by StangStar06
5 stars for a well written orignal story and to help erase the 2 hypercritical JH4Fun deemed it to be worth.
I liked the story and all, but you get 5 stars from me anyway for the inclusion of The Corrs. Breathless takes me back to my college days. Thanks for the nostalgia.
Wow! TWO of your stories have now surprised me. Pure romance fiction as it is, nevertheless a good read. Thanx.
P.S. your line about the meek inheriting the earth just cracked me up! Thanx for that one, too.
What a great story, cheaters get their comeuppance and James and Helena and twins lived happily ever after. Well done 5/5
Yeah, this was a good one, my second or third time reading it. The narration by the daughter was great. Always love when the meek and mild father winds laying the smart ass out. The plane the daughter came up with for the settlement was great., nobody got to use the nuclear option which just benefits the lawyers. The of course the good guy gets the girl and rides off into the sunset. What's not to like about this story?
1 of the funniest most entertaining stories i have read in a long time. Thanks for ur hard work n time kno that it was enjoyed and appreciated
I don’t understand how some people can think up these things.
So we’ll put together and each character is different & the author needs to keep it a,ll straight in his mind while spinning a great yarn.This story eas so different in a good way & refreshing to read. I loved it.
Bill S.
Unique perspective. As always with this author an irredeemable cheating wife with no real remorse or depth not character. Just a stand-in for a series of events that destroy a marriage. But the daughter was very cool.
Another great story. I love the way that you name characters, Helena Troy and Kit Carson, brilliant.
5 Stars on a Great Story . I also hear that Kit is now working in Florida for Bill Maitland aka The Angel of Death .
=> That was awesome, actually well written female charters and thankfully (was resident to read it past the description as the incest stuff creeps me out and I have been caught on that a time or 2) all that said since I did enjoy your writing so well i would love to see the same story but written from the antagonists' perspective.
Kit was cool. Her mom was a cheating slut with no real remorse. The daughter's perspective was really engaging.
"Go through the rest of your life looking like a Picasso" made me laugh out loud.
Funny, engaging and poignant. Loved it. I enjoyed hearing from the daughter's perspective.
Lovely storey! Very enjoyable characters, with a really nice sense of humour.
Many thanks!
I mostly enjoyed the story, but there were several things I didn't like about it. Every woman in his life is dishonest and manipulative. Speaking of being manipulated, I can't recall a single decision in the story that he got to make for himself. I realize that you need to portray the daughter as the hero since it's written from her perspective, but you ended up making her more of an abusive than supportive character towards her father.
Great story. There are more Twins and navy seals in literotica land than I can count
OMG! I would NEVER want a woman like Kit, ESPECIALLY as a prosecuting attorney, on my "6". There is not a shred of mercy in that girl.
He divorce resolution plan was brilliant.
I'd suggest writing a few more stories with her as the centerpiece.
WELL DONE!
Great story. One thing that always gets though is how the woman is almost always pregnant when she get married.
Kit is brilliant but also a manipulator. She'll need to gain some serious insight and control on that or she may very well find that her husband divorces her.
con todos los navy seals que nos da literotica y sus historias, USA podría haber conquistado medio oriente hace años!
Who is Becky and I realize it is rhetorical now that he no longer writes, but did anyone on his team ever learn how to use quote marks?
Other than that…nice story. 5 stars.127685
OK, very nice story, bad guys get theirs even if its not a total wipe out, like the daughter and the rebound wife, very satisfactory story. Looked up the groop "the Corrs" that sing "breathless" and cant get it out of my mind(in a good way), they gots lotta good songs and are cute to watch in live concert videos. rk
Responses to past critiques; Bill SD wrote''''''So well put together and each character is different & the author needs to keep it all straight in his mind while spinning a great yarn.This story was so different in a good way & refreshing to read. Absolutely correct , kudos to author and Bill for recognizing good stuff.
--someone critiqued that MC didnt make any decisions for himself, that he was manipulated, true, BUT, none of their manipulations were bad for the MC, he was kinda stuck w/ getting fucked and how to deal, the manipulation did favor Helena and Kit, but so what? Both just wanted good for MC and if it helped them also, so be it. Will grant that manipulation can be selfish, as the x planned to manipulate daughter and hubby to protect herself and her lifestyle, while disrespecting(read fucking)both daughter and hubby.
---fully concur w/ the comment that""""I also hear that Kit is now working in Florida for Bill Maitland aka The Angel of Death""""
rk
I’m going through all the stories here & there are many I realize by the end of the first page that I’ve already read & move on. This one I rembered ½ way through the first page & rememberer I had read it twice before. It was good enough to read again so I did,
Still 5 stars.
Bill S.
5 Stars on a Great Story by Stang .. Stang is one of the top 5 writers here in My Opinion .
...how we miss the master. Let us revel in the numerous, well written stories SS06 provided over the years. Clear and simple plot, clear and consistent characters, good dialog, plenty of humor, and NO SEALS, no Mexican whorehouses, nor any major bloodshed. Not to mention great grammar, passable punctuation, and an easy clear read that requires no repeated rereading to discern what the hell the author meant...
