All Comments on 'Just One of Those Nights'

You are off to a great start, your writing is solid, my only challenge to you would be to tell us about you subjects.

What are theier names, what do they look like, how did they come to be at this place, at this time, is this a role reversal for them, etc.

Thanks for writing, hope to see another chapter soon.

Thanks so much for reading and for the feedback :)

In this story, I was trying to make the couple seem like they could be any couple, if that makes sense? Hence me not naming them or really giving too much information. But I'm definitely going to work on giving more information on my subjects in future stories!

You have a very strong start if this is your first stab at erotica. I loved how the characters "knew" each other...unlike so many stories here where they are some stranger. It makes me think of my partner and I when you know what that look means without any words necessary. Keep up the writing. Looking forward to more.

C

Thanks for the feedback :) That's the exact feeling of lovers that I was trying to convey!

While I might be predictable it strikes me your story is an excellent start. Style aside I enjoyed the story which is my primary pre-requisite for anything like this. Having said that I like your writing style which is concise, clear and easy to follow and given your story is action-based makes it easy to follow. As somebody else has already said a little more colour/detail helps the reader get in the characters more. Anticipating what the reader might want to know is never easy. When youve worked out who I am I might send you some more detailed feedback.

nice short, i can really feel the desire of the narrator, of both of them. i like how they take turns teasing each other, and how they trade the initiative back and forth. you build the tension nicely, and the transition at the end from hot to tender was almost poetic.

Thanks so much for the comment, you basically encompassed what I was trying to convey!

I read this and the story about best friends and I just wanted to let you know that your writing is amazing and I look forward to reading more!

Thank you anon! :)

I've only just come across your stories and I think this is a very good first effort (certainly a five star first effort). I look forward to reading the others to see how you're progressing. Take heart, your grammar is not so bad as you seem to think. I've read far. far worse stories on this site by supposedly experienced writers which are said to have been edited. I've got one criticism, about a very small piece of careless writing. You have your narrator say: "My eyes darkened..." How does she know? The only time you see your own eyes is when you look in a mirror. It's just the sort of little thing a writer needs to be aware of.

I've read every one of your stories and I'm hooked. Please don't stop writing. You're amazing!