by chilleywilley
What a long and boring story. Husband is a stupid stupid weakling who deserves every crapp his wife threw at him. Siriosly who talks like that? I just wonder his wife didn't cheat on him sooner. Awful dialogs. Poor writing.
2starrs
Bit too clinical. Lot of dialog that while well written, hard to believe anyone talks like that in real life with their spouse.
stupid story. he spevt way to much time with his dumbass setup to get the goods on the bitch.
5 Star
Best story on affairs. Got the dumb bitch to sign a post-nupt. Roland got divorced so there was some payback not enough but oh well. In the end he came out only losing 10k and had no love for the cunt.
5 stars because it's so funny. many good scenes, thanks for writing it.
Stupid story. Why would she push forward knowing he’s watching her like a hawk? Why did he make elaborate plans to trick her. Just divorce her and expose her. Zero blowback on Roland. Dumb
Your dialogue is stilted and unnatural. Turgid, even. Listen a little and try to get a sense of how real people speak to each other.
Or, just keep writing these awful stories about overbearing assholes, if you prefer.
Well, We-The-Readers do not have enough information to know the stage of the seduction, but if WTR go by Sweetie’s assurances to Hubby, she was seeing herself as a Good Samaritan. Even if the seduction were several steps beyond that, Sweetie’s motel words and actions were premature/unrealistic. (But convenient for Author’s/Hubby’s mission!) If WTR grant that Sweetie was already seduced at start of the tale, then Hubby shoulda just divorced her citing irreconcilable differences.
Problem … since Sweetie is never presented with Hubby’s audio-video evidence, her confession to her ‘one time’ folly makes no sense.
I reckon most of us would have got a tad irritated the way Karen kept pulling hubbies' chain but maybe he should have kept her, just for the fun of watching her porn movies on the computer site ......
Good until the non-ending. Roland got off way too easily. Should have been fired.
Should have told wife about the porn site video.
Liked the "folksy" post nuptial agreement to save lots of cash.
Just a bit short on the ending. How about her final reaction after the divorce is granted? Did she finally get it? Regrets from her? Lastly how about some real payback on Roland? Disappointing.
1st page was good trying to tell her what Roland was after and her being too dumb to realize it. Just the wording is sort of poor
This author could create a fine story except for crafting a good ending. The conclusions of his submissions, imo, all seem weak and feel hurried. My experience as an author is limited but I've always found writing naturally flowing conversation to be the most difficult aspect of producing good fiction. Since chilly's dialog is fine, however, perhaps each author's mileage varies.
Nonetheless, as an opinionated reviewer, I stand by my impression chilly never truly mastered the art of bringing his stories to a strong, satisfying conclusion. That is a shame. Otherwise, each example of his work that I've read is truly well written.
story was ok, but the ending was too short. Last 2paragraphs in particular was rushed
Did he ever retrieve the camera in room 114? No/ Bet he spent a lot of time in the lobby on the hotel wifi!
... they seemed a bit too familiar with each other in bed (of at least naked) for it having been their first time. Was it... their first time? Or did Chris just miss the earlier meets?
He saw the threat, warned her of what might happen, and she chose to embrace the danger. She got what she deserved and he got his freedom.
This line hits the nail on the head: "Your daughter apparently hasn't figured out what marriage is..." That really does say it all.
Sandra or Grace, silly mistakes and you said u have the story proofread.
Sack your proofreader, they did a lousy job
Enjoyed the story, better than your cuck stories
Just needed a bit of attention to get Sandra and Gracie sorted, but otherwise a fun dumb cheatin' bitch story. 5* for entertainment value
Honestly, this was a ridiculously annoying story. The overbearing dialogue, the condescending theme.....just utter shit.
This woman was a psychopath, almost like she had a split personality. The real question for me is, why did he ever marry this crazy selfish unethical whore to begin with? There is no indication that her personality suddenly changed (no Martian Slut Ray, thank God), and her mother didn't seem all that surprised that her daughter was being dumped for adultery.
So its looks like all involved got what they should have seen coming. Stupid unethical people live shitty fucked up lives. Thanks for one more example.
It would all point back to Roland. And make sure Roland’s wife gets the URL.
5-stars
Chris got what he wanted. A new start and all the assets.
Karen got what she wanted, freedom to be a whore and no strings to worry about.
It seems only fair that Rolly got a memento of the events. I don't know what would have really left a lasting impression on him...... Oh Yea!!! I got it. After they arrived at the hospital. Rolly was treated for being mugged and assaulted. Pretty standard damage, Broken ribs, damaged testicles.....but, the really weird thing about it was finding a Flyers hockey puck stuffed in his ass. After the surgery to remove it the hospital staff thought it only right to have put in a glass container and given to good ole Rolly. Everyone needs a little memento to remember the past by.