While "Keep 'em comin'!" doesn't seem to fit, we can wish...
What a brilliantly written story with a great plot. I literally couldn't stop reading it.
That was one fun story, even as it was my second or third reading. The perspective from the the kids view of her cheating mother was great. Showing her advanced maturity with only a little bumbling was good to. The mother was despicable and an airhead. Was she a blond? 5 stars plus.
Did you hear about the blond that was flying somewhere? She's on this airliner and the Captaing comes on the PA system and says they er going to be little late landing because one of the engines failed, but not to worry we have three more still working. Awhile passes and he comes on again and says another engine has failed but they still have two but they will be delayed again. More time passes and he comes on again and says another engine has failed but they can fly on one ok, but we'll be delayed even more.
The blond turns to her companion and says: "If that last engine fails, we'll never land!"
I loved it, and gave it 5 stars. I especially liked how the daughter mentioned that principal Eddington's injuries were "small", when in reality he lost 6 inches. :-) Brilliant!!
"Mother, if you open your mouth, I'll slap the shit out of you, right here in this church." I clapped at this line then laughed at myself...Great ending great story!
Brilliant piece, until the cliché of getting his appendage bitten off, felt it was a truly rich story, until then. Solid 4* however.
I miss the good old days when I could look forward to new stories every week. The old ones are still worth a reread every now and then but . . .
Surprisingly well written, a good story arc and over all an enjoyable read. I'll be giving it 4 stars.
The only sticking point was the speed at which Hellena and the MC came together and the unnecessarily destructive and inexplicable nature of the Wife.
Well that and the straight out of the Christian conservative handbook of marriage and morality diatribes. Sadly the daughter was merely a cypher for said monologues, which did raise the question as to how a daughter could be so cold towards her mum ... what really was the history that led to such a poor relationship? We did get some insights, but that begged the question as to how she'd managed to remain married to this paragon of manhood for so long.
But perhaps most telling is that out of the cuck trifector only the Mustang was in evidence, it was interesting to note that he was neither a golfer nor a drinker of hard spirits, and neither had he been a member of the military, he didn't even own a Ford f-xxx truck ... so I do have my doubts as to whether he was a true cuck.
Perhaps he should have his daughter DNA tested, just to make sure. Otherwise I'd be wondering if the wife was suffering from a brain tumour, though shouldn't they have spotted that when doing scans and x-rays of her head after the accident?
A solid 6" out of 5! Loved it. Would have liked a few more pages but excellent story. Gonna read it again. Why? Because I seeing cheating wives get their comeuppance. ;)
2nd read, 5*s and heres why; great upstanding daughter standing by her dad, MC(hubby) trades up from a slut to an angel, looked up the song Breathless and really really like it and the group singing it, The Corrs. Slut get basically shit, stud is now unitless(+dickless), story has some great 1 liners, one of SS06's best. thanks and how did you hear of The Corrs? rk
I have had an unhappy string of three star stories with one four, over the last 24 hours. As for this one?
Five stars.
JPB
Just finished my third reading of this classic. I gave it 5+* for each reading, so let’s just round my total score up to 16*.
It helps to come ack to this story after a year. It was always a 5, but I can see that it is at least in the top 50 if not the top ten on this site. The author was truly a great story teller, and we will all miss the great stories he can no longer write.
The Hoary Cleric.
SO AWESOME! 5 stars. I especially enjoyed the bit about Dean's mom chewing her cud. Priceless.
The daughter is this weird unbelievable version of a Mary Sue. Somehow the wife gets hit by a Martian Slut Ray and turns into this characature of a LW shrew. I guess it's an interesting concept. But it didn't do anything for me
Melinda may be my favorite character in an LW story ever. I love how she was her dad's rock and also found him the perfect woman and more or less arranged it all. Her mother. Good lord what a waste of a person.
Great story! I loved Kit with her big heart and especially her snarky sense of humor. Any chance of a "further adventures of Kit"?
This was a very humorous story being told from the daughter's perspective of course. While of course it was also a tragedy but if you think about it, most comedies are tragedies because of what happens to the stories' characters. I have never been a fan of practical jokes or pranks because those things are always at the expense of someone's pride or embarrassment. Well written and from my view as an observer a very humorous story! 5 stars.
You surpassed yourself with this brilliant piece of writing. Everything clicked perfectly, especially Theresa’s jaw after getting it fixed. This goes o the “must read many times in the future” list since it makes me smile and just gives me a good feeling all over. Thank you got perking up my weekend, it needed it.
GG
Very nice story. I don't give 5's often however, this one was special.
All your stories are fantastic and this one's voice and style put it into a whole new category of excellence!
great story, love the daughter, loved Helena and looked and ended up loving the song "Breathless" as well as the group, "the corrs". mc is kind of a douche, dependable& steady, wife is despicable, if she hadnt cheated, the douche mc deserved to serve out a boring life sentence w/ her. rk
One of the best all around stories I have ever had the pleasure of reading. This is my fourth time through and it always puts a smile on my face and makes me feel better when I get depressed. It might not be a cure, but it sure as hell helps quite a bit. Thanks for writing and posting it. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️