All Comments on 'It Begins...'

Your storytelling is excellent; content, pacing, etc. You really need to find some help with the mechanics, however. Spelling, grammar, and punctuation might not seem so important in a fine erotic story, but if readers have to step back into their own heads to figure something out, the story suffers. I hope to see more from you, because you're good, and you're writing in one of my favorite categories. Think about an editor.

Loved it. Hot and sexy. Well done!

Wow! Very hot! Nicely done

Really enjoyable.

Certainly got my attention....

Could do without the choking. Why risk turning la petit morte into the real thing?

I am amazed at the detail of this incounter and the mental image it induced!