All Comments on 'I Do Only Means Maybe If Your Lucky'

by Slirpuff

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  • 160 Comments
lokiloslokilosalmost 15 years ago
Good work

Another great story from one of my new favorite authors. I'm not big on tenses and grammar, just whether or not the author gets their point across. And in all the stories of yours I've read, they always do.

I do have to admit that it was nice not having to re-read certain parts to make sure I knew who was talking.

C_frommnC_frommnalmost 15 years ago
Sex Pre-Nup

Gotta Love the Idea of a Sex Pre-Nup it takes all of the Guess work out of Your Sex Life Either You or Someone Else with You paying the Penalty for Saying "NO"

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
This was better, but

the writer lost his way in the middle and confused first and third person again. This mistake seems easily corrected, but this writer is having a hell of a time. Also the title is wrong! "If you are lucky" contracts to "if you're lucky". This writer was not lucky with his choice of an editor. The plot and concept were good, so keep working, but English is a real challenge thus far.

bruce22bruce22almost 15 years ago
Three great stories

nicely stitched together! I have no problem with this, many novels are one general plot filled with short stories. You know I did not get lost once this time around. In fact I will have to check back to find out what our colleague was talking about! I agree, turning things explicit helps a lot in life... Very good writing and great ideas!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Gfeat Story

Very nice. Please keep writing. Please ignore the English Major comments. Could he do beter? I doubt it. Where are his stories.

My wife is an Enlish Major. She constantly publically corrects my verbage, I would add a paragraph on it to the pre nup.

Thank you for your efforts.

Roger

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Choose a real editor

The one you used did you few favors.<p>Okay, look, the anti-literates blow their stacks over those of us who bitch and moan about little unimportant stuff like grammar, punctuation, and so forth. But tell me: is is REALLY so hard to grasp the difference between "your" and "you're" -- and right there in the title, no less?!<p>The protagonist is Steve, and he starts out by telling it in first person: "I did so and so" and "I did thus and such." Then, for some reason, "Steve did this and that." That makes the reader have to figure out if there's another Steve all of a sudden.<p>I'm amused by the poor quality control, and simultaneously put out by the total seventh-grade-dropout approach to writing. Author, if you don't care about your own writing enough to re-read the damned thing, and maybe pick out some of your own problems, no editor is going to be sufficient.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Fun almost spoof of a story

Thanks for your efforts. I enjoyed the story, albeit in a tongue-in-cheek manner. I want to join with the others who urge you to get a good editor. The mistatkes that have been pointed out pull me out of the story and place my focus on the text itself. This distracts me from your story. It is frustrating but I try to get beyond it as long as the story is as good as your stories have been. If you get this polished a bit it would have been a 100% Thanks for your efforts! Ttom

Risq_001Risq_001almost 15 years ago
Actually, I liked this one much better (^_^)

<p>I laughed out loud. And what's funny is that most of us guys, knowing what we know now, and if we could take it into the past with us and get a fresh do over, would do the <i><b>EXACT SAME THING</b></i> as the main character.</p>

<p>This story made me cringe at time, and at other times made me laugh, but by the end it made me say "Yeah, that's why it often sucks to be trapped in a marriage where you don't see eye to eye on what the other feels is important.</p>

<p>Not to pick on the ladies, but men and women don't see eye to eye, and to be honest that is what is the problem. I'd like to pick on one side or the other, but to be honest there jerks in both genders so it's not fair to single out just women or men, but to be honest I'd like to say:</p>

<p><b><i>FANTASTIC STORY</i></b></p>

<p>Thanks for posting it!</p>

-Risq

JADED_ONE1969JADED_ONE1969almost 15 years ago
Very good story.

A fun read as well. Okay a little off the wall but on the whole very good.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Man turns his back on his family

'for better or worse'

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
The Anony that did the for better or for worst

You might remember that marriage is a legal contract. One both parties agree to and in many states sexual relations is defined as part of the contract. When a woman, basically unilaterally, decides no sex she in fact violates the contract. Men equate, love, lust, marriage, and family, as part of the whole. His wife was a lazy woman who only really thought of herself. He didnt leave his family, he took his family with him, he divorced the woman who broke the marriage contract. Wow, shame the wife didnt realize her "duty" since she really didnt love her husband was sex with him for better or for worst! Sex lust and love are biological functions not mental mechanisms.

