Objects in the Mirror

He held up his hand. I got a good look at him for the first time. He had abandoned the shaved head look. His hair was cut short. It wasn't a crew cut but not much longer. There was at least as much gray in it as there was black. Maybe there was more salt than pepper in it. The beard was also gone and he looked much, much better without it. I think I fell in love with him all over again.

Suddenly, it all made sense. My heart lurched as I realized that I had lost him a long time ago. Every little clue should have told me that. The first was the car. Dale had always driven Mustangs over the years. He had NEVER let me drive one of them. He obviously loved Anne more than he had ever loved me. The second clue also had to do with the car. If he was going to choose me, he'd never have let her drive off with that car. Giving her the car was his way of telling her that the two of them would still be together after our talk and beyond. The most insidious clue was the hidden one. Ever since I'd seen that car, I'd wondered about the color scheme. The two colors didn't seem to go together but fit so well. Who put charcoal gray and red together? It was so obvious now. He'd painted that God damned car to match their hair colors.

"Dale, when you're out driving around in your car and sometimes when you're lying in your bed at night, you think about me. You wonder where we went wrong and why we didn't work," I said. "You think about me because you still love me. I'm the biggest part of your life. Anne, as nice as she is, can never be me. She's a band aid over the gaping wound that I left in your heart. You can't get away from me because I'm that object in your rearview mirror that you see everywhere you go. Do you know why you almost killed your best friend? That was me, Dale. You got so angry at him for taking me away from you that you channeled all of your rage into one punch. He never had a chance. And you'll always see me in your rearview mirror because I've always been the closest thing to your heart. Just like it says on the mirrors on that fancy car of yours. Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear. That means that I'm probably not only close to your heart, I'm still in it."

"I came here out of curiosity more than anything else," he said. "I guess I hoped that you were sorry for abandoning us. I guess I wondered if you'd realized that picking sex over your family was sometime that you'd want to apologize for. I guess you're more like Bryan than I ever thought. Maybe the two of you always did belong together."

"I'm not like him," I screamed. "We're objects in the mirror, Dale. Look at the mirror."

"I guess I expected this to be hard," he laughed. "But it really isn't. You're just a burned out old whore who wants another chance that she doesn't deserve."

"Look in the mirror dammit," I said. "Anne is not in your mirror."

"Of course she isn't," he laughed. "Is Ellie gone yet? Maybe you should marry Bryan when she passes."

"I can't marry Bryan and I wouldn't if I could. You and I are still married so you can't marry Anne either. We're still married. Objects in the mirror, Dale."

"I divorced you under abandonment, more than a year ago," he said. "I'm marrying Anne as soon as I can get her to a church. Karen is pregnant. Anne is going to be a grandmother. That's what they were laughing about when you were spying on us. And for God's sake stop ranting about objects in the mirror. I'm willing to admit that you and Bryan are the objects in my mirror. But maybe you should take a look at my mirrors on your way out of town and out of my God damned life. Goodbye, Alex." I was in shock.

He was actually walking away from me. I had tried with everything I had to get him back and he had laughed at me. He had never even considered taking me back. He had also divorced me without my knowledge. I had never thought that was possible. Abandonment, I hadn't abandoned him, had I? I thought that I had just left while he calmed down.

The biggest blow had come from my daughter. Karen hadn't even bothered to share with me the fact that she was going to have a baby. Maybe she was still angry about the other day. As I watched the man I love and had given away walking away from me, I heard the rumble. Anne appeared out of nowhere, piloting the brutish car as if she was made for it. She locked the car and ran to leap into Dale's arms. They had obviously made plans before the meeting because they walked down the street holding hands and chatting.

It should have been me walking away with him. But then I never should have left him in the first place. I'd always been so sure that I could have him back whenever I wanted him.

As they walked away, my curiosity got the better of me. I walked over to the car. I'd seen a Mustang or two in my lifetime, mostly Dale's cars over the years, but I knew what to expect. This car was different. Almost every detail of the car had been customized. Almost nothing on it was stock. I looked at the mirror and saw the familiar letters there. But even that was different. I understood it instantly. Dale didn't want me anymore, because unlike me he only looked forward. Dale wasn't stuck in the past the way I was. My time with Dale had been the best part of my life. He was looking forward to the future. The message on his mirrors told me all of that. Instead of, "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear," his read, "Objects in the mirror are losing."

The end.