In The Grace of Liars

"Yeah, it's probably plugged in to my laptop."

"You're out of town, right?" she asked.

"What the fuck Jenn, are you stalking me now? How would you even know that?"

"No, I'm not stalking you -- I've been by your apartment twice and you're not there. I figured you went to see your cousin. I tried my key but I guess you changed the locks already."

"Looks like that was a smart move on my part. Were you just going to walk in? Maybe give Brad another blowjob on my dining room table?"

"Chris, please! I just need my drive. You know how hard I've worked on this paper. I'm almost done and it has to be turned in soon. Like really soon." Her voice was cracking. I knew Jennifer. I knew how much she didn't want to be making this phone call. I knew how desperate she must be to call me and ask me for something after everything that happened.

"Jennifer, what makes you think that after all this, I'm just going to hop in my car and run back to town to help you with anything?" I asked. I knew what she was doing. And I knew she would be successful. But I wasn't going to make it easy for her.

A long, uncomfortable moment of silence preceded her response. "Because you're a better person than I am Chris. Because I need your help right now and you've always been there for me." Now she was crying out-right. Maybe she did know how to play me. Maybe it was all fake and she was just saying the things she knew I needed to hear to get what she wanted. But I made her say it. And maybe -- just maybe, having to say it out loud would make her realize just how badly she screwed up.

"I'll call you when I get in town. You can meet me at my apartment and I'll give you the drive. There's some shampoo in the bathroom that's yours too. Be thinking of anything else that you've left because I'm not doing this again."

"Thank you, Chris."

"Whatever. This is the last favor I'm doing for you. Ever."

I tapped the red square on the phone display and tossed it back onto the coffee table where it almost knocked over a fresh cup of coffee. I didn't remember that being there. I looked up just as Andi sat down next to me, her own cup in hand.

"So I guess we're going on a road trip?" she asked, somewhat solemnly.

"No. I'm going on a road trip. You're going to stay here and start packing your shit." I said, more gruffly than I had intended. She looked a bit hurt and I realized my mistake. She wasn't the enemy. She was my best friend.

"I'm sorry Andi. I didn't mean to snap at you. That's not exactly how I was hoping to start my day today."

"It's OK. I wouldn't be in a very good mood after a conversation like that either," she said.

I winced as I sat back on the couch with my coffee in-hand, suddenly aware of how sore my back was. Damn it. She had been right -- my back and neck were killing me and I hadn't had enough to drink to blame a hang-over.

"Toldja," she said.

"Shut it, you."

That made her giggle, which made me smile. Her laugh was contagious; it lightened the mood a bit.

"Chris, I don't really have that much to pack. I don't have much stuff. It's just me here, you know? Let me come with you. You need me."

"I need you, huh?" I asked.

"Of course you do. For moral support if nothing else. It's eight hours on the road and I don't think you can be trusted to be alone with your thoughts for that long. That girl is bad news and I intend to keep you on the straight and narrow."

"My benefactor?" I asked, openly amused at the sudden juxtaposition.

"Your guardian angel!" she responded. "It's about time I start returning some favors anyway. You've been bailing me out of tough spots for years."

"OK. You can come. But breakfast first."

###

Several hours later we pulled up in the parking lot of my apartment. I hadn't called Jennifer yet. I wanted to make sure I found her jump drive before bothering to get her over here. There was still a small chance that it wasn't there and I didn't want to see her if I didn't have to. We walked up the stairs to my door and went in.

"Yep, this is your place, alright." Andi said as she surveyed my living space.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"Would it kill you to hang a picture or something?"

Andi wasn't the first person to comment on the bare walls. I wasn't much for decoration, preferring function over form. I didn't feel like my place was particularly unwelcoming or uncomfortable but I regularly got comments on it which was perhaps why I didn't do much entertaining.

"It works for me. Don't knock it," I said. "Besides, I've got pictures on the shelf. Over there." I pointed to a book shelf that stood in the corner of the living room. Andi walked over to it and started looking at the few framed photos I had that was pretty much the extent of my décor. Meanwhile I started scouring the place for the second time now looking for any signs of Jennifer.