Risq_001Risq_001almost 15 years ago
I have to say this to the Anon below me (^_^)

<p>Say WHAT!</p>

<p>It amazes me what people see when they read a story. The problem wasn't that he turned his back on his <i>family</i> it was that the wife wasn't interested in being a equal <i>partner</i> in the marriage any more. She didn't want to talk to him, she wanted to dictate how <i>they</i> were <i><b>both</b></i> going to live their lives. You know a partner and you get together and <i>discuss</i> things. And she decided to do it without any of his input at all. She wanted to just tell him how it was going to be and expected him to shut up an go along with it. </p>

<p>So if I read you right, the husband was the more evil of the two because he decided he wasn't going to live a life without sex and love, and the wife wasn't, even though she <i><b>ALONE</b></i> decided in the story what was best <i>for them <b>both</b></i> and wouldn't change. I mean twin beds?!?! Without talking to him? Com'on!</p>

<p>God I hope your not a man. And if you are, god knows you have never lived through this or you wouldn't sound so stupid when you comment</p>

-Risq

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Why not?

liked the idea.

digdaddyrichdigdaddyrichalmost 15 years ago
Don't laugh, It could have happened

I think that this story isn't too far off of the beaten path, It could have happened. I do think that the prenuptial agreement has it's merits. It's better to know where you stand on every level of marriage, than to find out that your spouse was playing games with you when you were courting them before marriage. A good story and I enjoyed reading it.Thanks................Rich

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
if there isn't a real thing like yhis 'pre-nup'...

...then there damn well should be. as we get older, we may slow down but not stop. this will part of my next marriage. bet on it. great job!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Really Funny--Yhank You

Oh, that should be "Thank you." Pardon my spelling... :)

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Thanks

to Puff the Magic Husband, who has FINALLY served us up a truly Loving Wife in Carla. BUT, did you really have the nuts and guts to do it in real life?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Marriage-the Art of the Deal

Being married (to the same woman) for 36 years, as a 50 something male, I think this story is SPOT ON! However, to be fair to the female gender, they may not even be aware of the issue because as they age, especially after menopause and/or having ovaries removed, they lose any desire for physical/ sexual contact, and are not even aware THEY changed. But the man in their life did not change, he still expects SOME level of physical and sexual conduct, because he NEEDS that to feel whole. For those also suffering this stage of life, you may enjoy "The Sex Starved Marriage" by Michele Weiner Davis (Yes, my wife did read it and she HATED it, how is that for a rousing endorsement!). Good luck one and all, but someone please tell me how to get through this with MY needs met and sane. Thanks a million.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Very nice

A funny and thought provoking story. No POV problems that I recall either!

thomwthomwalmost 15 years ago
I Can Relate!

A very good story indeed! Married over 30 years I can relate to the twin beds, as I went down that path as well. The master king bed came back but the wife went to a seperate bedroom - going on five years now. Oh if one could only see the future, how decisions would be different!

gatorhermitgatorhermitalmost 15 years ago
Excellent story; well written and to the point

SP nailed this one. Interesting that Ann tried to blow him off. Great to have a non-wimp husband. I agree with the other comments that the POV problem is not evident with this story. SP - best story yet! Please keep writing.

froghillsfroghillsalmost 15 years ago
AMEN

Good read, and lots of subtle humor. After my divorce (20years of disappointment) I refused to be put out to pasture again. Either my women put out or they get out. I went to dating only redheads, which solved most of my earlier sexless life. My new girl is insatiable and she's over sixty, pierced, nudist, and beautiful. Life can be good if you don't let the pussy control you, but you better be ready to be a man.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Better!

Interesting story, not your generic cliche-filled cheating wife story. And the grammar has markedly improved. Thanks for taking the effort to make your story more readable. That said, there are still flips between first and third person, and your vs. you're confusion. The author or the editor should search for every use of your or you're and check to make sure the usage is correct. That would probably take five minutes.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
about the sexless marriage Book

as the poster below said this book <b> "The Sex Starved Marriage" </b> by <u> Michele Weiner Davis </u> is very unpopular with SOME women/ wives. And the great thing about the book is that you can tell how much trouble your marriage is in by the REACTION your wife has to the book.

