 news among which is the amazing incident of how a WOMAN FOUGHT TOOTH AND NAIL WITH A MOUNTAIN LION WHICH WAS CARRYING HER CHILD OFF IN ITS FANGS, AND FOUGHT IT HARD ENOUGH TO RESCUE HER PROGENY IN ALMOST ONE PIECE AND TO ALSO SEND THE FREAKED OUT PREDATOR SCAMPERING FOR ITS LIFE!
Great pace and flow. My interest never wained. No extraneous filler. I almost felt sorry for the perpetrators.
the editors, i mean.
good grammar, just the odd typo.
good story, thanks
ano you say she made all the right choices well my man in real life if she would have acted that way you would have a dead boy on your hands
i did realy like the story tough was very fresh and fun
Awesome tale!!! A woman with guts and willing to protect her family and be true to her husband!!!
These stories usually involve some really stupid behavior. Glad to see someone making all the right choices.
Good story 4 stars
by Anonymous
10/19/17
Movie title.
What was the title of the movie? I'm intrigued now.
The movie is "Trapped", released in 2002
Just dumb bad luck! They will never forget her! Unforgiving Mother on steroids
Thanks for sharing this Fantastic story with us! ★★★★★ WOOF
Focused like a laser and an overwhelming point of indefatigable determination to protect their family under all circumstances. Smart Criminals have nightmares about encountering a mark of this caliber presented in this story. Dumb criminals bump along til they don't. Thanks for sharing qhml1.
I Had A Bit Of A Laugh And That Made My Day Good Job Buddy More,Grease To Your Elbow.
The kidnappers made a major mistake by having one of their team members show up at the house. He immediately made himself vulnerable to exactly what happened. That only works if the kidnap team member is expendable. It would have been more effective to call her and show her a live picture of her son, then make demands. With all the high-tech means available to the husband, they probably would have been caught shortly after, but at least they had a little more time before getting caught. Otherwise, I really enjoyed the story. The moral of this story: when you get pushed, push back hard and play for keeps. And you don't have to kill someone to get what you want. Just start with lesser body parts and work your way up to major limbs. Somewhere along the line, they will do what you say or suffer the consequences.
and foremost of all make sure you know how to plan A & B, TK U MLJ LV NV
Thanks for this little bit of fluff! I didn't laugh out loud, but I sure did chuckle a lot!
Just what I needed to brighten up my day!
re:
Ignoring some plot holes (especially how they got the wifes cell phone if the husband actually is that into security)
------------------------------------------
Actually they didn't need her cell phone physically in their possession, just to know what the number was.
It's called spoofing, where you use a false number or someone else's number to make a call.
Not terribly complicated, there's an app for it.
was ex anything tactical. From the sound of the accent coming through when she was stressed I would say she is from East Texas, but attitude wise I would say she was from South Central or West Texas. Girls learn to shoot early on here and having a Ruger .22 wouldn't be out of character for such a person. Very deadly, great for precision shooting, you know, toes and such and fairly inexpensive to buy. The calm and capable part could come from upbringing or having been married to a Special Ops kind of guy for a while.
I think this is one of the best written short stories I have ever read, got enough information across for a novelette and was right to the point, no bullshit, take no shit from anyone. I personally thank you for sharing your vast talent with us. 5 stars, of course.
I was sure at the end you would reveal that Melinda was also in the armed forces explaining how she could stay so calm while they had her son. Even with all that tech and support something could still happen to her son and she would realize that. So, in less she was trained, it would be difficult or impossible for any civilian to stay in control in a stressful situation when your child's life is at stake. Great story, I love it when manipulating bastards underestimate someone and pay for it. Thank you for the entertainment
I have two family member [US MARINES] just back from a combined seven tours of Kuwait, Iraq and Afghanistan. Remember the night the entire world watched on CNN as American Military lit up Baghdad like the 4th of July? One family member was there. Remember when the US Military found over 35 MIGS buried just off the airfield at al Taqqadum? The other family member was there. He was also involved personally in the search for Osama bin Laden. He has assured me that what the Major and his team accomplished in this story are indeed accurate.
Actually our youngest son CWO4 82nd Airborne with 6 combat tours,18+ years and a very special MOS could pull off just such a mission and I know I would not care to be the target of his ire. Great story,very possible. !!!
Ignoring some plot holes (especially how they got the wifes cell phone if the husband actually is that into security) great flash story and what an amazing wife.
Not like q's other stories. Great flash story, though.
The idea that they got away with eight kidnappings really horrified me. Also,
there was the question of how they could obtain all that financial information.
Most enjoyable.
Sometimes you get the bear, sometimes the bear gets you.
