All Comments on 'Loosing Cynthia Ch. 01'

Throw away the thesaurus and try telling a story instead of trying to impress with your vocabulary. You're using sentences such as "My head lolled about as I writhed in salacious fullness." in place of any real style. That's Bulwer-Lytton (e.g, Dark and Stormy Night) bad.

Enough already, are you writing a commentary or a story? No one will ever write a story that everyone likes, so there is no need to be touchy. Your stories are so unrealistic that you are bound to get a lot of negative feedback. Stay cool its only a story, unless it's true.

I liked your story, although you could lose the commentary at the beginning. That just invites negative feedback just for the hell of it. You should just thank people for feedback, give a little background if necessary, and leave the rest out. Longwinded sermons on how could people who don't like the storyline suggest violence is really unbecoming.

Dside, just curious have you ever posted positive feedback?