<br></br>

To be sure not every thing Michele Weiner says it correct IMO. But a lot of it IS correct. Yet MOST wives when reading the book reaction with extreme emotions and well hate.

<br></br>

women/wives in middle age cut off the sex for TWO reasons and ONLY two reasons. 1)POWER 2) they are going through Menopause and the wives have turned inward while demand that their husbands "accept things for a while" which often can be 2 to 10 years.

Harryin VAHarryin VAalmost 15 years ago
The Best story yet from this author : But

clearly this is the BEST story yet from this author. That being said I am not sure how taking the 1st wife back helps. She is after all the reason for the pre-nup tactic in the first place.

<br></br>

if you have to have legal definitions of sex spelled out because your former wife or current fiancee does NOT want to give up too much control in the marriage...

<br></br>

its isnt a real marriage anyway.

Vulcan_in_OhioVulcan_in_Ohioalmost 15 years ago
Getting better; I think the editor helped a lot.

Not all errors were caught but this story seems 80% better grammatically than your earlier stories. I like the fresh ideas, or the different ways in which ideas are presented, that come with a new author. Of course, Steve was the first to cheat (unless Carla really had a secret boyfriend unbeknownst to the readers let alone Steve). I think Steve should have hired a P.I. to check her out. If she wasn't cheating on him, and she truly had no sex drive, then he should have insisted that she see a doctor to get checked. We are all sexual animals; our needs vary but all adults need physical intimacy. There are some who repress it, there are some who can't get it, there are some who are incapable due to physical handicaps (or mental ones), but the need still exists. In marriage, most times it is the woman with the lower sex drive but again, it can vary. Still, if a person loves his or her partner, what is wrong with making love to that partner even if he/she does not feel in the mood at that particular time? If your partner asks for the salt, or the butter, or a glass of water (and you are near the faucet), because you care for the other person, you are pleased to do something for that loved one. Is it such a big burden for a spouse to spend 15 or 20 minutes 2-3 times/wk making the other partner feel good, in fact, making that partner feel loved? So in this sense, I sympathize with Steve (I guess also because I'm a married male . . . ). But Steve did bring an escort home, which technically might get custody denied him, since his kids could have walked in on the situation. I know he was basically throwing down the gauntlet and saying the marriage was over, but morally it was still wrong and could have blown up in his face. I also agree with the reader who was critical of his getting back with Carla. How was it possible for her to even be invited to the wedding with Ann? That plot hole could use a bit of tidying up. Thanks for writing.

TE_RossTE_Rossalmost 15 years ago
A good read

I enjoyed the easy style and flow of this story. It was a good read.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
Good story and oh so true

This story may as well be describing me in the first half. I totally relate, though I garantee when I divorce it will be forever.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 15 years ago
wish i had thouhgt of that

I sure wish i had had thought of that. Single guys take notice. Dont be "young ,dumb,& full of cum"-- it definitely changes after the wedding cake. Great story. I was an English major also. Just keep submitting in English, I think must of us can muddle thru. Thanks again for a fun read.

RonRWoodRonRWoodalmost 15 years ago
Loved it

Boy, I wished that I had done something like this before my second marriage! My new young wife stayed interested for about one year. Then I realized that she didn't enjoy sex period. It was just a duty to her...though she would not admit it for twenty years! She never argued about it, just made sure I was always asleep before she came to bed most of the time! She would never dress sexy to entice me either. Wore sweats to bed a lot. Said she was cold. What was sad was that she was a beauty and loved the attention men gave her when we went out. She just didn't want sex with me or anyone else either. I could never accuse her of cheating and she would never admit she didn't want sex. I just knew...