I found her jump drive and tossed it in the center of the table that dominated my tiny dining area. I added to that a pink shampoo bottle and her spare razor that she kept in my bathroom along with a few other things that I ran across. I sent her a text to let her know that she should come by and get her things.

"I can't believe you still have this," Andi said as she picked up on of my framed pictures. She handed it to me. "I remember that day," she said.

It was a picture my mother had taken at the camp when Andi and I were teenagers. We were in the lake, in the canoe about to head out on an 'expedition'. That's what my mother called it when we would take off in the canoe. We would be gone for hours, exploring the lake and getting away from the grown-ups for as long as we could.

"That was the whiskey trip," she said.

I smiled, remembering the day she was referring to. "Was it?" I asked. I'd never put the photo together with that memory.

"Yep. See the green backpack in the canoe?" she asked.

Sure enough. We always carried a few things in a backpack -- snacks, towels and the like, but the bottle of whiskey wouldn't fit so we needed an extra bag. Andi emptied out her green backpack that she kept her clothes in and re-purposed it for booze smuggling. It was so clandestine and dangerous; we were like spies on a top-secret mission. We were both about ready to jump out of our skins when Mom called to us to smile for a picture.

"No shit. I never realized."

"Our parents were so pissed when we got back!" she laughed.

She was right. We were really drunk by the time we managed to paddle back to the camp, long after dark. Mom and Aunt Janice smelled the booze on us and we were both grounded for a month after that. Shortly after that they started keeping a lock on the liquor cabinet. From that point on any drinking that Andi and I did together had to be much more discrete.

"Yeah. I remember."

"Did you ever figure out how to pick the lock on that liquor cabinet?" she asked.

"Nah. I almost had it though. A little more time was all I needed. Mom died the next summer and I never got another crack at it."

I handed the picture back to Andi.

"Can we bring this back with us?" she asked, hugging the frame to her chest.

"Yeah, sure. It's all going to get moved eventually. Or put in storage. There's plenty of room in the unit where all of Mom and Dads stuff is."

"I'd forgotten about that. You still haven't gone through it?"

"Nah. Jesse told me years ago that the trust would pay for the storage unit as long as I wanted to keep it. I've only been the one time when everything was moved in, but I remember there being plenty of room left over. I've been meaning to get over there and clear it out."

"Well, why haven't you?" she asked.

"Just busy with things. I never seem to have a free weekend."

The truth of the matter was that I didn't want to. My parents whole lives were stored in that storage unit. Furniture, clothes, papers, and God knows what else. It would feel like I was letting them go to get rid of anything. What had meant something to them? What was just stuff? I didn't know how to tell the difference and couldn't bear the thought of letting something go that was important to one of them. I felt like I would be disappointing them.

Just then, Andi threw her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. "I've missed you so much, Chris. I'm glad we're going to be able to spend time together again." I hugged her back, feeling her body pressed against me. Her hair was soft against my face and smelled good and her body was warm under her shirt. I felt myself, again, reacting to her closeness. My pants started feeling tight as my cock started to stiffen. I broke the embrace for fear of embarrassing myself.

It wasn't much longer before Jennifer arrived. I answered the door and let her in, directing her to the small pile of things on the dining room table.

"There's the rest of your stuff. Your jump drive is there too."

She eyed the items on the table, then looked over at Andi. "Did you really need to bring back-up?" she asked.

"Just get your stuff. I have somewhere to be." I lied.

"I was hoping we could talk?" she said, looking at me with those puppy dog eyes that used to work so well.

I looked over at Andi. She sat on the couch with that picture in her hand. That picture of her and I together, smiling, about to go on an adventure. Now I understood why she came. I couldn't leave her here and run off with Jennifer and have a 'talk'. She knew I couldn't do that to her. That's why she wanted to come. To make sure I didn't do something stupid like take Jennifer back, or... something else. In that moment, just then, she was indeed my guardian angel.

"I don't think that's a good idea. You need to go."

"Chris, please," she pleaded, tears pooling in her eyes. "I'm sorry. Can we please just talk about it?"

