All Comments on 'Jeremy Green Ch. 03'

I was thinking that you passed up Jacob's punishment of Jeremy but when I read ch 2 again I realized it's the same day.

As usual, I love it. One comment, though. I noticed some awkward grammar here and there and wondered what was up. Don't get me wrong, I love your writing and your plot more than makes up for it.

@Vampwriter........I didn't proofread the story. Guess that's why the grammar issues crept in. :P

@Anonymous...yep.it's the same day....Jeremy's punishment is due. And its Bad! :(

I love both of ur stories ,but i like this one more,i practically check literotica every day to see if u wrote ch 04 yet or not..pls hurry up i wanna know what will happen next and i think iam not the only one

where is the rest of this story.?

i think every time i check this story i leave a comment that said WHERE IS CH 4 ,please hurry up i really want to know whaty will happen next it is now my top favourite story ,really wish the next one will be sooooooooooooon

But, to me, it is very unrealistic.

First, I understand the relationship between Chris and Jeremy is supposed to be one where they stumble upon each other in a chance meeting and happen to develop feelings for each other, but the way they meet and the relationship between them isn't charming at all. I think it's because you didn't give the audience any reason why Chris definitely had to pursue Jeremy. I mean, Chris must bump into a lot of men, so why Jeremy? Even when Jeremy actively said no, he continued to pursue. You never explain this, so it just seems unrealistic to me that this man who is not being given the time of day continues to blindly pursue Jeremy. Also, Jeremy has no REAL reason to agree to go to dinner with Chris. He barely knows him and the attempt you made at his friends "forcing" him to go was a very lame excuse (at least in my opinion).

Second, you are not having Jeremy consider at all the danger of him having dinner and enjoying himself with Chris. Anyone in an abusive relationship would have been way too reluctant to even allow that man into their home, let alone have dinner with him. It's like Jeremy isn't concerned at all... that's unrealistic to me. These things were bothering me the first two chapters, and it wasn't too pervasive to me, but after this chapter the unrealism is just building and building.