To my beloved son,
I can't believe what happen last night! I feel so guilty because of it but at the same time I feel like I need more. Last night we shared the kind of love and appreciation I haven't felt in so many years.
Oh, you've certainly grown! I can still remember when I was always out of breath trying to keep up with your youthful exploits. Now you make me out of breath in a way that only a man can. And that is what you are now, a man!
So many mothers say that their sons will always be boys to them, well I certainly know better. I can still remember when you were a baby and I would hold you in my arms while you suckled at my breasts. Then last night it was you who was holding me in your arms and with every flick of your tongue against me and with every pinch and rub of my nipples you sent quivers of excitement through me. Oh my have things changed.
You've grown up to be quite a wonderful man. I'm sure you've known how sad and lonely I've been since your father left me. Everyone purposely avoids looking at me but I know they stare when I'm not looking. They try and see if they can find why a good man like your father would leave me. They try and see what is wrong with me. Was I mean to him? Did I ignore him? Did I emasculate him? Was I unfaithful? Maybe I'm ugly under my clothes. Maybe I don't take care of myself in a way that pleased him.
You know better then them now don't you? You can see that it wasn't me. I did all I could to please him. I dressed the way he wanted, I kept my hair the way he wanted, I shaved the way he wanted, I walked and talked the way he wanted but it was never enough. He never wanted me. I was just an object, a servant that kept the house clean and the kids out of his hair. You probably knew that, even back then, and you certainly see it now.
You didn't grow up to be that way though. You noticed me last night. You complemented me on how neat I had kept me hair and how nice my dress showed off my figure. You didn't tell me to be quite when I spoke to you and you listened when I talked. You didn't make me drink alone, afraid to be caught doing something as horrible as enjoying a glass of wine. You encouraged me to drink if I wanted to and even drank with me. You shared stories with me and allowed me to share with you. You didn't push me away or make me work until I couldn't move anymore. You treated me with love.
And that's why I fell in love with you last night. It wasn't a physical thing, not like those shallow girls you dated in school, but an emotional love. I, as a woman, fell in love with you, as a man.
And that's why I begged you to come to bed with me last night. I wanted to feel you embrace. I wanted to feel you manhood fill me completely! I wanted to feel the warmth of your lips against mine. I wanted to feel you thrust into me as deep as possible before sliding out only to thrust back in again. I wanted you to whisper dirty little words into my ears. I wanted to feel you strong hands against my tender breasts as they rubbed me softly. I wanted to see your face as your manhood pulsed inside of me just before your seed flowed deep into my womb. I wanted to feel the glowing warmth inside of me as we both relaxed in each others arms.
I had dreamed about a night like last night since I was a little girl and last night you gave me that night.
After you left this morning I was so excited. I spent all morning going from store to store. I got a new outfit that I think you'll love and I spent two hours getting my hair done so that it would be perfect for you. I'm cooking your favorite meal and I bought us a brand new bottle of wine to share. I've got so much I want to tell you and I've even been talking with the kids next door so I can learn your slang. I want to make you as happy as you made me.
I can't wait to see you again tonight; you'll be so pleased with me.
Your loving and devoted mother.