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All Comments on 'Kelly & Haley's Summer Ch. 01'
by Jairzinho
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- 4 Comments
Cyankeeabout 9 years agoEditing
Good story, but it really needs to be edited. Switching from 3rd person to 1st person is distracting. Several spelling errors also.
Anonymousover 11 years agoGreat plot, but writing needs work
For one thing, you CANNOT change from third person to first person halfway through a story.
Anonymousover 14 years agoPoor quality!
Wow, this is rough! The spelling was awful! What a waste of space.
Anonymousalmost 19 years agoNice, but...
It'd benefit from a good copy editor - why does it change from third to first person narration half way through, for example?
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