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
Pretty Good

I loved the story, and especially the end! I only have one little bone to pick. I see this a lot in lit stories and it irritates me. Although I know this is fiction and that you authors try to build on the effect of getting rid of the spouse... How in the the world do you expect readers to believe that you can get a restraining order issued to keep the spouse away from the kids, the house, and the husband? Restraining orders are only issued when there is a threat of violence or sexual abuse to one or more of the parties named. In no case can you change locks and keep a spouse away from the family home without a hearing before a judge and a filed writ of separation first! I know this for a fact after 45 years of law enforcement experience and training. Now, if a spouse leaves on their own volition and abandons the home then you have a case to present at a hearing but not until... Winterfrog from Sweden appears to be the only author that knows this! Community property is exactly that. You damn sure cannot keep the wife restrained from seeing the children without cause and a court order! I am sorry but it is irritating to see author after author throw this out as some kind of additional legal punishment for the opposing spouse in their stories. You cannot claim endangerment to the children for a wife holding out on her husband! In all acuality bringing a prostiture into the home with children present is the only legal cause for a restraining order that I read. And for some commenters that claim that laws are different in each state...don't bother because all laws in all states are based on case law formed at the Federal and State levels and apply to all states! Sorry for the rant... Lt.Ron Wood NMSP

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
There was an editor?

Sack him, he didn't do his job. As for the story - better than some of your work but not the best.

AnonymousAnonymousover 14 years ago
ok.

this makes two of ..... you are trying. keep at it........ok.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 14 years ago

Please use the word "damn" less often, learn to use fricking, fucking, infernal, idiotic, maddening, etc. There are many more adjectives in the English language.

0649d0649dover 13 years ago
vulgar prenup

If it just left out the bit where each had to pay for the other's sex and instead just set a minimum number of sex sessions per week or divorce, then it would have been alright cos the husband would surely feel jealousy if the wife got screwed and he should consider how the wife feels seeing the husband get screwed. sure they could just give in but in actual fact jealousy and arousal are two different feelings and do not go together if there are biological or psychological reasons for lack of arousal. it would only break one of the spouse's heart if they were unable to have sex but humiliated by having to see the other having sex. i can only hope the husband has compassion and doesn't hold the wife to the contract.

AnonymousAnonymousover 13 years ago
I guess volunteer editors are worth what they're paid...

Quotes: when someone starts to speak you open a quote...when they stop you CLOSE THE QUOTE. If they pause and start to speak again, you open another SET of quotes.

Example:

"I don't know how to use quote marks," I said to the teacher, "could you give me a few pointers?" I was a bit embarrassed to be in a college grammar course and find I didn't know as much as I thought I did. "I guess I should have paid more attention in high school," I added as the instructor started to explain.

"It's not that hard at all once you know the basics," the instructor said, walking over to my desk...

If someone else starts to speak, ALWAYS start a new paragrpah.

It gets tiresome trying to find where someone stopped talking...

Good story except the ending was over the top.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 13 years ago

This guy is a real douche. Don't know who would want to marry him anyway. His wife denies sex two days because of cramps (sorry men but at times they DO HURT) and he brings an escort into their home?

thunderfoot1959thunderfoot1959over 12 years ago
Great story - close to realistic in some cultures

Supposedly, Aristotle Onassis's prenup with Jackie Kennedy included provisions for sexual conduct. In the US, some states had laws that set a minimum "entitlement" for a married couple's sexual contact (Virginia lad set twice a month).

The purpose of these provisions and laws was a stereotypical balancing of the husband's desire/need for sex with protection of the wife from unreasonable sexual demands by her husband. The societal benefit was to promote and strengthen marriage.

The proofreading on the story could be better, as the notes on quotes indicate. Most importantly, the substitution of "You're" for "Your" in the story title would be a welcome correction. The pacing of the story could also be improved, as the last few paragraphs seemed rushed after the exposition in the previous two pages.

Overall, though, the story strikes a strong chord with this married man with a post-menopausal wife.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Idiot

To the previous anon he didn't bring in an escort because she had cramps he brought her in because she used that excuse 2weeks previously and they hadnt had sex for 8 weeks.

AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Thanks . . .

. . . for a creative solution to a common problem.

UndrApprctdUndrApprctdover 12 years ago
Fun to read

but obviously in real life he would get toasted by the legal system. Still, lots of fun.

norcal62norcal62about 12 years ago
Low score for male - again - being a coward and not talking to spouse.

Not excuses, running is the easiest for LW authors to write. Think some more.

chytownchytownabout 12 years ago
I Like!!!

This story very entertaining and funny to me. Thanks for sharing. To me this is one of your better stories.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
LOL

Still laughing, the wedding scene was great.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
dude takes everything too seriously...

