All Comments on 'Mom, Were You Once a Porn Star?'

Just the type of story I really like. Sex between mother and son never gets old. Thanks for the good story....Rich

The subject of a mother with a dark background in the sex industries is very interesting towards the reaction of the son. But it missed the chance for a higher tense with the easy approval of the son. Also their way to intercourse was very plain and simple without any tease or seduction or other reason why that happend now and not before. Without any fear of the mother for loosing the love and respect of her son or the son's trouble finding a sensible way to ask for her sinful past and it's sexual acts due to curiosity and hidden accusation, the interaction between both seem cold and distant as if the weren't mother and son living several years together. That shows also in your language where you missed to use pronouns to draw a conntection between the persons. "She settled on the sofa and [her] son suckled her with his head resting on [his] mother's lap". I wondered why you didn't give them numbers. So without any scandal (besides her former business the son didn't feel bothered he was just a work accident) she could have been a circus artist as well. This way this story was a unreflected report about acting in porn movies without a expected explanation or justification and a sudden sexual engagement that lacked of athmosphere because of linguistic disability and sufficient justification. I know you described a nice relationship in the end that shows there is a interesting potential, so I would suggest you ask for an revisor/editor for help to make your stories function the way you want to express yourself.

It seems you had an idea for a story that really grabbed your attention, but even the most enthusiastic writer needs some skill. It read like a real porno: "Hi. I'm the pizza delivery guy." "Hi, pizza delivery guy. Oh, yeah, by the way--I'm horny." "Oh. I'm horny too." "Great. Want to have some sex?" "Sure. Sex wooud be great." "Okay." ...and so on.

The dialog was strained, and erratic as all hell. One minute the guy can't speak, and the next minute, he's 'waxing eloquent'.

If you plan on continuing to write, here's a serious suggestion: Get a proof reader to go through the story before you post it for the public to read. In fact, have a couple of different people read it first. Take any constructive criticism you get, make any neccessary changes, and see if it isn't better received.

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...that's right, another story written by a 14yo!

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Absolute garbage!!!

I loved reading this story. I think it is great, unlike some people who are always putting down other peoples work. Please keep on writing.

And it makes perfect sense. As a porn start mom spread her thighs for strangers. Now she'll be doing the same, with love and lust, for her own boy Neil. Mom's had so many penises up that hairy hole between her legs, she's overjoyed to welcome her own kid's fat young penis up the same vagina he came out of years before. It'll be a nonstop welcome home party for Neil up his own mother's cunt.

This is a very well written story as the dialogue is very different than most stories. I really enjoyed your writting style and the fact that Mother and Son did have wonderful sex but it was erotic and not trashy. Great quality and effective writing. I sure hope you write more as I certainly would appreciate that, thank you !!

Not me, the dialogue. The conversation between mother and son seemed overly formal and stilted. Especially on such a topic. It didn't feel like a real conversation. "I say, mother dearest, didst thou partake in the dark arts of the porno-graphy?" "Why yes beloved fruit of my lions, Mother did. Now wouldst thou care to make the beast with two backs with your female progenitor?" Stiff.