Her we go again another bitch in heat thinking with her cunt yes her cunt. (pussy is to good for bitches that pull this shit)
He set the trap, and the stupid white took the bait. Excellent story Chilly.
All fell into place for Chris so neatly, in a way that only works when a fiction writer controls events. Such as Karen not being scared off, but fell right back into affair Immediately after the divorce threat and the nuptial agreement, thus falling into the jaws of Chris's trap. How many divorced people wish that their divorces would have happened so "neatly"?
Still, interesting tale, well told, so hesitant 5 stars.
Paul in Oklahoma
just changed the words enabling a better balance, TK U MLJ LV NV
Usually when a Husband is strong a decisive like this a wife takes stock and backs off. If only to ascertain if her husband is serious. But the smart ones who love their spouses tend to take it to heart, and things are usually better afterwards as the strong husband has taken the lead and asserted himself in the Marriage. Things smooth out as the wife is reassured by the fact her Husband is infact a real man who will stand up to her and not let her walk all over him. Women fucking love that shit.
In marriages not so strong it can become a source of resentment. The wife has no respect for her Husband and is subconsciously shopping for his replacement. Acts of strength and resolve from him are dismissed out of hand or ridiculed by the wife. Not sure what the Husband did before this situation happened but she had clearly lost respect for him before the flower incident happened.
The wife feels a bit off though. she just comes off as insanely dense. She set her mind to cheat, even if she was fooling herself otherwise, and nothing her husband did could save the Marriage. For the rot had already set in. Good to see he was a man of his word and took care of buisness. But doesn't speak well his ability to instill confidence and project strength to his wife nor the interloper who would violate his territory.
She fucked up,couldnt keep her panties on. In the end he won.
It wasn't meant to be. Still enjoyed it, but would have liked hearing why she put she had sex with Roland in the first place.
5 Stars!
Kind of like an erotic Sherlock Holmes story.
Of course all the little pussy keyboard thumpers disagree, but we know most are lacking from good formal education past the 6th grade!
Pretty darn good story. Only problem I had with it is that I don’t believe good old Roland got the reward he so richly deserved for destroying a marriage. Or two, if you count his own. Yeah, I think old Rollie should have been rewarded with a nice long vacation. Like maybe 3 or 4 weeks in the ICU ward. Just my thoughts. D
critical anon posters be considered real life pussies/keyboard warriors? Especially the ones lacking creativity in their insults.
should hold as a warning for the biter and the bitee. TK U MLJ LV NV
Think about what happens, taking $100,000 from a cheating wife has a lot to reccomend it. Busted knuckles would be fun but a very loud ka-ching is even better.
It is amazing how cheaters think everyone except them are stupid👊🏻
He started out sounding tough! He even went as far as to threaten Roland, then he turned wimp! He knew they were in the motel room! Should have gone into the room and fucked Roland up good! Kicked him in the nuts so many times he'd never be able to fuck again! Then told her not to come home!
This story was quite entertaining. It was a good read, I actually liked it. It was well thought out and well put together. It showed that some women think they can get away with anything, and everything they want. But I'm glad that her husband has his crap together. It seems that she thought that good ole Roland knew what he was talking about, BIG MISTAKE. He knew nothing when he commented on the copy of the legal agreement she showed him. Too bad for her, but she deserved everything she got and/or didn't get. again good story 4 stars for you.
Forgiveness for the past is not license for the future.
He gave her amnesty for what she did, not permission to do it again.
A judge would consider that fair.
A contract based on no future infidelity which she broke within a week of signing?
She clearly did not enter into the contract in good faith, but that is no reason to penalize him, it would be ruled valid and binding.
By the way, anyone who thinks the contract would be laughed out of court is wrong.
How so? The original act of infidelity was forgiven and thus could not be used as grounds for a divorce.
But! The important thing to remember was that the post-nuptial contract would have had the effect of re-setting the clock and any subsequent acts of infidelity would be grounds for divorce.
But notice that this asshole reads everyone of them. Yep, he even goes looking for them. I gave this a 5 because it's a great LW story. annony rad it because he the fag the cum drinker and that's why his wife left his sorry ass , she had no respect for him at all!! If you like LW cheaters and fucking and sucking you'll love this one!!!
Fucking cum guzzling , pussy boy protagonist.is every ( man?) In the u k a dick sucker
Chris. You are under oath. Did you know your wife was cheating BEFORE you had her sign this document? Chris - Yes your honor. Judge - I order a 50/50 split of all assets. We're done. You really think a cheesy thing like that holds up in ANY Court? I'm still laughing at how bad this was and how ludicrous the husbands actions were. I wouldn't want to stay married to the oaf if I was in her shoes. What a doofus. And now he's a doofus with 50% less assets. Too funny for words.