A previous comment said the Ruger is a poor choice, but if you look at one then think about raking that hooked front sight across a cheek you will see that it is the perfect choice.
especially if you don't know what awaits, TK U MLJ LV NV
A very entertaining story. It is different and I like different. I really enjoy your characters and these are 2 of your best. This is a story that I wish was longer because I didn't want it to end, but I don't know if longer would be better. You have a great imagination and gift for plots and characters. Short but sweet.
You have created a throughly delightful scenario, Personally, I think with a little plot stretching, it would make a great movie! Now I have no idea how you could stretch your story further than its present near perfection, but I think you could figure something out. Either way, it was a GREAT story!!!!
If someone writes a story about one family member getting ahold of unsecured gun & shooting friend or relative, we'll have the statistically more likely scenario. In terms of propaganda err ...story presentation, I must concede this was very well done. Only those with Leni Riefenstahl's talent could have done better.
Not that there is anything wrong with a ruger, I own one myself, but a serious Target pistol would more likely be a hammerili or a perini
Dub & anon., when guns were banned in England a few years ago the liberal press around the world hailed it as a great breakthrough, but guess what? The crime rate in England leapt up 200% and the armed robbery 300% or better--the only ones putting out those figures are the police, not the press. Hell, WHO WOULD be afraid to rob any kind of store if they knew there was no way the owners could be armed. Keep dreaming and denying. When concealed carry was introduce first in Florida, where senior citizens had been targeted, robbery dropped to about 10% of what it had been, but once again you don't see that in the papers or on the news. Owning a gun saved my life from a man who had come to kill me in the mistaken belief that his wife was with me on a business trip. And no, I didn't shoot him, but had him arrested. You have the right to any belief you wish but, please don't be those asinine ninnies that say "My mind is made up. Don't confuse me with facts." Great story by the way. A solid 5.
Go ahead & name those countries with more restrictive gun laws than we (USA) have that have a higher crime rate, violent or otherwise. All you need here to be able to purchase a gun is a clean record & proof you are legally entitled to drive a motorized vehicle. Not much in the way of restriction at all. Spend any time at all on our countries roads & Tavadelphin, you must get a real warm rosy feeling, knowing that the idiot whos doing 60 in a school zone can in all probability buy a firearm. We lead the world in violent crime, my friend.
Even allowing for the occasional situation where a legal weapon owner is victinmized by their own weapon -
There are far more examples of them protecting their own and surviving without injury - and even more incidents where the proper application of the deterrent results in no further attempt of the crime in the first place.
No matter how hard you might like to argue the point - the p;laces where the most violent crimes take place are the places where the laws against firearms ownership or self protection are the most restrictive - it is no guarantee but it is a lot closer than the nearest patrol car - remember when LA declared it is not the job of the police to protect the people - just the city???
As for his story - nicely done - very realistic response from a smart prepared woman and mother - then Dad got well pissed. A thief is not interested in giving up his ;life to protect his little criminal enterprise - the gain must be worth the price or they run. They might try to get even later but in this case they never got the chance -
Great tale. The morale here? Don't fuck with a dedicated mother. Especially one with high connections.
An entertaining bit of fluff, but a little over the top.
For those seeing this as an endorsement for less restriction on gun ownership, I don't think so. Especially anonymous who says he's Indian and believes that free gun ownership would result in less rapes, you couldn't be more mistaken.
Gnf, i agree with you 100%. Im an indian. If you guys watch international news you would know the problem of rapes that we have here. It doesnt take a genius to figure out that if we had different gun laws then the situation would have been different. World governments should check WHO they are giving weapons to instead of banning them as a whole.
Good story. When one considers the kidnaping crisis in Mexico and Central America, this is a very much a viable scenario.
Now for those on the left, how would you have handled it? I know, issue the woman a whistle or have her call 911. The President will respond with a Seal Team and take credit for the take down. Sorry to bring up politics, however this woman was only doing what every real mother would do. Don't believe me try and get between a bear cub and its mother, your chances ZERO. Try and get between a pioneer mother and her child or children and you won't be shot with politically correct ammunition, just pure lead. Outside of the cities the women defend their families like a mother bear, don't believe me then try the above and see the outcome. Now in the gun free zones like Chicago, the answer is a little bit different. They bury the children, last year alone more than 60 children, more than 3 times the Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting of 20, were buried. The lefts answer is to disarm innocent civilians and issue call numbers or whistles. I prefer the old days. Great story, need more like it.
Never mess with a mother's child. Even worse never mess with a grandchild. Mothers will hurt you, grandmothers will torture you.
Good read for a change of pace.
Thanks for sharing. This mother was not someone to play with about her kid!!
Improbable revenge fantasy. Will probably be a made-for-TV movie by next week.
one of the very best writers on the site. thank you for always coming through