All Comments on 'Mutual Incest'

Since this was your first post, I'll go easy on you. Stay "caught" in the thought and don't bother putting it out here for others tro read. At best, this was poorly written, seemingly written by a fifth grader. I'd tell you to get an editor, but that would be a moot point.

this sounded as stale as a medical report. where is the passion??

JUST CHECKED OUT YOU STORY NOT BAD FOR A FIRST. DONT LET THE ANONYMOUS ASS HOLES GET YOU DOWN. IF THEY HAD BALLS THEY WOULD LEAVE THEIR NAMES. AGAIN DONT LET THEM GET YOU DOWN. BEGIN BY WHRITING DOWN THE STORY AND THEN REWRITE UNTIL YOU THINK IT IS GOOD. THEN THINK OF WAYS TO IMPROVE THE STORY. HAVE A GOOD ONE AND KEEP TRYING,

It was a good first try but needs to be more descriptive in areas.

My best advice would be to slow the story down alittle. The sex just felt really rushed. I think if you do that the other issues will work themselves out.

So keep writing....the good far out weights the bad.

Him and his siblings were nothing like their parents

You need to just forget it!!!!

"JUST CHECKED OUT YOU STORY NOT BAD FOR A FIRST."

<P>

That was the sum of your comments on the story. The rest is about how people who think different from you are not allowed to state their opinions --- and THEY'RE the assholes. Ya got a fucked up definition of the word, moron.

Grammar errors were distracting. Factual errors also....an excuse about a Dr. Appointment on Thanksgiving??? Needed more thought, more plot, more polish. A 10-incher..why???

You have all the potential but you just rushed it, flesh out you characters more, eye color, general life, etc.

Please write chapter 2 but spend more time on it.

Your awful grammar makes the story very hard to read and enjoy. After the second paragraph I stopped.

Before you publish the story on this and any other sites, I'd suggest you give it to someone with good writing skills to edit and correct.

Dude get a grip. I had to stop reading two paragraphs down.

Then the grammar errors and the... oh, it needs work. Get an editor, make the changes and resubmit. The story has promise.

The story had all the makings of a good one, but as many have said: your grammar sucks, your storyline is full of stupid errors (the DR appointment on Thanksgiving) and, for many of us, the FRIED turkey - oh yes - the 10" dong. My advice: some are not cut out to write, some are - you're NOT. Quit while you're ahead!

Could have been more descriptive in the sex scenes,and given a beter account of what they did the next morning. Made it a little more erotic and explicit.

It's a shame she didn't move in with her brother so he could fuck her every day.

Thanks for the read.

And that was too much, could have been a good story I think, but I'll never know!

Just awful. No stars.

This was TERRIBLE! There was no passion, no love. You rushed it, and you could probably do much better.

I liked it, except that the boy should have fucked his sister up her cunt, not her asshole. It's up his sister's cunt that a boy's creamy sperm belongs.

She takes it in her ass with no lube mentioned or any difficulty, either. Preposterous! Otherwise a fair to good story.

Poorly written, no characterization whatsoever, ridiculously rushed and really just not particularly entertaining let alone engaging at least besides the ridiculously sill tropes littered throughout that almost make this seem like a joke, but really the entire story is surmised as, she blew him, and lo it was good, they had sex... Apparently and then went for anal because hey why not... Apparently and lo twas amazing as she has an ass made of pure elastic. Try actually writing next time.

Honestly, you started off great. Then, by the shower scene, I have no idea what happened. The characters fell flat, there was no more chemistry, and you seemed either hurried to get to the sex or you got concerned about the length. Either way, this story is a tepid 3 stars. Tou showed you have promise and I would like to see you try again. You have that kind of potential. In the future, don't give up the sizzle just to get the steak out of the way. Presentation and the wait are well worth it.