Now she was getting to me. This girl that I'd spent the previous three years with. This girl that tied me in knots when we first met. But I thought again of Andi. I thought about the past two days that we'd spent together. Her smile. Her laugh. That look on her face as she sang along to the radio in the Jeep with her hair whipping around her beautiful face. She was here for me no matter what. She was my rock. And I wasn't going to let her down by caving in and taking Jennifer back.

"Talk about what, Jenn? Talk about what I saw at your house the other day?"

She flinched.

"Talk about how long you've been fucking Brad?" I asked.

"Talk about how sorry you are and how bad you fucked up?"

Tears were streaming down her face now. Slowly she nodded her head. "Yes," she said. "Yes, I fucked up. And yes, I'm sorry."

"Jennifer, lets say for the sake of argument that I went along with this and took you back." Andi's eyes went wide. "How long do you think it would be before I could look at you without thinking about the other day? You sat there and acted like I had no business being at your house."

She was quietly sobbing now. Andi had regained a bit of her composure though, having figured out where I was going with this.

"While you were by the pool with your bare ass in the air, giving head to someone who was supposed to be my friend, I was at the mall trying to find a gift for you that might help patch things up between us. I was thinking about you. About us."

"I'm so sorry..." she sobbed.

"I'm sorry too. I've given you three years of my life Jennifer, and in return I get lies and betrayal. So no. We can't talk. No, we can't get back together. And while I'm sure I'll forgive you one day, it's going to be a long time before I can see your face without thinking about your lips around another guys cock. So unless there was something else you wanted to say, I'll ask you one more time to please leave."

Without another word she stepped to the table and gathered up her things and made a quick exit, the door slamming shut behind her.

My knees were weak and my heart was racing. I found the couch and sat, just inches away from Andi. And then the tears came. I cried. I had loved that girl. So much of my life the past three years was just gone. It didn't matter for anything now. It was wasted time. Wasted effort. And perhaps most painfully, I realized that it was wasted love.

Then Andi was there. Holding me. Comforting me. Wiping my tears away and telling me that it was going to be OK. She told me that I did the right thing. She told me that it would feel better in time. She told me that there was another woman out there somewhere that would treat me right. She said that Jennifer was a fool to do the things that she did to me. She said all the things a friend is supposed to say. She was my friend, my cousin, my rock. I rested my head in her lap and just let go.

It took me some time to regain my composure. Mostly I lay with my head in her lap, crying some, sleeping some, thinking a lot. We would have to get moving if we were going to get back to her place at a reasonable hour. It wasn't my intention to stay as long as we did and it was getting on into the second half of the day. I gathered up a few things that I thought might prove useful, not the least of which was another bottle of whiskey and shoved them into a bag.

###

Back at Andi's place, I poured myself a whiskey as she disappeared into her bedroom to change. When she emerged, she wasn't wearing the t-shirt and panties that I was expecting (and if I'm being honest -- hoping for). I sat at the table, sipping my whiskey and rolling my shoulders, trying to work out the kinks that had taken up residence in my back muscles. It was little wonder I was sore after having spent eight hours in my Jeep and the entire previous night on a couch that must have had bricks woven into its cushions.

"Want me to help with that?" Andi asked as she pulled up a chair and poured herself a glass.

"Whatcha got in mind?"

"Come over here. Spin your chair around -- sit in it backwards with your back to me."

I complied, resting my chin on the back of the chair. I felt Andi's hands on my shoulders as she began kneading them. It wasn't long before she said, "Take your shirt off , I can't feel where my hands are."

Again I complied and lifted my shirt over my head. The cool air in her apartment made her hands feel very warm. She pushed her warm palms into my back and raised goosebumps all over my body. I melted in her hands as she rubbed the knots out of my muscles.

"You're not sleeping on the sofa again. It's fine if you're not comfortable sleeping in bed with me. I get it, you know? I'm your cousin and being close like that... well I guess I can see how it might weird you out a little bit. We're not kids anymore. I'll sleep on the sofa tonight."

"No, Andi, I-"

"Not a word about it, Chris. After the day you've had you need a good nights sleep."

