All Comments on 'I invited Them, I Learned'

Mmm.got me soo hard. tell the story of alton fucking sophia and knocking her up

Aside from the need to find an editor to correct the numerous errors, this story is not enjoyable. I don't really mind the subject area, but the characters in this story are awful. One of the important points for developing a story is to have at least one character that the reader can connect with on some level. This story has no one worth being concerned with or interested in following.

I didn't know lit had a "stupid as fuck" catagory?

What man "needs" another man to help him pee when he has an erection?!? Maybe I'm missing some cultural thing, but that seemed bizarre (obviously the beginning of a bizarre-fest). This story violates my suspension of disbelief so much that it needs a rape kit. :-P

All your stories suck I don't read them just give them a 1 if I could I would give them a -1 million stars and banish you from ever submitting here again

This story was really good, but the part where she says she had sex with Alton before really ruined the whole innocence feel.

I'm not a great writer myself, but come on man, this was barely coherent. I suppose the plot could have some promise in the hands of anything other than a monkey banging randomly on a keyboard, but that's really the nicest thing I have to say about this story.

I don't know what's worse, the thought that you just slapped something together without giving a single fuck(seems to be the case considering you submitted 6 stories on the same day) or that you're really this terrible.

I try not to leave comments that aren't helpful, but there's just so much wrong here I don't even know where to begin.

Your character descriptions are confusing as hell: "He's the type of guy to first talk seriously and then makes a bad joke about it afterwards. He's also a big womanizer while I'm the white collar nine to five guy." What the hell is that even supposed to mean?,

Your spelling AND grammar are atrocious: You had numerous basic errors with words like your and you're and at one point you used acctuated where I believe you meant accentuated.

And your plot is in serious need of review. The wife acts innocent and shy the whole way through, but in fact she's been fucking Alton on the regular and planned the whole evening? I don't buy it. Either your "white collar nine to five guy" is too stupid to survive pouring a cup of coffee or the plot simply doesn't work.

I seriously considered posting this comment anonymously simply because it's so harsh. If you have any desire to become a better writer instead of just dumping out offensive trash, send me a private message. I may not be the best writer, but I'll be happy to edit this story for you just to keep stuff like this from getting posted here again.

I have been nailed to the screen and went into spasms of agony when they had the sight shutdown for tech update.

Finally got the rest of it and it's wickedly wonderful. It's a XXX version of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolfe ?"

Fantastic read, great build up, Sophia you dirty slut! Love every minute of it, I give it 5/5 tissues

Want to be in that family