As soon as he thinks the wife is in the wrong > boom > divorce, no talking, no back and forth, nothing... He even balked at Ann telling him if he cheated on her she would kick him to the curb when that's EXACTLY what happens in most of your stories only it's the wife that cheats. You are a fucking hypocrite...

monkcalmmonkcalmabout 11 years ago
great story

It seemed in the story all the affection died in the first marriage,hugs,kissing,cuddling,touching these are important signs of love to your mate and without them she/he is saying you are not their mate.So kick the non-loving fucker to the curb in this tale she was warned so to bad so sad for her.

FD45FD45almost 11 years ago
Anon: Dude takes things seriously

I am not sure which story you were reading. According to the story, he had 3 years of a practically sexless marriage. See how much you are laughing after three years of virutually no sex.

And it mentioned about a dozen times that he tried to talk to her about this. It wasn't important to her...so it wasn't important. Nice....very nice.

BUT after he lowered the boom THE FIRST TIME, she pulled the stick out of her ass for a year enough to let him get laid. And he was happy to accept that.

Then she stopped again. After being warned. After three years of conversation and a divorce threat.

AND HE STILL WAITED 8 WEEKS! And then he fucked a escort...which was ANOTHER conversation starter! Did she talk? NOPE!

So if this is a BOOM SHE'S DONE...you got some fucking slow bullets in your reality.

cantbuymycantbuymyalmost 11 years ago

you do have your moments sli.

betrayedbylovebetrayedbylovealmost 11 years ago
Damn

Jeez. This guy was so serious about the prenup that he actually married his ex-wife because she agreed to sign it. That's serious hardcore. Excellent!!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
I think the prenup idea

was an interesting hook for this story. But that said, I think this guy was a TOTAL asshole! It was very hard to like him , or empathize with his motivations, as he went along. I agree that he had been pushed to extremes with Carla, and it did seem plausible to be on guard with Ann, but he was no better at communicating with either of them then they with him. Also, EVERY one of them seemed to think that being selfish and self-centered was OK, and it seems that Carla basically decided she could finally accept his selfish ways (perhaps for her own selfish motivations-like getting back with her kids). But this sexual pre-nup was no guarantee towards happiness, and the way the story reads, it seems like they will continue to struggle, because even after the marriage counseling and divorce, he never really learned his lesson and made any changes to his personality.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
Great

About time someone wrote a story about a man. It beats the wimp and cuckold stories hands down!!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
He'll be sorry...

He didn't really think it through did he? She'll make him pay, and women can be as patient and devious as the devil himself! He will have to perform too, and women can fake arousal but men can't! If she wants to fool around with the postman or whoever she fancies, she just has to wait till he comes home drunk and can't get it up, and BAM: pre-nup clause! Hell, she just has to ask for it more times in a night than he can perform to to be allowed to fuck that new guy at the office any time she wants, and he'll have to pay for dinner and a hotel room too! Women in their forties can be insatiable, whereas the older men get the more difficult it can be to rise to the occasion, so not only can she screw around to her hearts content, he'll have to pay for it!

sugnasugnaover 10 years ago
This is a Great Idea!

I came to realize a bit to late that most of us get married without really knowing or defining what our marriage was going to be about. We all think we know what marriage is, but in truth we all have different ideas, needs and desires. We assume the other person is on board with us, until we find out otherwise. The theme of a marriage with a diminishing sex life is a common reality for many married couples. Women most often are the ones that pull back and no longer seem interested in sex with their husbands. Why is this? Most husbands love to have sex with their wives and feel rejected by their wife's lack of interest in them. From my conversations with men the cheat, this is the main reason that most men cheat. So, if marriage is treated like a contract under the law, why not go further than a prenup and write a full contract detailing all aspects of the marriage? You would never start a business with a partner(s) without such a contract, why would you start what is essentially a family business without such a contract? People live too long nowadays, you are looking at 30-60 years of partnership in most cases! So, the marriage contract should make things clearer for both parties and also should eliminate a lot of the expense and suffering of a divorce!

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
That was

quite different. My first thought was the pre-nup was nuts, but I am glad he stuck to his guns. Calling it on the alter was brilliant! After all, she was trying to blow something important to him off...so she deserved to be blown off. She actual did it to herself.

