Lucid Ending

The tears were becoming even harder to hold back. Her eyes were bursting to the seams with liquid emotion. A few strays just about sneaked past her defences. She had promised that she would always be there for him and yet she had let him suffer so much, for so long.

She paused, using every ounce of her will-power to hold back the deluge of moisture brimming in her eyes. He sensed it somehow and whispered in her ear.

"It's okay. Let it out."

Scarcely had he uttered these words, than her carefully constructed defence shattered. The floodgates opened, causing an explosion of brine from her eyes. It gushed down her cheeks, each sob reverberating around the room.

Adrian was bathed in her tears, softly dripping off her chin and hitting his face. Her teary cheek pressed against his face.

"Don't hold anything back. There is no shame in crying."

After most of her tears were shed, she crawled into bed with him, holding her head close. The next stanza was for him and for him only. Drawing her lips to his ear, she whispered softly.

"I'll take your part
When darkness comes
And pain is all around
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down."

Surprisingly, the darkness and the pain had melded seamlessly in his mind. He was at peace with his impending fate. Not because it would be soon. Not because it would be painless.

He was at peace because he would die loved more than any man alive.

Karen just could not bring herself to finish the song. She tried, but the lyrics were drowned in her copious sobbing.

"Thank you for a last memory. Thank you for everything."

They held each other tightly once more. One last time.

"Is it time?" he asked, in a whisper.

"Yes it is. It's time to sleep now."

He mustered enough strength to point towards his right.

"See that thing there? It's keeping air pumping in and out of my body. My lungs are essentially dead, so that is what is keeping me alive."

She looked to see a blue machine with a pump, mechanically pumping clean air into his blood stream. The channel was inserted into his dying lungs and oxygenated his blood artificially.

She nodded, understanding what she had to do. Gently stroking his scalp, she spoke into his ear.

"Your mother misses you, Adrian. Don't you want to see her?"

He did not say anything, only smiled at her. A few people had gathered in front of the door. Some had their camera phones out, taking a snippet for themselves. The press waited down the corridor with bated breath.

He asked her, with some trepidation, "Are you going to be all right?"

The silence spoke for itself. He understood that she would cry an ocean for a long time.

"Cry only because you love me. Not because you lost me, because you can never lose me."

Planting a small kiss on his lips, Karen rose from the bed, purpose exuding from every pore. She grabbed a spare crutch in the room and slowly walked back to the door. Defiance blazed from her eyes as she wedged the crutch between the handle and the frame on the opposite side, effectively locking the door. The onlookers were paralysed with shock as she walked back to her love and clutched his hand one last time.

"Don't you dare let go."

She pulled out the oxygen channel from his body.

Sirens wailed and emergency lights strobed round and round. The plot on the EKG graph went went haywire. Nurses and doctors rushed to the room, aghast at the scene before them. Two burly orderlies tried forcing the door open, to no avail. They pulled and struggled with all their might, the sliding door sullenly refusing to budge.

They banged against the door, trying to convince Karen to open it. She blocked out the mayhem around her and focused on Adrian. His breaths became weaker with each passing second as his body thrashed on the throes of death.

One of her hands held his tightly, while the other rested on his forehead, caressing it.

"Look, Karen. I can see my Mom. She looks so happy to see me," he said, barely audible.

The press heard the commotion and rushed to the ward. Big cameras strafed for position, aiming the lenses through the thick glass at the drama unfolding. Shutterbugs went wild, clicking vociferously while reporters hastily got ready to report the story of their lives.

Suddenly, the eyeballs of the world were fixed on the epic tragedy in the intensive care ward of Clinton Memorial.

Each breath Adrian took was weaker than the last, the effort of breathing proving too much for his lungs. His lips gradually widened to a smile as his pulse approached zero.

He had just about enough air left in him to say, "I love you, Karen."

"I love you too. Go in peace."

The next breath of air went in, but did not come out. It was over.

There was a clattering sound as the crutch holding the door finally fell. Doctors rushed in and gaped open-mouthed. The monitor showed a flat line.

Karen lifted the dead weight of her love off the bed and held him to her heart fiercely. A part of her had died. Something she could not quantify or describe in words. Something physical, yet abstract. Something that had left a gaping wound in her. Holding him tightly in her arms, she faced the small army of doctors, nurses and press staring at her.

"Monsters!"

The word took them aback.

"Monsters. All of you. Monsters. He was in so much pain and none of you saw it. No one."

Each word was slow and measured. Her voice was shaking with fury.

"All of you deserve to rot in hell for what you put him through."

The voice seemed somehow disembodied, as if it came from a part of her that she was not aware of. She would never again be the same person.

Placing him back on the pillow, she took a moment to admire his face. A peaceful pallor had spread over it. He was smiling, an eternal sign of happiness carved into his face.

Karen delicately put the blanket up to his neck and tucked him in. Adrian had finally gone to sleep and was once more at peace with the world. Placing a final kiss on his forehead, she got up, just as the police entered the ward.

"Ma'am, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you...."

The officer was cut off by a wave of her hand. She placed a finger to her lips, silencing him out of bewilderment.

"Can we take this outside, officer? Adrian has just gone to sleep."

For true love and the blessed few who have known it in their lives. Every moment spent with their loved one is an eternity in itself.

And for those who have known loss. No one can feel what you go through every day when you see the empty pillow, the vacant chair at breakfast and the abject loneliness that medicine cannot heal. Know that they are still with you, giving you courage to face every day.

If you love someone, and have not shown them how much lately, do it now. Show them how much they mean to you. Otherwise when you part, the weight of all that you did not do will come crashing down all around you, burying you in a tomb of regret and lost opportunity.

"Our moments together sustain me,

All night till the day is dawning.

Your memory gives me strength

To get up and face the morning.

I must go now, love.

Face the new day and my sorrows.

But for one more yesterday with you,

I would give up all my tomorrows."