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of her hands on me. Her fingers gently but firmly worked my sore muscles. She touched every one of them from my shoulders down to my lower back, pushing and pulling my torso this way and that, in a steady, hypnotic rhythm. It was a small piece of heaven that she gave me. A level of relaxation that I hadn't felt in ages.

"This is really nice. I haven't been this relaxed in a long time," I said.

"It's the least I can do," she replied.

"What do you mean, the least you can do? You've been taking care of me all day."

"You've been taking care of me our whole lives," she said quietly.

"No I haven't."

"Please don't make me sit here and go down the list of times that you've been here to bail me out of some bullshit or another. It's a long list and I'm getting tired. Need I remind you of my own personal little housing crisis that's just recently come up and how you swooped in and saved the day?"

She was still rubbing my back. "It's really not as big a deal as all that. If you think about it, what we're doing is really the only solution."

"Yeah, but it's got you moving all the way out here for two years. That's a long time for you to be stuck with me."

"Huh!" I snorted. "I'd rather be stuck with you for two years than stuck with her for another day. Believe me, I'm getting as much out of this arrangement as you are. Look, don't make a deal out of it, OK? I'm glad that I can help you out."

"Well, thanks."

"Nothing to it."

She stopped rubbing my back and leaned herself against me, wrapping her arms around me as she did it. I could feel her breasts against my back and her cheek resting between my shoulder blades.

"I'm always going to be here for you, Chris."

"I know Andi. I'll always be here for you too."

"You ready for bed?" she asked.

"Yeah, I think so. You?"

"Yeah. Just let me grab my pillow and a blanket out of the bedroom." She got up and headed for the bedroom.

I felt bad about kicking her out of her bed. I knew she wouldn't take no for an answer this time but I didn't want her to have to sleep on the sofa.

"Andi," I said, following her into the bedroom, "you don't have to sleep on the sofa. We can share the bed. I'm sorry for being weird about it."

"You're sure?" she asked.

"Yeah, yeah. It's fine, just let me change."

I went into the bathroom and put on a pair of athletic shorts that I brought from my apartment. I was getting tired of sleeping in my jeans, regardless of whether it was on the sofa or anywhere else. When I got to the bed, Andi was already under the covers. I slipped in beside her and was wrapped in softness. I smelled Andi everywhere. In the sheets and on the pillows there was a sweet, delicate smell that was her shampoo, her perfume, her body. It was intoxicating. Contented and comfortable, I sighed.

"More comfortable, huh?" she asked.

"Oh yeah." I said.

"G'night, Chris."

"G'night, Andi."

###

Andi slept in her night clothes that she had put on just before she sat down to rub my back. I again silently lamented her change of attire from the previous nights but thought it was surely for the best considering that we were now in bed together. Although I slept much better than the previous two nights put together, I still found myself awakened a couple of times during the night; both of which I remember quite clearly. I don't know if I was just hyper-aware of her because she was my cousin, or if I really just wanted her so badly that I was picking up on everything that was happening but any little movement from her woke me up.

The first time seemed innocent enough. A sleepy mistake, I thought. I woke up to the feeling of Andi's arm on my chest. At some point during the night she must have turned towards me and put her arm over me. I didn't think anything of it and drifted back to sleep; more comfortable now that she was closer to me than before when she was all the way across the bed.

The second time was slightly more interesting. Again, I thought for sure she was just moving innocently in her sleep. I felt her stirring next to me but when I came to I felt her body pressed against me and her leg draped over mine. She was all but laying on me, her soft, smooth leg resting on top of mine. Her arm was still draped across my chest, but now her shoulder rested on my chest, her breast pushed against me. My arm was trapped beneath her and I realized that my hand must be just about level with her pussy.

My cock stirred at that thought, which I quickly put out of my head. I had enough to worry about without embarrassing Andi with a hard-on when she woke up. It was for naught though, as when morning finally did come we were in another position all together. This one I didn't remember. Perhaps my brain was finally letting my body rest.

When I woke, Andi and I were spooning. I had my arm wrapped around her at her waist, pulling her close to me as her ass pushed against my morning wood. I panicked. Was she awake? Did she feel it? Dare I move away from her or would that just wake her up? A million excuses flew through my head in those terrifying few seconds after I woke up.