In the U.S., unless they lived in Nevada, the pre-nup probably wasn't "legal". Paying for sex is illegal and therefore not legally enforceable/binding. Morally though, it was gold. Heck, it is even biblical: Corinthians 7.5 : Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree...

EMiamiRiverRatEMiamiRiverRatover 10 years ago
Too cool

He stuck to his guns. As some might say; once burnt, twice shy. Anyone here blame the guy? Been there, done that...once.

sdc92078sdc92078about 10 years ago
The paying for sex part would have been a legal minefield

You can't contractually obligate someone to do something illegal. Would have been better for the contract to specify that the denied spouse could seek sexual gratification outside the marriage without being specific about where it came from or how. Unless Steve was willing to hop a flight to Nevada anytime he needed some.

krosis666krosis666about 10 years ago
A very unlikeable character

He is totally self-obsessed and selfish. A control freak. All he thinks about is getting his cock pleasured, and to hell with everyone else. He says he never cheated, but fucking a prostitute in front of your wife, with your kids in the next room, definitely falls into that category. He treats women like they only exist to see to his needs, while giving nothing in return. He said "Carla`s problem is that she forgot marriage is an equal partnership", but there was little or no equality, or compromise coming from his side. He was willing to break up a family, and screw up his kids, just to get a regular supply of pussy. And he was also vindictive. Why did he go to the extreme of getting a restraining order, and preventing his kids from seeing their mother, when he was the cheating son of a bitch. He stole money that should have used to raise his kids, so he could have some playing around money. Carla did nothing wrong, except that she didn`t fawn over him, and see to his every whim, on a daily basis.

Everyone likes sex, but few people are willing to become self destructive, and willing to mentally scar their kids to get it more often. It wasn`t about sexual pleasure for him, when all is said and done, it was about control, and forcing someone to his will.

Ann might have been upset, when she was left at the altar, but she will soon realise that she dodged a bullet, and Carla did her the biggest favour of her life, by taking him off of her hands.

tazz317tazz317about 10 years ago
FROM THE FRYING PAN INTO THE FIRE

and then re-decides the pan wasn't so bad, TK U MLJ LV NV

LordSlamdawggLordSlamdawggabout 10 years ago
written as a farce and should be taken as such !

As for the readers who try to break down the story as if it were a how-to matrimonial manual ? Good luck and Doh !

JounarJounarabout 10 years ago
5*

Totally insane and over the top but I enjoyed reading it :)

oldwayneoldwayneabout 10 years ago
5*****

Excellent tale, thanks so much!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago

Immature, self-centered ass wipe comes to mind real quick...the perennial jock who never grew up.

Tw0Cr0wsTw0Cr0wsabout 10 years ago
not so

He was not really immature, but in fact patient and thoughtful.

He tried talking many times with his wife, attempting to work with her for years.

After overhearing Ann telling one of her female friends that after the wedding she planned to seize control of the marriage using sex as a weapon, the prenup was a brilliant answer.

Physical intimacy is a huge part of a marriage, if it is not there all you are is roommates, illness is the exception.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
another

you never cease to amaze me with the stories you com up with. Another excelent job

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
This story was different!

But.......

"Relax, Ann. It was nothing more than a little grab-ass between friends," I told her."

And therein lies the problem with some marriages. If ANYONE believes that is OK, they don't deserve marriage. At least, not a happy carefree marriage.

Drbeamer3333Drbeamer3333almost 10 years ago
Enjoyed it

A fun tale.

fanfarefanfarealmost 10 years ago
terrific comedy of errors

Congratulations Slirpuff for writing such a clever spoof of the Loving Wives stories.

It is funny how ridiculous the trolls are, lacking even elementary reading comprehension. Maybe that should be alimentary?

You reversed all the usual cliches used to appeal to the misogynist commentators and they're too dumb to figure it out! That they are the ones being satirized by your story.

