All Comments on 'Not Yours'

Good start, I would definitely like to read more in this promising series. Hot scenes and good build-up. Thanks, 5 star.

This was a great start and I would love to see more from you. Can't wait to see what you write next. Thanks for a great read!!

When I first started reading this, I didn't know where it would lead, or if I would even like it. After reading it...I have to say the premise is very interesting, and look forward to the next installment. To be truthful though, the only criticisms I have are more detail in the love making needed, and also maybe drop the hatred angle. For some reason, it just turned me off a little...dont know why. Again, great start, look forward to reading more!

Use double quotes (") to enclose statements made by your characters and single quote (') for word contraction and possessions.

I can't wait to find out what his wife thinks when she finds out that they're together.

Great start, give us more.

No legalize terminology.....This story could prove to be interesting. TK U MLJ LV NV

Oh yes, this definitely rates a five. You've set up a really interesting scenario that you can take in several great directions. The sex is hot but not over the top. More please.

Yes I enjoyed the senario. I think an exploration where his ex wife becomes his mother in law (god imagine it) would be fun. Perhaps, his ex reralising what she has missed, jiopn in a 3some ............

Def. More

Good ending and not a bad story.

Watch your spelling and grammar though.

more pleeeez

And another vote for continuing this story. I think at least one more chapter is needed to tie things up nicely. They could get married, have a couple of kids, and then find out that he really is her father after all. How about that for a twist?

please write morew

I was very much enjoying this thoughtful and realistic yarn. However, when suddenly Leanna, who never had given a blow job, is instantly able to deep throat her father and went on to give a world class blow job. Suddenly, the story took a turn towards the ridiculous. When Dad said that a man makes better love to a woman based on her beauty, I was surprised. What a ridiculous notion.

looking for a story cinda like this when the daughter comes to visit his divorced dad for the summer she tells him that her mother have said that she isn't his daughter so she would have to stop seeing him, so she suggests they get married since he no longer officially is his daughter then they decide to go on a cruise but use it as honeymoon isntead of a family vacation.

Leanne, only 18yo, was living at home then she suddenly owned a home... WHAT?!

Love the story. AAAAA+++++

Nice story, great idea, sexy, keep writing, but get an editor, really. Word choice, missing words, problematic sentences, and a minor story point of two, like house ownership, all these plague your otherwise good story.

Keep at it, get an editor. The idea and most of the plot deserves a 5.

Moving on to chapter 2 now...

Life is a lady dog sometimes, but love also sometimes finds a way.

High to the right, thank you