All Comments on 'Lost Girl: Julie's Story Ch. 02'

2 in 1 day . Wow . Thanks again BB . You have the sister brother thing down pretty good . Now on to the rest . Let's see the boys take the mom and aunt stories .

Lols their mom died a few days after the birth of their child. Lols lonely & no one cared. That's what that evil bitch get how do you blame a child for your mistake & cheating ways. Like Julie asked to be here. Like she told you to spread your legs for your husband's brother. I'm glad they got their happy ending it was made even sweeter knowing that bitch died.

You are a very talented writer! As always I truly enjoy your stories. I hope your writing extends past Literotica... You have a gift for words. I'd love to see a book by you on shelves someday. Your writing transports me to a time in my life that is sacred and dear to me. Your characters are so real and your descriptions are spot on. I am sad to see mark and Jules' story end. Personally I prefer their story over Nia and James' story. I can't wait to see what you have next! Thanks for the great read... Ended my day on a much better note than I started it with!

One of the top two or three writers on this site by far. You have a real talent. Thank you for sharing it with us. I read both parts back to bac k without putting it down for a second.

...Mark & Tink, arm in arm, visiting Mum in the sanatorium, with Mum recognizing them for a brief moment. She goes crazy (oh wait, she's already there), attempts to carry out her plan, begins shouting, only to be sedated and strapped in to her bed by the orderlies. Orderlies to one another: "she's really off the deep end today" Julie: "buh bye Mum" Mark, softly in her ear: "is something amiss, Mother?"

Off into the sunset, etc

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Beachbum, you have a gift. One that I, and others truly hope we'll have the chance to read a novel by you. Let us ALL know when it's published, along with the title!

Another masterpiece by my favorite author! You have a way of pulling me into your stories like no other. I actually shed a tear while parts 1 & 2 of this story. Thank you! Now I'm off to read Nia

I wanted to wait until I read Ch. 02 before I left a comment, and I must say, you, my friend, have become one of MY favorite authors. I look forward to reading more of your work in the near future, hence the reason I gave you 5 Stars on both tales

You are a True Master at writing. Please keep them coming. I have read 4 of your stories so far and every one has been a 5 star! Looking forward to more chapters on Rag Doll, Nia, and Lost & Found :D

you have done it again... you are a MASTER at these stories

Thank you , this is 5***** stars ! This was a great story , you've done it again !

Bravo ! Bravo !

Bravo

I just looked up those dates and the birth records for people dying with the smae name and for those dates theres only one match... in bristol coincidence? deffinatly 5 stars man the whole thing with tink and the lost boy worked perfectly

Sir (or even madam), while I appreciate that you liked and appreciated my story in return, let me just point out that your post has managed to do what tours in East Timor, Sri Lanka, Iraq, and five tours in Afghanistan never achieved, which is to scare the fucking daylights out of me; this site is for the publication of erotica, which is basically grounded in fantasy, and somehow I don't think explicit instructions on how to commit the perfect murder falls within the remit of the site. I'm removing your post because it is an implied incitement to commit a crime, and because you have truly frightened me. Please don't take offence, this is not personal, I just don't feel the oopportunity to comment on a particular story is carte-blanche to describe in chilling detail exactly how to kill a person undetectably - your phrase "yes, I know it is just a story and he can't benefit from my comment but perhaps others will" is extremely disturbing, not to say very scary, and I therefore have no option but to remove the entire comment. Please feel free to comment on other stories, just please kindly refrain from handing out further explicit instructions on how to bring about the death of another person.

one of the many great stories you wrote keep up the good work. : )

It is a sad commentary on the human condition that there can be people as evil as you describe their mother, yet there are. A most wonderful story.

