All Comments on 'New Girl Ch. 01'

I'm feeling that the plot of the story is somewhat at odds with the setting. As the lord of a pioneering effort like this new town, Royce would likely be quite ambitious and determined. Not to mention having to work tirelessly on the various problems that would inevitably arise. Thus, his choice of two capable women as his wives, Susan and Charlotte, were great and fitting choices.

In comparision, Mayet seems like a teen that he coddles and requires effort on his part to help along. It seems that a man in Royce's position with his responsibilities would have no time for educating the help, even if they had a certain exotic appeal. Moreover Mayet's (Kitten, a bit too cutesy IMHO) demonstrated lack of proficiency would be a turn-off on the frontier where strength is needed.

All in all, I'd be honestly far more interested in a story revolving around Royce's relationship with Susan and Charlotte. I don't have high hopes for this though since Mayet is practically the title character, which is pretty discouraging given how uncompelling she is as a character.

Actually I'm working on the stories of other women in Royce's life. Not having much luck finding a regular editor thus far, so it's slow going.

Yes, Royce is busy, which is why he delegated the task of education to Miri.

If I'm not mistaken, Mayet was a common name in ancient Egypt (Kemet). The people of Caloren are a mixture of humans from ancient times, primarily Kemetic, Hellenic (Greek), and Ba'lorian (non-Terran). The Empire of Cartharsis, to the south of the Caloren States also has similar mixtures, though very different minorities.

Miri, in the language of her people (Ba'lorian), means flower.

you are a very smooth writer. detailed and flowing. a top tier amongst writers.

not sure how far this story goes in 3 chapters, but off to the next.

The respect is sexy.