All Comments on 'Nightmares'

Thank you from a 70 year old vet.

Thank you for letting me see a little of what my father went threw.

As a Vietnam war veteran, let me say thank you.

As a Vietnam vet i carried those nightmares around for 33 years before I was able to get help - and my wife of 41 years was my rock also, but all she could do was sit beside me and hold my hand. I don't know what I would have done without her - thank God for ALL "loving wifes".

Thank you for your story - my husband was a Vietnam Vet - there were nights I didn't know if I would survive his horrible nightmares - tossing and thrashing around as he did. I was afraid he would wake up in a flashback and not know who I was. Thankfully that didn't happen -but the daily flashbacks, nightmares, and other symptoms of PTSD, plus the closetfull of meds he was on - well, people don't understand mental illness isn't something you can just 'fix.'

My husband passed away on March 22, 2010 - and in my mind is in a much better place now than the hell he lived in on earth every single day. And yes - the wives...they are a huge part of keeping the one that suffers alive. Statistically - more Vietnam Vets have committed suicide than were actually killed in the war. Over 70,000 compared to 58,000.

Many of us, who are over 70 and do not have anything super traumatical in our past also have problems with nightmares and unfortunate memories coming back during the day. Very few of us are trained to handle these and not all of us have a wife with whom we can talk..... Mine was always intolerant of signs of what she considered weaknesses even though she always was and is loving. But now that she has Alzheimer's there is no way to interact and there is a lot of extra trauma in the day to day. Perhaps there should be classes in this, that everyone takes..

Just a small thank you and a good read. i'm also a vet, 68 - 70, all over southeast asia, been there done that. it took almost 15 years to control my PTSD, Seattle Vet Center had a gread program, it just took me time. Again thank you, a great short read and to the point.

Thank you all for the comments. Nightmares was a hard story to write. I am glad that I may have done a small part in pputting forward more knowledge of the horrors of PTSD, something that can sometimes cripple a person far more effectively than a physical disability yet in many instances is either hidden or discounted as weakness. As Bruce22 points out, the trauma doesn't necessarily have to be a major event to be traumatic to the victim, and there can be a tremendous lack of meaningful assistance, depending on where the person lives.

...for all people, young and old. It is not just the horrors of war that cause us internal strife, it can be just the seemingly unsolvable problems of daily life.

I'm a WWII and Korean War vet, but the memories of those days have been tempered with time. Even the trauma I'm exposed to daily as an Emergency Medical Technician in our volunteer fire department's Rescue Squad is usually easy to get over in time. It's the dreams I have about daily life that are the most disturbing because, if I'm just smart enough, I can make a difference in my life and others' lives if I keep my head about me.

My wife had a stroke 11 years ago and can not speak nor do the common housework or cooking. That forces me to have to *think* for her when I'm making decisions, I have to imagine the input she would have given, if she only could. That is my nightmare. It is easy to do the things my way. Trying to remember what she might want and deciding how to do that is not easy to live with.

So, thank you, Northlander, for for making us pause and think about how we should handle those problems that have shaken us to the core.

To the vets in the comments below...My humblest reverence for your service. For the care givers below...my deepest admiration for sticking with your loved onces through thick and thin. For the platform provided by the author...my heartfelt thanks for a job well done.

Semper Fi

There are many who never understand why some people they see seem to be "absent" or fail to "pay attention" and look around them not at them etc.

Survival is an instinct most of us never tap into it - not truly and of those who do few live for prolonged periods tapped into it - so very few ever get a glimpse into what life can become. That is not say that the people who do go there can't make it back or function or whatever - but we all need to be just that little bit tolerant of everyone around us because we owe to so many who do so much everyday - not a large percentage of the population but still millions of people -

They have earned our respect, our tolerance and our gratitude. Most never ask for anything too many like the hero in the story should but we do not support that idea that they could need help very well, never mind actually provide the support they need.

Memory is a powerful and sometimes painful thng -

He was never in a warzone to my knowledge ( maybe the end of Borneo but I don't think so ) but his time as a copper turned him into an alcoholic who just ran away from everything. Great respect for a lot of coppers, and firemen & ambulance staff and any other volunteer service personel, had my own fight with PTSD ( still have ) and drug abuse ( kicked that ) - gonna agree that medicine is what helps you survive a day, not what overcomes the cause. Hugs are magic. Stay strong.

...and for sharing it.

67-68 Khe Sahn, Sempre Fi. The drugs and therapy don't help me much. I still have the nightmares, but thank God they are fewer now than over the past 50 years. My wife is my rock, but I'm slowly losing her to Alzheimer's. If only for her I keep struggling, I don't want someone else caring for my darling, I couldn't do that to her, or my family. Thank you for writing.

Conflicted. Expose and describe real problems that nebulous at conflict with internal perceptions/delusions versus external realities that can alter the internal dialogue or misinterpretation of the conscious mind and/or the subconscious replays of present and past experiences that color the mental context of what is happening. How to reconcile that and find peace or be haunted by traumatic life changing events is the crux of the issue on whether or not to move forward or abort existence. ("To be or not to Be"...)