KarenEKarenEover 9 years ago
Good Story

Not sure how much was intended as satire, but the sad fact is that too many wives use sex to try to control the marriage, and if they aren't going to shouldn't have a problem with something like this pre-nup.

sugnasugnaover 9 years ago
Read it Again

The second time around it still makes sense. Sure, the the main character is unlikable, but that doesn't make him wrong. How many people enter into "deals" including marriage without anything in writing and with the notion in the back of their minds that they will continue to "negotiate" after the contract is signed? In the US heterogeneous society we all have very different expectations about what is acceptable. This leads to misunderstandings and disagreements. Why suffer the pain and cost of this foolishness. Sit down, talk it out, put it in writing. All getting married without a pre-nup does is make lawyers wealthier.

amischiefmakeramischiefmakerover 9 years ago
Cute, original, and entertaining

Need I say more? 5*

retmstrretmstrabout 9 years ago
****

I enjoyed the story. Must have cost Steve a bundle to divorce and re-marry plus no mention of the ring given to Ann. Different messed up situation. Cheers!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
That was awsome.....

55555555Sssssssssssss

bill.....

sbrooks103sbrooks103over 8 years ago
Thought

“Greg told me that Carla had told Peggy, and her friends, that I'd crawl back to her; as it was only a matter of time.” – I don’t know why she thinks that, since SHE was the one who begged HIM to come back he last time!

And now it looks like SHE crawled back to HIM!

sbrooks103sbrooks103over 8 years ago
Re-Reading

“I take care of the kids 80% of the time because she's off doing what's important to her, which leaves me out in the cold.” - If he takes care of the kids 80% of the time, why doesn’t HE get the house, kids and child support?

“Carla off my life and health insurance policies.” – I COULD be wrong, but I believe that health insurance policies are either individual or family, if he wants to cover the kids he has to cover her too.

"We're just so busy with work, the kids, and our activities” – Heaven forbid you cut back on some activities!

NOW she says to the counselor that maybe they can spice things up, but she never responded to his point about how she shot him down every time he tried to spice things up in the past.

FenixreignFenixreignover 8 years ago
@sbrooks

Health insurance plans now also have choices within the plans for dependents. You can have dependents within a "Single" plan or a "Family" plan.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Weak story!

I would suggest a prenup between the author and us readers which spares us another one of this bullshit story.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
I try not to scream...

This story insults my mind. In real life the law should state that guys like the protagonist in this story has to be castrated so he no longer has to suffer by having a blank brain that only works synchronous to his balls.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
It's Amazing

It's amazing how so many wives decide after a few years of marriage that their husbands no longer need a wife- only a housekeeper, cook, and (if applicable) a mother for the children. They don't want sex anymore, so their husbands shouldn't want it either. Suggest hubby gets his needs taken care of elsewhere and they turn into raging harridans out for blood.

If a fellow is smart, he'll go for a common-law relationship. A common-law divorce is cheap and easy, and it seems both parties work harder at making the relationship work

Tw0Cr0wsTw0Cr0wsalmost 8 years ago
sbrooks103 01/15/16

re:

Re-Reading

Did you?

Re-read it that is.

If you read it you would see that:

He did get the kids.

He did get the house.

He took her off as a beneficiary.

But yeah; if everything you do outside of it is more important to you than your marriage, do you even have a marriage?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
stupid

the stupidest story ive read from this author, and ive read may. And those of you that taught that that it was funny a cute are just as stupid and fucked up in the head as this author. Nuff said.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
You can tell...

the anon comments by the name of 'stupid', 'i try not to scream' and 'weak story' are all by the same person. It's easy to do if you happen to use a VPN or proxy.

I don't think the basis for this story is poor at all... being in a sexless marriage myself... and yes, I admit it.

For your information, it's something we have discussed ad-nauseum, argued over, and both fully acknowledge, but she is unwilling to change back to the interested PARTNER she was in the first few years.

I have TOLD her (and not in the heat of a disagreement) I need more than a few times a year, and when and if I leave, I will never remarry.

While I don't think the premise of this story is that bad, his choice to bring an escort in WAS poor, but hey, it's the author's story, and I get it, it's just not my style. I'd just set the divorce in motion and go my merry way.

As for this story, all he was asking, was for a guarantee that the partner he was committing himself to exclusively and for life, would continue to commit herself to him. He did them both a favor by exposing her dishonesty, and saving the later pain of a divorce.

It may be that the agreement would not be stuck to, to the letter... but as long as BOTH partners were happy, there would not be a problem. And isn't that what a partnership is for? To support and enrich your life together? So he has to do right by her, and she doesn't? Fuck that.

So this anony nuisance who keeps dropping negative comments is just supporting the character Ann's right to lie to, and short-change her partner, and I bet this anon is a woman. Or a cuck.