I think it would be great if you were to revisit this story and reunite these two with their family as the aunt wished for in Big girls don't cry .like you grew the Ragdoll story. I don't know how you would do it as it is your story but it could be good.

it was sad that julie and mark had to suffer because she was the one that got pregnant by her brother in law

I loved this chapter, hell I loved the whole story. It pains to think that there are people as evil as the mother, but I know they are out there through first hand experience. I hope you unite Mark and Julie with the lost family from Big girls don't cry.

Well glad you had Mark redeem himself which made the story finally complete. You are one of the best writers on here now going to see the rest of your stories.

im not useally a sibling reader but im glad i read this one nicely laid out and thought out keep up the great writing

What can I say. Another best seller.

Like all your stories.

Quick question is the David in this part the same David from in love with lori.

The David in this story is not David Denham from the 'In Love With Lori' story arc, although maybe he should have been, when he was still single and a student in London, oh well, too late now. This story here, along with 'Nia', 'Big Girls Don't Cry', and, eventually, the 'Rag Doll' and 'Lost & Found' arcs will complete that world.

'In Love With Lori' is part of the 'Shining Girl' universe, and includes 'All I ever Wanted'.

There is a further 'Rag Doll' storyline in prep, 'Ricky's Story', how he met and fell for Yasmin, and 'Bloodlines', the connecting story that links 'Rag Doll' and 'Lost & Found' and ties-off all the loose ends I could find. I might be tempted to write the David here into the next 'Sisterfest' storyline, he's such an obvious candidate, now I think about it; jilted by Julie, he goes off to lick his wounds, and little sister's waiting for her chance, it almost writes itself, so thanks for the nudge!

Best,

Will

The action stuff with the thugs, turning to the cleaners, the flight from NY, all seemed a little like you didn't flesh out the outline enough.

Not saying it's bad, mind. Just sayin', you have done some pretty damn good stuff in your other stories without having sections start to ring into a hackneyed bit. It comes back out of that and back to your better qualities. Honest to goodness the plot works but there suddenly seems like a little bit of deux ex machina with the ability to call on the shadow side of the law so easily. Then it goes back to the solid.

Not asking what happened. Just hopeful that was a one time thing with your writing.

What are you talking about? Because your comment makes no sense unless you commented on the wrong story

you're a brilliant story-teller and writer. everytime i read one of your stories it becomes my new fav. this one is no different! (although Lori is always my all-time fav). i hope you're planning on adding more stories - new or add-ons - doesn't matter - because i'm running out of stories of yours to read!!!

A lot of your characters end up with their sibling and are obsessed with buts. Lol but so many characters interacting with each other that are in some form of relationship with their sibling kind of pushing the realm of possibility a bit that being said it was a great story and I enjoyed it.

Gotta say I'm loving the ‘story verse' you’ve created and how they all tie in. Would love to see them all ordered into a book series, like we say down south "so good makes ya wanna slap somebody" lol

The only thing i can see in this story is the nearly one page long sex scene with David. She was cheating in my eyes.

This was a beautiful story, BB. Thank you for writing it.

I gotta say, this story is decent. The word choices fit well with the subjects they depict. They all flow and fit well together. It is like the words Scent and Smell. I love the scent of a woman, VS Did you smell that woman? The word “Smell” adds a negative connotation to its particular sentencing and subject matter. Where as “Scent” adds a positive note. It feels more precise and is better suited for a more clean, and fresh meaning to the subject its describing.

Now, the irritating parts of the story. The MC, Mark is a flat-out, no defense, the character is a coward! Minus the bro and the sis thing, he swears to only ever love Julia for as long as he lives. He would do anything for her, and yadda yadda yadda.. He does not mean it because as soon as mom is in the works, looking to ruin her daughter and is such a psychotic, uber crazy, serial stalker. Plus all the other negative aspects she could bring into their world. The one that is the kicker is Mark does not love Julia enough to make damn certain the threat to his sister, the very dangerous threat to the life of the woman he claims to love, he has not the spine and strength of will, determination to see that threat is permanently removed from her life, or wiped from existence!