Why are so many readers mad? He did what he had to do!!! And with no violence!!! For him was enough to know how stupid his cheating wife was to make her have only ten grand...I think he was too good to her...4*
still five stars. But why would she want to remain with him if she was still seeing her lover?
It also writes its own anon praise and deletes negative. But then, you'd expect this shit from a Brit ! They all like this !
Just 1* !!
for a human She loved dogs so she married this ass wipe annony. But his attitude made her cold at night and day and so she left for a real person. But she shit down his throat before she left. Gave the story a 5 just to piss of this asshole annoy!
You can't write dialogue, you're a rage - filled lunatic, and you've never kissed a girl. Get help.
At least read your stories once before posting them. Your characters go through 2-3 different names in almost all of your stories...
That is all.
But she just HAD to shit all over him - and got what she deserved - Hmm I say that a lot about this writers stories -
Chris sees the unsettling signs early ( the flowers, rapport between Karen and Roland at dance ) sees his marriage is on shakey ground and immediately starts to act . He isn't deterred or deferred from denials and makes his concerns known politely as possible, but firmly to both parties. Chris also readies the technology and recruits allies at Karen's work while allaying concerns of workplace mayhem.
One undertone that I get from story is that Chris is a master of my domain kind of guy and Karen was tired of coming up short due lack of intellectual heft in their differences. The affair was at least partially motivated by her desire to put one over on him. Chris did multiple end runs to subvert her subversion , but that obviously failed. However , even in defeat he salvaged things on a material level.
Great read with small but spicy nuggets of humor sprinkled from start to somewhat alleviating downhearted finish - the previous two commentators are either nimrods or Pulitzer prize winners in fiction. I suspect the former .
Fucking cunt. Fucking stupid cunt. The title is wrong. It should be "I Gained Control of the Marriage, and Ended The Debacle."
HA
Well done. The characters were well developed, the action (plot) moved briskly, the husband's emotions and thought processes were well described (story), the use of technology was sound and a big part of the plot, the settings were clear but more detail could have been included, the contract poorly written in long hand was a nice trick, and the ending monetarily for the husband was good but was he as cold blooded as you described him? Sorry about the long sentence ending with a question mark. I enjoyed the plot and the story.
Basically, the moment that she felt lust for this guy she should have realized that her marriage was over. The simplest thing would usually be to get a divorce and a nice 50:50 split but she wanted it all... It sounded to me as if the husband actually showed her where she could find a lover and that at the barbecue place they planned their future encounters. Though she did not sound like a first timer in the motel. Oh well, he is free without problems.
never entered her mind, TK U MLJ LV NV
And now we know why cantbuyabrain can't get a red H in Loving Wives, his disability is so profound he thinks that is a worthwhile comment, what a sad and pathetic dimwit.
I Lost Control of the Marriage: But, took control of the divorce.
Great revenge story.
The wife must have had a room temp IQ. Other than that well done.
From the very beginning he comes across as a domineering, controlling asshole. If he's been this overbearing and insufferable for their entire marriage, I totally understand why she ran to Roland. Ugh.
...but he definately wasn´t one. Anonymous is a fool. Fine story, nicely told and I enjoyed the read. 4*. Thanks for this story.
Because of the Anonymous white trash slimeball's comment. He burned the bitch. No wimp. You're a stupid cunt, obviously too illiterate to read. No wonder you're such a loser,
Sure was an expense bout of sex for the lady here. Good story.
Clever Chris, Krazy Karen. I really did think that Karen was misguided and wiuld get a wake up call. Too bad for her.
Given the insane amount of hypocrisy on the part of the husband, I'm surprised you didn't have him rationalizing cheating of his own. "You been lying and sneaking around!" I guess trolling Literotica's Loving WIves sections for ways to fuck over his wife is his sexless alternative.
Because apparently secretly having your wife tracked and then lying about it isn't the same thing as lying and sneaking, and spending time in Loving Wives where all wives are pretty much filthy whores isn't disrespectful. It's obvious to see why the dumb slut ditched him, as the other commenter noted regarding the cold bastard, but that's an expensive way to do it. Whore gets her just deserts, but given this dude's attitude, he's going to die lonely.
Agree on Hound Dog by BM Thornton...and it makes sense as opposed to the EP version! Also agree that Hubby's contact with Sweetie Mom was under-reported!
she thought he was stupid and found out that was not the case. consequences
5 *s. BTW, Big Mama Thorton's 1952 recording of Hound Dog was the first and the definitive version. Check it out - you won't return to the later versions.
In a loveless marriage. Sad story really. Factually, none of his evidence would have stood up in court. But, hey, she cheated and got her just desserts. Just a story anyway.
It was predicable, but the hubby said exactly what he needed to say, and then followed through when the wifey didn't heed the warnings. You can not "trap" a person in a marriage, and force them to behave; but you can tell them of the consequences of their actions, and then follow through. Thank You.