You are not fooling anyone. go whine to your girlfriends.

4 stars for a good read

artykay63artykay63over 7 years ago
whats good for the goose

Is good for the gander. Can't see the problem, a lighthearted look at a common issue. 4* for the laugh when the ex turned up to get her man back!

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Enjoyed the tale - this author is awesome.

Thank you for your efforts

Tootight1Tootight1over 7 years ago
good story

very enjoyable read. It's a bit of a fairy tale but nice.

AnonymousAnonymousover 7 years ago
Good. Very Good.

Good work 5 stars. Very creative.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 7 years ago
At last

A man with some balls.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 7 years ago
About half way through your stories--

thought it time to give you thanks and take a break. I estimate my scoring would average almost 5. Thanks again, tom anon

amischiefmakeramischiefmakerover 6 years ago
Cute and original

I really liked it. 5*

LenardSpencerLenardSpencerover 6 years ago
Spelling error in the Title... doesn't bode well! (...you're lucky)

I like your creativity and wide subject storylines. But please... PLEASE get an editor. All your stories have the same spelling/word mistakes, proving that some of those people that you state either helped you with the storyline or provided editing, simply didn't. EG The abbreviation for "you are" is "you're" NOT "your". You often use "their" for "they're". There are numerous other errors, proving that you do not use an editor. These are your most common errors, used about 30 times each story.

It's a shame because you do have writing talent and these simply detract from it.

etchiboyetchiboyover 6 years ago
Is it just me? Or does anyone else picture Joe Pesci as the protagonist?

Just asking. I think it’s his voice and accent that does it.

5-stars

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Great and

Honest slant on married life. My wife and I dated for 15 years living together for 12 of them. We had a hellacious sex life until 2 years after marriage. Then it ended. When I was 64 she stated we could make love again but it was too late. She died of Ovarian cancer 3 months later. I learned too late that u need to take care of yourself and now 2 years later a 43 year old women has shown me what sharing my bed and life should be like.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
Editor, No

His editor helps him fix plot problems(I assume). He Really also needs an English teacher/grammarian to correct his spelling, usage of certain words etc. Some his words bring my reading to a complete stop while I figure out what he does mean. JustJ

AnonymousAnonymousabout 6 years ago
How

How do you dream up such crap.?

Schwanze1Schwanze1about 6 years ago
Well that was original

and fun. At least to me. If we are going to get drunk and sing why doesn't my wife want it like she did before we married, I'm in.

sbrooks103xsbrooks103xabout 6 years ago
Late Comment

"Don't we do it enough for you right now?" - Yes, but let's not forget this little remark to the other wives: "Right now, we do it 4 to 5 times a week, but after we get married, we'll probably settle down to once or twice a week like all married couples our age."

fisheronefisheronealmost 6 years ago
Tribulations of life

It shows that people can learn from there mistakes. Ann knew that the biggest problem with first marriage was lack of sexual contact. Im glad fiancee overheard the conversation about cutting back on sex after marriage. Im also glad Carla realized what she lost and was willing to go for it and bring family back together.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago
ROFL stupid!

I applaud his courage in NOT marrying Ann. But remarry Carla? You MUST be kidding!? Carla is a known quantity. She hasn't aged well, mellowed or changed her mind. So why would he make that mistake a THIRD time? She's already shown her true colors so marrying her again makes no sense. And why is she even AT the wedding? She should have still been angry at him for divorcing her. No way in hell she attends his wedding. Sorry, but even for a fictional story this was just ludicrous. He would have been better off staying single and using Rose when he had to.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago
Now THAT was funny shit!

Mostly shit. He's going to believe Carla? She's a known quantity. She may change for awhile but in the long run? Her spots ain't changing. He must plan on using Rose a lot. Carla? Really? That has to be the dumbest ending - EVER! Who the fuck does he think he is? Richard Burton?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 6 years ago
WHEN ONE IS NOT HAPPY WITH THE SITUATION....GET RID OF IT

but if you get a chance to recover it, dont think twice, TK U MLJ LV NV

AnonymousAnonymousover 5 years ago
Agree

I agree with his actions.Despite other comments I think Carla will have learnt her lesson especially as it is obvious she hasn't remarried in the meantime.

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